Der Rüpel
by Enked
Summary: [LevixChildReader]-"I guess I could tell you the story. Though you have to promise, you won't breathe a word to anyone. Otherwise, Humanities Strongest, Captain Levi, will never forgive me. After all, the story centers not only around me, but him as well. I was only eight years old. The corporal, you ask? Well, he was nothing more than a street thug who threw me the crumb."
1. Krümel

"I guess I could tell you the story, if you are really that interested.

Though you have to promise, you won't breathe a word to anyone. Otherwise, _Humanities Strongest,_ Captain Levi, will never forgive me. After all, the story centers not only around me, but him as well.

It's a tale, no the truth about us.

If you must know why, I'll tell. I won't be shy; I'll give you the details. I'll tell you each day, each month, and every year what led us to here. How he became Captain and how I found myself.

I'll explain my eye.

I'll show you the scar.

I'll even tell you how I adopted this similar hair style.

I'll explain the mystery behind Lance Corporal's weird habits, his stern face, and his devotion to his comrades. I think everyone should know how he became who he is today. Why he regrets nothing and how he earned the crest that he wears on his back.

Sure, you deserve to know about your leader, about that brave man I admire so dearly.

Though I warn you, it's not all that pleasant.

The road to get here was challenging. There is sorrow and grief. I remember days of anger and disappoints. However, I also recall the joyous times when we were all together. I can still see their faces and hear their voices.

Sorry, I'm jumping ahead of myself.

I'll take you back to the first memory I had.

And from there, I'll tell you the story through my eyes of how I fell under Captain Levi's Wing."

/

 ** _Updated to fit the story._**

 ** _~Enked_**

* * *

 **Der Rüpel**  
Chapter I: _Krümel_

* * *

 _Please don't look here…._

 _Oh please…_

 _Please don't look here…_

 **Please…**

My dry throat was being scratched the more my lungs pleaded for air. Even with my back up against the wall, my hands clutching the bread, I couldn't escape the adrenaline jitters that were consuming me. The cold air frosted my breath. My pulse jolted through my veins.

The running of heavy footsteps followed me. They were chasing me like the monsters from folktales, legends, and nightmares. Reality didn't ease the evil that lurked in the evenings. The streets weren't afraid to catering to demons.

I tried to control the suffocating coughs that were brewing from my mouth. But how could I? That ticklish sensation kept crawling in my chest. It kept stirring trouble.

The seconds ticked by. Again, my heart let out several erratic beats.

 **I wasn't safe.**

"Where'd that shitty kid go?"

"Fuck if I know. Damn street rat could have scurried anywhere."

"Keep lookin'!"

I heard the men shouting. I couldn't breathe. My muscles tightened around my ribcage. Don't move; don't make a sound, I told myself. My tired eyes burned as I refused to let myself blink. I clutched my food tighter. That's right; squeeze the anxiety away.

Their words were fading.

Mentally, I said a silent prayer. At least, that's what Daddy told me to do. But then again, dad said that and never came back. Suddenly, an unexpected cough burned from my throat. The sound echoed from the alley.

 _Oh no…_

"There's the filthy thief-"

My cracked lips stuttered empty words. I starred at the gang forming around me. My small frame began to shrink lower to the ground. I was confident when I formulated the idea. The plan seemed easy.

Just grab the food and run.

Why, why couldn't anything ever work for me?

"No-please. I-I-" There was no saving myself. I was caught red handed, stealing precious goods.

* * *

My chest wheezed horribly as I staggered down the vacant path. How could the nights be so cold when we weren't even exposed to the elements above? My blurry eyes starred up at the cave ceiling. I remember dad talking about the surface-the warmth. A shiver danced up my back.

The pain of being alone invaded my thoughts again. Dad promised he would be back. He said; he would never leave me alone in the dark. I believed him. I held onto every sound.

My weak limbs couldn't carry me far. I could feel my knees buckling under me. The dull aches in my ribs were making me grow more exhausted. My hands locked onto my sides and did their best to support my broken body. There was no medical treatment, no kiss on the forehead and a sweet cherry tart for support. I had to limp to my own bed.

"You said-" I began taunting myself, "you promised-" Eventually my bruised bones couldn't carry me any longer. I stumbled over my tethered shoes. My hands didn't even bother to catch me before my face smacked the ground. I didn't scream. I silently hissed as the tears leaked from my eyes. There was no point in calling for help.

 _Help never came._

My coughing grew more aggressive as I wobbled on my arms. It took several attempts before I could get my limbs to support my upper half. The chilly breeze nipped my exposed skin. I surrendered to my drained body. With grinding joints, strained muscles, and a crumbling heart I crawled to the nearest shelter. The streetlights did little to proved decent lighting. I couldn't see but a few inches from my face.  
The fear of the unknown was always daunting. However, there was no pick of variety for this evening. Tonight, I would have to endure any trouble I was about to venture into. At this point, if someone wanted me dead, well that's just how it was going to be.

I dragged myself under the _shelter_ and let the effects of the day over take me. My busted lip drained blood onto the cobble floor. My swollen eyes filled with pressure as I laid my head down. Sleeping seemed impossible, the pounding in my head acted like a hammer against my skull. The night shivers pricked my flesh and all I could do was curl into a slight ball.

"You promised-"

Alone I slept.

* * *

"What should we do?"

"We can't leave her like that-she's barely able to breathe."

My eyes slightly cracked open. Where were the voices coming from? I couldn't lift my head but an inch from the stone before my vision spun out of control. My insides twisted as the hunger pains returned. The combination was making me nauseous.

"Levi?" I heard a lighthearted man question. There was an unsettling silence. Though, I wasn't sure what the conversation was entailing. But I figured, I best be on my way. I couldn't endure another, _"_ _wake up call"_ or _"_ _reality check"_ as I was so often told.

With stiff tendons, I heaved into a crawl position. The palms on my hands trembled and heated with agony. My dehydrated lungs ranted into a coughing fit the more I moved. Everything flared with pain.

While the sniffles never ceased.

"Hey kid-!"

Instantly, I froze. The fear bubbled inside of me like a boiling pot. I let the amber locks of hair drift around the sides of my face. What were they going to do to me? I clenched my jaw, unable to imagine any more beatings. A clamor of boots shuffled near me. I reacted by shoving myself deeper into my shelter. I crammed myself as tightly as I could against the angled ceiling. And with shaking arms, I held them in front of me, in hopes of defending myself.

"Ah nice goin' Farlan you scared her half to death." The young girl in front of me was boisterous with her words and obnoxious with her actions. Her choppy pigtails flared around her as she directed the taller man to her right. Still my body trembled.

"Wasn't my intentions, Isabel. " the man spoke gently, "you know me-I didn't mean any harm." I watched as each of them faced me. Their eyes were deciding my fate. I wasn't comfortable, not even in the slightest degree.

I wormed under their presence.

The girl before kneeled to my level. I couldn't help myself, shying away was an automatic reflex. The shadows became my protector of the lurking monsters. My breathing continued to wheeze relentlessly. My scrunched torso screamed, the aches hadn't left from yesterday.

"It's alright-not gonna hurt ya!" The girl cheerfully grinned. I still kept my distance as she talked. "Names Isabel. You gotta name?"

I paused. My memory chip wasn't fitting properly. What did daddy call me? I use to have a name. _Name…_

I remained silent. My heavy eyelids were making it difficult to see, to stay awake. I had to choke the scratchy coughs back down. I wouldn't make a sound. Then they would leave-right? They will grow bored and let me rest. I just want to sleep.

"Hungry kiddo?" The man quietly asked. A reassuring grin rested on his face. My sandy tongue began to become washed with saliva at the sight of the bread. Even my gut rumbled loudly as if it too had seen the glorious food. However, my uncertainty got the better of me.

Trying not to be rude, I simple shook my head. Daddy said, remember your manors.

"Its alright-common you need to eat to build some strength." The man again returned a soft smile. His words were encouraging. The girl took the bread from him and waved the delicious dough in front of me.

"Common its good!"

That bribe wasn't going to work.

"Oh Levi-" The man perked up as a pair of new footsteps joined them. I only sulked more. I couldn't deal with any more people.

Isabel interjected, "Levi-bro the girl won't come out. She's even refusing food. What should we do?" The new member stood with erect posture, polished shoes, and a stern expression.  
"Smart kid." Was _Levi's_ blunt reply. The blonde haired man next to him crossed his arms. Defeat stretched across his face.

"What do you suppose we do?"

"Nothing."

"Levi-bro!" The young girl protested. Her head spun around to the men behind her. Frustration raged in her voice. "You can't say that! She's just a kid. She needs help. Don't be cold stubborn fool." I tried to swallow but the dry patch clogged its path. And in return I got nothing but congested coughs.

I was miserable.

I heard a round of sighs.

The stern man, Levi spoke up as he glanced down at me. "Looks like that kid we saw the other day. Guess someone got their clock cleaned pretty good." I was too tired to care about his remarks. Besides, I didn't own a clock.

"You mean that's the kid who was tussling with those group of boys?" I heard the other man pipe up. Doubt loomed in his tone. Isabel came to my apparent defense.

"Like a girl couldn't take on a few street rats." She looked at me again. "Nothin' wrong with a fightin' spirit." A warm smile crossed her cheeks with an added thumbs up. If I hadn't been so exhausted I would spouted off my record. I had won many boxing fights-after all daddy taught me so.

"Levi-we can't leave her. See that eye socket?" The blonde gestured to my face. "If we don't get that swelling down, she could lose her sight." I heard a sigh from Levi. I shuddered unsure of his mood.

"You know what its like being on the streets. We all do."

"Besides-" Isabel said in a hyper voice, "she's under our staircase. So she's kind of like our responsibility now. Isn't that right Farlan?" The man let out a chuckle.

"I believe so. Wouldn't you agree-uh Levi?"

I stared skeptically at the man before me. His charcoal bangs brushed his grey eyes, his emotionless face. I wasn't sure about him.

"Tell you what kid. " I watched as he tore a small section off the bread. My stomach growled. Then to my surprise that piece was thrown in my direction. My little hands scrambled to catch it. I held the delicate baked good gingerly. Its aroma smelled delicious. "Once you finish that. You can come get more. I want to make sure you're not going to puke everywhere. Don't want the mess." And with that the man named, Levi spun on his heel. I heard him climb the stairs over my head, followed by the shutting of a door.

The others seemed to catch on to something, at the time; I wasn't aware of and left too. Again, I found myself alone surrounded by the shadows. However, to my delight a piece of bread laid in my hands. The doughy fluff was a refreshing bliss. My gut moaned like a wild beast.

 _It's yours…_

 _Enjoy it…_

I lifted the food to my mouth. My tongue nearly got to taste the crunchy substance, but I lowered my head before it could. I sat there with a ragging stomach and a weak body. My mind had insisted that I return what wasn't rightfully mine. Daddy always said, _never ask for handouts._ I was too young to realize that the situation wasn't the same scenario.

With a little more thought and an act of determination I collected myself to my foal like legs. Every nerve fired off like a round of cannons. Standing was sucking the life out of me. With winded lungs, I pulled myself out of shelter and made my way to the stairs.

It was a torturous climb.

I stood in front of the door, light headed, before placing the bread on the floor. I slightly chewed my thumb nail, unsure of what I had done was the correct decision. Just as I was about to back away, my body had all it could handle. Spotted vision coated my sight before I felt my arms smack the cold ground.

"Looks like your plan worked Levi."

I was only able to pick up bits of their conversation. My mind was too scattered from the events leading up to this to connect the dots. I could only feel the drips of blood from my lip. Even now, the pain seemed numb-tingling?

"Ah, well almost-"

"Huh?"

 _No more…_

 _I couldn't handle anymore…_

"She didn't even touch a **crumb** -"

* * *

 **Well, that's the first chapter. A very slow intro but I had to set it up for the next. Yes, I write different than most-I don't believe a young child would jump openly into anyone's arms. Your survival instincts are keeping you on your toes. Trust is going to be something that is earned (I think it makes stories more interesting). Lots of twists and hidden mysteries to come!**

 **Currently writing the second chapter. Stay tuned!**


	2. Ingwer Tee

**Der Rüpel**  
Chapter I: _Ingwer Tee_

 **Went about this chapter a little differently.  
Decided readers needed to feel the personality of the characters a tad more.**

Enjoy!

* * *

Common, it's alright."

I pathetically squirmed away from the man, Farlan. For the last several hours I had been poked, scrubbed, and handled endlessly. I was tired and bordering on crabbiness. Why wouldn't they just let me rest?

A damp-cold-rag was pressed against the rim of my right eye. The throbbing intensified. Again, I hissed and wormed away. The chills crept inside of me like venomous ants. Farlan held me tighter as he tried once more to hold the fabric on my face. I wanted no part in this treatment.

He let out a sigh, "I give too. Guess it wasn't just Isabel. " I sat there on his lap wrapped in oversize clothes that they gave me after my bath. My arms were tucked around my sides for warmth and security. Everything was scary. I wasn't the least convinced these people weren't dangerous. Daddy said, _don't trust anyone…especially men._

"Ugh-" Isabel groaned, "raising kids is hard!" I looked at her quietly with a busted face. Was I really that much trouble? I didn't want to cause problems-they led to punishments. But still I remained tight lipped. "Maybe she's deaf- a mute?"

Farlan laughed, "Nah-just a little nervous is all. She'll talk when she's ready. Common let's see that eye-" He came at me with the cloth. I held up my hand and drifted my head away while coughs erupted from my chest. "Stubborn."

"She and Levi-bro would get along great!" Isabel cracked up at her joke and eventually Farlan joined her. Levi strolled into the room unaware that he was the center of the commotion.

"Ah Levi just in time-" Farlan stood up with me in his arms. I lightly clung to his shirt. What was he going to do with me? "Here-you're on duty." I was shuffled into the hesitant limbs of the shorter man. His stiffness only fed into my fears.

"Tch, no way-I'm not apart of child sitting." My heart raced with anxiety. I wasn't going to get punished right? My body slightly tensed. Farlan tossed the rag to Levi.

"Just give it a try. Once that swelling is down then she can lie down and rest. But until then, we can't have that fluid filling around there." Farlan rubbed my head softly before walking off.

"Isabel come over here-" Levi was cut off.

"No way Levi-bro. It's your turn. Besides she's like a copy of you." The girl let out a giggle before dancing off with her other friend.

"Hey-Isabel! Farlan-!" Levi called. But no answer was returned other than the sound of my mucus filled lungs breathing near his ear. With a heavy sigh, the man holding me walked toward an empty chair and took a seat. I was consumed with the feeling of pins and needles. His robotic actions and unwelcoming tone kept me on edge.

Without a word and without resistance from me, the cloth pressed around my eye. I let out a light cry as the pain sizzled under the busted skin. Levi gently blotted the area before again applying pressure.

"Tch. She's nothing like me." Levi whispered as he rotated the cloth to the colder side. "Her eyes haven't seen everything, yet." He talked at me as if I wasn't there. His words were low and subtle.

My body relaxed against his. I let my head be cradled under his collarbone and his heartbeat soon became my lullaby. I hadn't realized how comforting it was to be close to someone. To an individual that was calm and reassuring.

"Dad-" I muttered unexpectedly.

After a while, my eyes grew heavy enough to let myself drift into a light sleep.

* * *

"Shhh, its ok! It was just a dream-just a bad dream!" Isabel was frantic as she tried to figure out what to do. Not even the bribe of going outside was going to settle me down.

"Daddy-! Dad-" I sobbed uncontrollably. My lungs chocked on the dry air and my body swelled with heat. Even my forehead and back was damp with sweat. I felt a hand touch my skin above my brows. My eyes rapidly blinked as I tried to adjust my vision. It was painful opening them, the swelling; the bubbling stove inside me was putting a heavy amount of pressure on the lids. My cracked lips cried for my dad again. _I just wanted him._

The hand jerked away from my skin.

"She's burning up. Wow, that's a horrendous fever." Farlan sat on the edge of the bed. The tears spilled as he tried to wrestle me from out of the blankets. I whined, pleaded for the warmth to come back. My insides were shivering up like frosted windows.

Farlan tried to comfort me. His hand would rub my rosy cheek and then down my arm. Goosebumps would follow his touch.

"I-I want my Dad. Daddy-" I mumbled in despair. Though it seemed as though my desires were never to be answered. I tossed myself away from their direction. My ribs shrieked in agony, as the bruised bones weren't ready for any weight. Even my lungs reminded me of how drowned with mucus they were. Again, the relentless coughing began.

"I know kiddo-I know." Farlan slowly twisted my knotted self back onto my spine. I bit back the cries. _Don't be troublesome_ , that's what dad always said. "Once we get you back on your legs, we will get you to you dad." Even over my raspy breathing I could hear those enlightening words.

My glassy eyes slightly widened, "Really?"

"Hey-nice to see those full eyes kid! No more tears-m'k?" Isabel sent me a huge smile followed by her usual laugh. I blinked a few times before looking at Farlan. Hope, still rested on my shoulders.

"You promise?" I asked with a horse tone. Farlan's blue orbs wouldn't tell a lie.

"I promise." He glanced at me, and then gently ruffled my hair before continuing. "We'll search high and low. And even venture where no one goes-until your with your dad again." Weakly I lifted up my small pinkie finger.

"Swear?" I questioned. It wasn't a done deal unless someone swears to the pinkie, dad had mentioned on a cloudy day. I waited. Farlan, was quicker and more brilliant, in my eyes, he held out his crossed arms with too pinkies.

"I'll double swear to it, kiddo." He and I, with crossed limbs, and locked fingers made the agreement. "On my life even."

And with that, I returned a small grin.

Those were the only muscles that weren't overly sore.

* * *

It was a chilling silence.

It seemed so long ago, when Isabel and Farlan had decided to retreat to their rooms. I couldn't blame them; they had spent hours with me. Between the doctoring, catering, and emotional healing, I was surprised they hadn't deserted me sooner. Now, I was beginning to feel that lonely solitude, I had endured on the streets.

The nightly shivers invaded me from the inside.

Farlan decided it would be better if my body lowered to its normal temp. And in doing, so required me to be bare for the remainder of the night. The baggy clothes weren't much to count on, when battling goosebumps.

My teeth began to chatter.

I tried to imagine the fun moments before they left. My mind was occupied while they were here, Farlan and Isabel. I was beginning to enjoy their company, their friendly conversations. I didn't voice much; instead, I simply listened. Honestly, it was the most blissful time. Lately, I couldn't recall, an interaction that didn't involve a scuffle or bickering.

However, these thoughts weren't scaring off the devils under my skin.

 _Oh, the chills._

My eyes scanned the area. It was a small bedroom, with undecorated walls, a musty smell, creaky floors, but still clean. My eyes peaked at the dim ceiling.

 _Yeah, still clean-_

I let out sigh as the shiver coated my body. I squeezed myself tighter and practically blew hot puffs of breaths into my hands. It was useless.

Hesitantly, I uncoiled myself and listened for any detection of sounds. I waited, in silence and darkness while my ears were on radar. The seconds ticked by; and not a trace was heard. The only noise that tickled my senses was the light snores escaping the other resident's rooms. I twiddled my thumbs.

 _Was this a good idea?_

I slowly, almost in a robotic fashion, shifted to the edge of the bed before I dangled my legs over the edge.

 _What if you get caught?_

 _What then?_

I pushed my weak body from the mattress. My tiny fingers nervously danced by my chest, as I contemplated over instincts v.s emotions. It was hard making choices. My mind felt like a broken record; its disk never seemed to come to a conclusion.

 **Around and around it spun.**

 **And awkwardly I stood.**

Finally, my stomach had turned enough to flush away all the built up fear. I had convinced myself that I was simply looking for warmth. There wasn't any harm in that, right?

 _"_ _Get some sleep, kiddo. We'll be in the next room over. If you need anything just ask. Don't leave the room without one of us, alright?" Farlan ruffled my hair one last time before exiting the room._

 _The instructions had been clear._

 **Don't leave the room-**

Miraculously, I had floated across the uneven floorboards without as much as a squeak. My fingers hovered over the chipped door handle. Though, my head felt foggy, I continued onward. I held my breath, before I gently pushed open the heavy wooden frame. I nearly fainted.

The door wasn't in favor of my idea.

Its screeching hinges cried out against me. I stopped, and then tried again. Regardless, the door refused to cooperate. I heard stirring from the rooms next to me. Once the bed rustling settled, I went about leaving.

It took time however; I had managed to worm my way through opening. I glanced around. Since, the area wasn't large, I could easily make out the couch I had sat on when I first arrived. The table set was somewhat fuzzy, but visible within the shadows.

The snores echoed.

At that point, I assumed _everyone_ was in bed. With a bit more confidence, I headed towards the furniture in the main room. I recalled seeing my old clothes from before. Any extra fibers would be gracious, even if there were holes.

It was a struggle to walk, let alone be light footed. Let's not forget that holding back coughs was a difficult duty on its own. With burning lungs, I made my way into the room. It took some time to survey the area. For some reason, my vision was growing worse. My right eye throbbed horribly.

After snooping around, checking behind the couch, shuffling a few counter objects, and sighing in defeat, I figured it would be best if I headed back. I didn't want to get in trouble. Punishment wasn't something I wished for.

As my weary feet carried me to my room, a dense looming darkness caught my attention. My heart hammered as my eyes engaged the partly open door. The feeling wasn't settling well with my gut.

 **However-**

 _"_ _Remember, curiosity killed the cat." Dad had looked at me with tired eyes, "That has to be one of your worst traits."_

A cooler air brushed my pink cheeks. I stepped pasted the doorway. The room had the damp feeling of a crawlspace not of sleeping quarters.

"Is-is this someone's bedroom?" I whispered to myself. The dizziness was growing over me. I blindly gripped the edge of a hard surface. My nails scrapped the rough texture. "A desk?" I choked back a few aching coughs. My nerves were still on edge as I headed towards my left. The only light came from the streetlamps behind the cracks of the cement walls.

From what I could make out, the desk was worn but polished. It was bulky with multiple drawers. The chair was positioned just so within the open space. Everything was neatly put away. Upon closer examination, there didn't appear to be a single scratch anywhere.

My thoughts drifted and so did my line of sight. I looked around the room. Nothing seemed to peak my interests. The bed was well kept, sheets were smooth, corners tucked, and the pillow was well centered on the mattress. Did someone actually live here?

I heard a distant thud.

My adrenaline jolted.

The muscles in my limbs stiffened.  
Quickly, I slid underneath the desk's space. The chair's base nearly touched my chin, as my veins pulsed while the footsteps from the main room grew louder. My eyes went wide. I thought everyone was asleep? I clenched the tendons around my ribcage.

 _Don't make a noise._

 _Don't cough._

The sound of boots shuffled back and forth. I heard a door creak followed by a few huffs. That didn't sound like Farlan. I could feel the stove within me ignite. Instantly, I was coated in a sweat. I forced myself to even cease breathing.

 _I told you, you would get caught-_

 _Remember what dad said?_

 _Remember, dear? Curiosity killed the-_

The tension never left, even when I caught sight of small handle jutting out above my head. Cautiously, I let myself pull at the strange object. It took some effort and some wiggling, but eventually a small door slid open. The footsteps had stopped; for the moment figured I was safe.

With a twisted wrist, I reached up into the trap door. Normally, I would have told myself that digging a deeper hole for myself wouldn't be in my best interest. How could I resist though? I didn't feel anything at first. I had to keep fishing, eventually my fingers wrapped around a smooth plated item. Something fluttered to ground.

When brought into focus, I could see the lite glint of silver. My hand cradled the knife as my other finger traced the flat blade. I usually wasn't afraid of these sorts of tools. Daddy used them countless times.

Except this, this one was hidden.

"Wh-y?" I pinched my brows.

I hadn't heard the footsteps. Had I, I wouldn't have been caught dead with this secret weapon in my hand. Nor would I have been seen outside the room. I couldn't control the fear that was pooling through my body.

A blood stained cloth lay at my feet.

"Wha-wha-tt" I shuttered as my eyes watered. Who were these people? Thugs? Killers? My mind was swirling with confusion. They weren't planning on killing me, were they? The imagination exploded within me. I wanted to scream but instead, I found myself only able to tremble.

 _Daddy warned you not to trust others._

 _You disobedient little girl-_

The burning sensation was brewing in my chest.

"What do you think you're doing?" A low voice growled. The panic snaked under my skin; it crept around the organs, and strangled my throat. "Get out of there-now." His tone wasn't one to argue with.

Reluctantly, I crawled out with shaking arms. My stomach twisted in knots. What was to come of me? I hung my head low. I couldn't meet his gaze, those cold eyes. The knife was pressed under my palm. There was no hiding the truth.

 _"_ _Admit your crimes, child!" Dad said in a raised voice._

"What the hell do you think you're doing, brat?" His tone was no less furious.

I whimpered uncontrollably.

I felt strong hands squeeze my shoulders. Instantly, I was hoisted to my feet. There was no denying the anger on the man's face. His thin tight lip was snarled. His brows pushed on his narrow eyes. All I could do was shake in his hold.

"Answer me!"

"I-I" But I couldn't get the words out. My mouth was too dry. I found myself subjected to tear stain cheeks. The sockets of my eyes pounded with pain. My congested lungs fired like cannons. "I-I'm so-sorry. Sorry-I didn't mean-I was just-"

My leaky eyes turned into soft cries.

"Tch." Eventually, his grip loosened. "Hand it over." His voice gradually relaxed as he held out his hand. Without question, I passed the blade to him. Still the fears of the unknown danced within me. Levi bent over and retrieved the bloody cloth as well.

"So-sorry-" I said with an aching heart. I knew I was in the wrong; and even more so, I was sorry I was caught. The sweat dripped from around my neck. The sickness was consuming me. "I-"

"Forget it." The man slammed a desk door next to me. I flinched. Levi let out another sigh. "Don't let me catch you in here again. We clear?" I nodded frantically.  
"Yes-yes Sir." I replied with bouts of sniffles. I watched Levi's expression somewhat soften. Still I remained, tense with worry. If I could have hid in the sleeves of my clothes, I would have.

"What are you doing out of bed?" He asked bluntly. I swallowed a lump.

"I-I was cold, Sir."

"Look at me-" The tips of his fingers raised my chin to his view. I looked anywhere but directly into his gaze. I didn't want him to think I was a threat. "That swelling is back. You knock it on something, brat?" I looked away from him.

"No, Sir." I felt a hand rest on my back. I sucked in a mouthful of air.

"Common, let's get you fixed up."

* * *

Levi led me toward the sitting area.

Again, I sat on Levi's lap while he applied another cloth to my eye. He had wrapped me in one of his used jackets and several blankets. A steaming cup of **Ingwer Tee** rested warmly in my hands. Its sweet aroma filled my aching airway and was additive to my taste buds.

"Better to sweat that fever out."

My limbs no longer left numb. I nodded in agreement.

"Keep sipping."

I did as I was told. The tea was delicious; it wasn't difficult task. My lips met the hot liquid before taking a huge gulp. The spice sizzled down my throat.

"Tha-Thank you- Sir." I said shyly. The cloth rotated around my eye. The pressure made my skin sore, but the surprisingly, the coolness of the fabric felt good.

"Tch. Just don't spill any of my clothes. Otherwise, you'll be washing it." I took another sip, hoping to avoid the topic. The rag was pulled away from my face. Levi's thumb rubbed around the rim of my eye. I looked at him with uncertainty.

"Who did this to you?" The man asked rather quickly. I wasn't sure what he meant. Hesitantly, I asked.

"What do you mean, Sir?" I blinked.

"Who caused you to go blind in that eye-?"

* * *

 **Oh my-what do we have here?**  
 **A hidden past-**  
 **A bloody cloth-**  
 **And an unexpected change in an eye color-?**

 **What do we have in store for the next chapter?**  
 **Favorite, Like, Review-Keep's reader's inspired!**


	3. Berliner

**Der Rüpel**  
Chapter III: _Berliner_

/

/

The wheezing eventually turned into _constant_ low whimpers.

For the past week, my illness never seemed to take a rest. It was brutal, to say the least. Those expanding organs in my chest kept shooting piercing pains over every little suckle of air. Basically, I was on the verge of turning blue, from the lack of airflow.

A pitiful moan escaped my chapped lips.

"Poor kid-" Farlan laid a hand on my head. Had I not been already paralyzed with aching muscles, I would have flinched away. Every touch was intensified, as if I had taken a direct blow to my body.

It was like this, one moment I felt a surge of energy, then the next I was wiped out. The tea treatment had worked, however only for little segments. For the last few days my permanent residence became: _Room 3 of the Trio Thugs_. That's right, I figured out _what_ they were.

"What do ya' suppose we do?" Isabel was kneeling next to the bed. Concern lingered in her voice. All I could manage was to stay conscience. The little slits in my eyes begged to differ. Farlan let out of a long sigh, which was uncharacteristic of him.

"Not much can be done without medicine. "

"We can't just let her suffer! She's practically dead. Look at her-she can't even breath properly!" Isabel's ranting was causing my own brain to rattle. _Please, stop._

"I'm aware of that Isabel!" Farlan snapped. I could slightly see his figure jerking in her direction. The tension was growing thicker as the moments ticked by. Slowly, I shifted myself under the blankets. "I'm not God-I can't magically heal her!"

"I never said _you,_ had to personally fix the problem! All I'm sayin' is we have to figure out a solution-"

The arguing seemed to last for an eternity. Back and forth the comments ricocheted in the room. My head spun, my lungs screamed, and my gut twisted with hunger. **Swallowing, oh how it was impossible.**

Unexpectedly, a door slammed followed by the noise of multiple shoes strutting across the floor. If I hadn't been in a daze, I might have sat up. However, all I could do was brew with that deadly fever and a ticklish sensation of nausea.

"Levi who-?" Farlan began to ask. Isabel jumped the gun and spouted the burning question.

"Who the heck is this, Levi-Bro? Better not be a spy of the Military Police or else-" The leader of the group simply, 'tch' as his initial response. That was never a good sign. Usually, that sound effect indicated you said something stupid.

"Don't be an idiot-" Levi started. _Yeah, I was right_. "He's nothing more than the local physician." I heard more boots walking across the squeaky floors.

"Is this the child?" A raspy voice questioned.

"Yeah, that's the brat."

I could hear Farlan and Levi whispering across the room. I didn't catch much, other than the deep irritation from Levi, and his grumpy complaints about my nightly coughing. How, quote, he was tired of the noise and so he took matters into his own hands. I felt a warm wrinkled touch near my face. I tensed horribly.

"Let's have a look shall we-?" The man sounded older, with exhaustion hindering in his vocal cords. The blankets were pulled from my grasp. I couldn't control the shivers pricking my skin. Eventually, I cracked my eyes open enough to get a glance at the individual. Just like his hands, his face was aged. He had tiny eyes and grey whisker-like eye brows. He didn't look like a doctor. At least, not like the one I had seen before when I was with dad.

This man was simply wearing casual dirty clothing. Not the typical white outfit I could recall.

The gentleman pulled out a wormy device with a silver circular object at the end. He placed two silver poles in his ears then approached me with the other end.

The cold plate rested on my chest. "Alright, lets hear those lungs. Take some deep breathes for me." I hesitated, before shaking my head. Breathing was agonizing for me. Not to mention, my coughing fits would plague me again. I thought about Levi, how the noise would irritate him.

 **I wouldn't do it.**

 **They couldn't make me.**

"Elke, just inhale-big breathes like when you have your afternoon tea. Remember-?" Farlan smiled warmly at me from over the doctor's shoulder. I sunk deeper into the mattress. _Yes, I knew what they wanted._ I painfully gulped. _However, I also knew what Levi didn't want._

"Just through the mouth instead." Isabel chimed in. "Like this-" The energetic girl performed the _obvious_ demonstration. She over exaggerated opening her mouth and the widening of her ribs, followed by letting out a boisterous exhale.

"Let's give it a go." The doctor let out a sigh. With all those observing eyes on me, I didn't have much of a choice. I did as I was told.

 **Inhale-**

My lungs instantly shot off the sensation of the prodding of thousands of pins inside the tissues. The throbbing intensified, pressured soared around my chest, and I felt the fire burning inside of me to choke the pain.

Nothing could stop me once it started. The coughs were so repetitive; I couldn't even get a once of air for several minutes. I would pathetically attempt to clutch my airway, as if I could reach through and pull out the cobweb forming inside of there.

"Alight-that's good. Alright, easy their hun." The doctor moved the cold metal under my thin shirt. The hacking never dwindled. "Ok, let's sit her up before she coughs the rest of her organs out." Hands reached under my spine and effortlessly held my limp body. Even my eyes began to water.

"It-It hurts. Here-it hurts deep." I winched in-between shallow breaths. I just wanted to be numb. Feeling nothing would be a blessing.

"I know kiddo-we'll get ya feeling better soon." Farlan rubbed my back. My head was barely raised. I was near freezer temp by the time the doctor finished all his "mental chartings". I had a thermometer shoved under my tongue, a heart beat count, a list of questions thrown at me, and was pressured checked from my throat to my gut.

 _Conclusion- yes, everything hurt._

"She can lay back down-but keep her slightly elevated. I don't want anymore fluid draining deeper into her lungs." The older man mumbled his orders, which were luckily carried out.

"Well-?" I heard Levi's agitated tone arise from behind. He had been a shadow through the entire evaluation. I had almost forgotten he was there. The doctor started unpacking some items from a tethered bag he had brought in. Glass cracked against each other as his hand was fishing for the objects.

The man then let out a grunt, "This has to be, by far, the worst case of _Pneumonia_ I have yet to have seen in all my years of practice." I heard another clank from his hands. "And I've been in the business for quite sometime, my friend." There was an awkward silence, aside from my congested breathing.

The doctor cleared his throat before continuing. "This child needed medical care weeks ago. Her lungs are so inflamed I'm surprised you didn't wake up to a dead daughter. You should have contacted me sooner-"

"She's not _ours"_ Levi hissed. "She planted herself under our damn staircase and-"

"And-"Farlan interrupted, "She's our responsibility now. So, what's to be done?"

Isabel interjected as well, "Yea, what's the verdict?" Levi groaned.

"It's not a court case, idiot-"

The doctor let out another husky gruff to clear his vocal cords. "The diagnosis is, as I mentioned, Pneumonia. Most likely, viral, which means she contracted it from germs being spread. And if you are speaking the truth-" The man paused. "And she was truly out on the streets for many months, then her weakened immune system didn't stand a chance against the nightly chills."

"She can be cured, right? She's going to be ok, right?" Isabel pressed. I listened as quietly as I could.

"Well-" the doctor sounded bleak. "I'll be honest, the chances of her living through this, is as slim as they come. I've seen healthy grown adults succumb to this disease. She's so weak and malnourished; I'm surprised she was even walking around a few days ago, like you claim she was. She's a stoic kid."

It was horrifying to hear those phrases pass through my ears. The man who was suppose to help me, was now sentencing me to death. The thoughts crept around my mind; they were eating away at me like creepy bugs. The idea of dying scared me to the core. I knew about death, dad told me about it. It was an endless realm of darkness and you become nothing more than the ash of your former self.

 _Yes, daddy told me all about_ _ **Death**_ _._

Tears lightly pricked at my eyes.

"However, I do believe with some assistance and antibiotics; a _miracle_ can happen." My heart fluttered slightly. _A miracle?_

"Tch."

"Now, I'm going to start her off with an injection. From there, she'll need these pills swallowed whole for the next twenty-one days. Not one day should be missed. Otherwise, the process will have to start all over. Understand?"

"Yes-" Both Farlan and Isabel were instantaneous with their responses.

"Very good." The doctor fiddled with a small bottle along with a thin-finger-long needle. My blood ran cold at the sight of the terrifying item. I remembered something similar to this.

 _I remember,_

 _I remember,_

 **The burning…**

"No-no-no-" I pleaded in rapid breathes. "I won't cough-I promise-I won't be trouble. Please-Please no shot!" I was begging at Farlan and Isabel. My eyes were wide with panic. They wouldn't do this to me? I thought I had been good. I hadn't done anything wrong, right? I did everything as perfect as possible, just like Daddy had taught me. I was no trouble.

"Elke, its just a simple poke. It won't hurt that much. Here just-" Farlan tried to wrestle me back towards the doctor. I squirmed and fought. Yes, I acted out. The tears poured from my eyes. I was heartbroken and scared down to every nerve in my body. Dad was right; you shouldn't trust people. "It'll make you feel better-Elke!" Farlan was startled when I threw myself on the opposite side of the floor.

"No-no poke." I quivered in sobs. I wobbled to my feet as I braced myself against the bed. "Daddy-dad-"

As if on cue a pair of stiff arms wrapped around my torso. I fought intensely, and blindly clawed at the limbs that were lifting me upwards. I kicked and thrashed against the tight hold.

"Let me go! No- I don't want it! Let go!" I struggled even with the sickly body I had. My congested cries filled the room. I didn't want this. The idea of being forced, caged, swarmed inside of me like agitated bugs. The fear of what was to come, challenged me to take drastic measures. I opened my jaw as wide as I could and positioned my teeth near the flesh of my holder. Before I could chomp, the arms holding me twisted me inwards. My chest met with soft clothes. My tears spilled on the fibers next to my cheek.

"You bite me brat, and I'll bite back."

Instantly, I craned my head upward. Levi had a non-amused expression resting on his face. I wished now, I had just taken the pain. The fight was over.

"Will she hold still for you?" The doctor questioned. I felt Levi's firm hands supporting me. Sort of like, a mild threat.

"She better-" He mumbled. I looked from the older man to Levi. The clock started once the doctor started making his way over. Fighting wasn't an option, however-

"Levi-Sir, please don't let him hurt me. Pl-please I won't-" My words were interrupted when I felt a heavy weight hang over my shoulders. I knew that feel. I snuggled deeper into the jacket, that piece of clothing had become a comfort.

"As long as this is around you-" Levi adjusted his old fabric, "no harm will ever come to you. Think of it, like a shield." I starred at him with uncertainty.

"How does it work, Sir?" I asked. His steel eyes looked ahead and then they shifted to me. He took a breath.

"It works only when you think of _impossible things_." Levi replied clearly. I was so engrossed in his words, that I hadn't heard the footsteps creeping up behind me. My arms had looped around his neck. He had my full attention.

"Im-impossible-Sir?" I did my best to pronounce the word. Levi moved his hand to support my leaning back.

"Yes-something you wish you could accomplish but never thought you could." I let a perplexed expression cross my face. _What did accomplish mean?_ I felt a warm grip tug at my arm. I jumped in Levi's hold. Tears started to water in my eyes.

"You said-"

"Tell me-" I quickly looked at Levi. He had never asked me anything. "Something you have always wanted but never was allowed." I had to really think for a moment.

"Um, I've always wanted to try another **jelly donut**. Like the one Dad bought me before. They were really-" Levi shook his head.

"That's not impossible enough."

 _Impossible…_

I sniffed up the dried tears. "Um, um I've-" I halted. Maybe I shouldn't say what came to my mind. What would Levi think? The man holding me shifted his weight.

"Well-?" Again, the pressure was on me. I darted my eyes around.

"I've-I've always wanted to go up there, again." I raised my head to the ceiling.

"Tch." I shuttered at the response. Then I heard a slight, _amused_ snort. "That'll work, brat." I nearly gleamed. Had I actually responded appropriately to his question? I starred at him with pride.

"All done here." The doctor's voice interrupted my thoughts. I turned to look at the older man. He had lowered the needle in his hand. A small seep of blood dripped from my arm. I tilted my head as I watch the man wipe my arm clean. "And you say she's not your daughter."

* * *

"Before you go, could you look at her eye? It seems to be getting worse" Farlan asked.

After the invisible shield had protected me, the way Levi had said, I was settled back into bed. Though, I really wanted to still be held. However, I decided not to push my luck. Ending on a good note, was pleasing enough.

"Ah yes- your friend had mentioned it when he was persuading-" The doctor coughed, "more like threated me to come." Isabel and Farlan could be heard moaning over the embarrassment of their leader. Apparently, against his size, Levi used force to make things happen quite often.

Levi rattled the bottle of pills, "Got the job done, though." The doctor huffed as he returned to the bedside. I was still wrapped in the jacket I had refused to be removed from its skin. My eyes were slowly growing heavy.

"Let's see-uh" The man choked on his words when his fingers opened my own lids. "Holy-"

* * *

"Um, Levi-Sir?" I asked softly. My thumbs twiddled inside the sleeves of the jacket. Levi sat in the chair across the room. His cold eyes were still fixed on the book. He hadn't stopped flipping though the pages since Isabel and Farlan left.

Which was quite sometime ago.

"Sir-?" I tried again, except with a stronger voice. Levi didn't bother to look at me he simply kept scanning the pages.

"Hm?" I swallowed before continuing.

"Uh, Sir, um wh-what did the doctor mean when he said I had-had uh a Cato-" I stopped midsentence unable to say the word.

" _Cataract_." Levi clarified as he flipped another page. I sat in silence for a moment.

"Yeah, what does that mean?" I then slipped in a 'Sir' at the end. I couldn't be improper around him. He set such high standards, I couldn't disappoint.

"It explains why your eye has that bluish-" Levi hesitated, "well, whitish film over the iris. Also, solves the question as to why you bump into things and misjudge distances. We discovered that when we tossed you that bag and it bounce off your head. It illustrates a lot actually." I gently touched my eye. I may not be able to see my hand from that side, however I could still feel my tender fingers.

"Levi-Sir?"

"Hm?"

"Why do you think that man left after he felt my head? I mean, I know I yelped accidently but-but I didn't mean to honest-" Levi sighed before he lowered the book.

"You ask a lot of questions when you're no longer sick." I played with the sleeves of the jacket after I realized I had annoyed him. "Not really sure why, brat. He didn't make a lot a sense to begin with. Shouldn't be surprised though. His damn ass was thrown out from his surface practice years ago. He's a low dirty piece of shit. Surprised he was actually able to treat you." Levi looked at me. I nodded in understanding.

"Tch. I can tell you want to ask another question. " My eyes went wide at Levi's words.

"No! Uh-well-I mean-" I stuttered as I was fumbled for an explanation.

"Just ask before I start reading again."

"I was-was wondering if you could read out loud." I looked away from him. Embarrassment leaked on my cheeks. It was true though. Anytime, Levi was here and wasn't cleaning he was engrossed in story. I figured it must be good literature since he never stopped. They were probably exciting like the one's mom read to me when I was younger. Maybe they even had pictures.

"I doubt _Der Prozess_ would be captivating for you." Levi replied casually. I let my shoulders deflate at the rejection.

"Oh-" Then I heard that 'sigh'.

"Tell you what. I'll read out loud if you promise to take your meds without a damn fuss this time. " After nearly two weeks of being bed ridden and choking pills down, I finally had a reason to let out a huge smile. I nearly jumped with excitement as Levi handed me my glass of water and the carrot sized med. It was horribly bitter, yet it wouldn't hinder me this time. I guzzled the cup to its final drop. The pill rested in my belly.

I waited patiently, as Levi pulled the wooden chair towards the side of the bed. He positioned himself, with a crossed leg, and one arm over the back of the chair. He then opened the book back to his original spot.

"What's it about?" I asked happily. The raven hair man turned the novel over in his hand as if he was trying to find the answers written somewhere.

"It's about a man, who is charged, persecuted, by an unidentified agency and is convicted of a crime we no nothing about. Has a rather tragic ending." Levi said. I pondered.

"How do you know how it ends then, Sir?"

"I've re-read this novel more times than I can count, brat."

"Doesn't that get boring, Sir?"

"Tch, no. Every time I re investigate this story, I find something new. Every time, you get another clue that you missed before. Every time- another hidden truth is discovered. Life's like layers brat, getting to the center takes time."

I sat there and thought as deeply as I could about what Levi had said. I wasn't entirely sure if I understood him, however I liked how it sounded. Levi, in my eyes, was a vast ocean of endless information and wisdom.

 _He reminded me of my Dad._

"Chapter five-" Levi began.

I listen intently, as I was careful not to miss a secret piece. Levi had velvet-like voice when he read. It wasn't harsh; instead, it was steady and soothing. He paused when necessary, turned the page with ease, and never stumbled over a word.

I loved every moment of it, and like a sponge soaked up the memories.

"I don't think he did it-" I said in the middle of Levi's reading.

"We're not even half way through. Why do you say that, brat?"

"Because, he sounds like a pretty good guy-" I snuggled into my jacket as I edge closer to his side of the bed. I looked at him with a small smile.

 **You don't need both eyes to see everything.**

* * *

 **Yes!**

 **Got all the details in here perfectly.**

 **Oh it's setting up so well for the next chapter.**

 **I love toying with people's emotions.**

 **Please note, I'm not a doctor.**

 **Don't expect all medical references to be accurate.**

 **It's a Fanfiction-information isn't all going to be exact to life.**

 **Thanks!**


	4. Schokolade

**There are a lot of time gaps- [ -] are your clues.**

 **Had tons of fun writing this chapter.**

 **Enjoy!**

 **There are a lot of time gaps- [ /] are your clues.**  
 **Had tons of fun writing this chapter.**  
 **Enjoy!**

 **Der Rüpel**  
Chapter IV: _Schoklade_

* * *

After about a month of being bedridden and another month of being hounded by Levi to get back under the covers, since according to him I hadn't fully recovered, I officially had developed the "ants in my pants syndrome".

Toward the end of month two, I finally got my wish. Ironically, I was told I should be grateful for being allowed to have my hand at the _cleaning_. After multiple demonstrations, practice runs, and occasional lectures on the proper technique, I was finally granted privilege to use the mop _on my own_.

I never fussed though.

I was content with how my life had turned out.

The four of us co-existed within the small house as if we were raised together. The only arguing, if ever, was usually over poor sanitary treatment. Which, nine times out of ten was the result of Isabel's laziness.

* * *

Month three was no less uneventful.

I still recall the day; Isabel and Farlan brought home an injured bird. I was even more ecstatic when Levi said he could stay. Even though, he constantly bickered about the filth, we all managed around it.

"He's sort of like you, huh Elke?" The blonde said as he wrapped the bird's wing. I took my finger and gently stroked the animal's soft head; the way Isabel had shown me.

"What'd you mean?" I asked with pure curiosity. "I mean-I'm not _that_ small. And-and I don't have feathers." Farlan had a good chuckle at my statement.

"No that's true. And-your pretty tall for your age, kiddo-" The bird nestled deeper into the box made nest, "what I meant was, he's injured, but I believe with a little time, some food, and care he'll come around. What do you think?" I tilted my head before replying with a firm nod.

"Yeah, he'll make it. He's a fighter." I smiled at the creature. Farlan ruffled my hair then rubbed his finger by the rim of my right eye. Aside from forever having a slight rattle in my chest at night, I had made a full recovery from the _Pneumonia._ However, Farlan starred at me with concern, my outward appearance wasn't settling well with my caretakers.

Yes, I had put on a healthy amount of weight. I was never picky, all veggies ands grains satisfied my taste buds. Even my former cuts and sores were no longer visible; my skin basically glowed under the streetlights. I looked damn good, as Levi had said.

 **Except, I was never allowed to see myself in a mirror.**

Honestly, I couldn't even give someone a description of myself; it had been that long. I never confessed, but I had heard the three of them one evening discussing 'the' topic when they thought I was asleep. It was startling to hear exactly what they saw. Apparently, the entire eye socket looked busted, exactly like a black eye. It was so dark in color that from a distance it seemed as though there wasn't an eye to begin with.

Not to mention, a new sprout of pinkish-purple veins had started creeping near my lids. Overall, I remember hearing how _prominent_ the sight was. I guess; I should be fortunate all the reflections were raised to new heights. Since I never saw it, it was almost as if the defect never existed. All of them, including Levi, treated me as an equal.

I couldn't have ask for anything more.

* * *

Another couple of weeks had passed. My confidence with the lifestyle grew immensely. Unlike before, there was no more praying answers from me. It was as if they were seeing an entire new kid. I had blossomed from my former shell, matured more, and even developed an underlining trust with everyone. Each individual had a particular place in my heart. They all provided the support or care I needed in there own way.

Discoveries and adventurous outings were always Isabel's doings. I would follow her around, constantly glued to any activity she was engaged in. She was the older sister I never knew I wanted.

"Here-" Isabel shoved the beige feather into my hands. "Keep it." I twisted my lips in confusion. My fingers played with the tips of the ticklish hair.

"Won't he need it?" I ask, a bit concerned. Isabel let out a snorting laugh and nearly fell off the outside ledge we were sitting on. Having an accident one foot from the front door wasn't going to go over well with Levi.

The red head finally got control over herself to continue, "Don't be silly, it came loose, there's no way you can screw it back in." I twirled the feather. _Maybe I could somehow._ "Besides-keep it, it's a reminder." I looked at her as I tucked my amber locks.

"A re-?" I couldn't get the word out. Isabel lightly kicked her feet back and forth as she looked out to the dead underground city.

"Yea it's a reminder. A symbol-" I perked up; I knew what symbol meant.

"What does it mean?" I asked. Isabel glanced upwards. Her eyes scanned the cave's dreary cover. It didn't bother me as much as it did her. I had everything I ever could have imagined, the sun wasn't that important.

"That's our ticket to freedom. As long as we have that feather it will remind us of our dream. Our dream to be above this and to live as citizens under the open skies."

The following day, our little friend, was taken to an opening and turned free. I might not have been able to tag along, however I knew he was in good hands. Besides, I had plenty of chores to do.

* * *

"Elke-" My attention was directed away from my polishing.

"Yes?" I asked as respectfully as possible. Farlan strolled in with Isabel behind him. They were unloading their 3DM Gear for the evening. I never got tired of watching them fly across the sky. Even though Isabel had begged Levi to let me learn, the answer was always the same.

 _"No_."

 _"She's too young."_

 _"The gear is too heavy."_

 _"God damnit, I said no."_

 _"When you find a helmet and elbow pads then we'll talk."_

Sometimes it was a crushing blow. I had to sit at home, by myself for the majority part of the day. There wasn't much entertainment for someone my age. I couldn't even venture off with a story, since those black and white texts didn't make sense. I always had to wait for Levi for the books.

"Could you assist me in a favor, kiddo?" Farlan asked as he placed his gear on the floor. I instantly, yet carefully, put the cabals I had been cleaning back on the table. Levi had entrusted me with his equipment and I never did a poor job. I folded the cloth I was using and pushed in my chair, before doing a skip-like jump towards the blonde.

"Sure!" I asked egger to know what was in store for me. I starred up at him as he pulled a small pouch from his pocket. My eyes glistened at the sight of the money.

"Isabel and I are a little tired from today's work. Would you mind going to the market's stand and getting us some food for tonight?" I had to control my excitement.

"Yeah! It-it's the one with the bald man right?" I couldn't recall his name, but I remembered that shinny head. Farlan handed me the money. I neatly cradled the paper in my palm.

"That's the one. Now, just ask the owner for the usual, he'll understand."

"Ok!" I smiled as wide as ever. Farlan then placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Straight there and back. No talking with strangers and try to hurry before Levi gets home." He let out a small chuckle. I knew what he was implying.

"I will-!" I was about to leave when Farlan tapped me lightly on the head.

"Pinkie promise?"

I held out two crossed arms and two little digits, our signature agreement.

"Double pinkie promise!" I replied.

* * *

I trotted through the quiet town.

It felt good to stretch my legs. This was the first time Farlan had asked me to run an errand so far away from home. For the past weeks, I was allowed small bits of freedom. It was sort of like being on an invisible long leash, as Levi so rightfully reminded me. The farthest I was allowed was to give messages to the other group members.

Usually that was only a ten-minute stroll, if I was purposefully being sluggish.

I slowed as I neared a familiar building. There was always a crippled homeless woman there. She had her worn blankets underneath her and a grim look on her face. It bothered me that she never moved. Why didn't she want to walk around or jog somewhere? Why did she always sit?

I had asked Levi once, if she could stay with us, when we passed through here on our weekly trips. She looked like she needed help, just like how I was. The leader let out a 'tch'.

"The day I let that flea infested thing inside will be the day everyone gains free unauthorized citizenship to the surface."

I took that as a _no._

I didn't stare as I veered left. My limbs carried me another couple of feet when a commotion of yells and clanking of metal caught my attention. Normally, I would have kept to myself and ignored the noise. However, my gut was pulling me toward the alley in which the commotion was happening.

I slowly stalked my way to the edge of the brick wall. I could hear the struggle behind the cement. Fear gnawed at me as I listened.

"Give it here!"

"Ugly girl-stop fighting!"

The thudding of kicking shoes echoed against my ears. A girl's grunts and wails followed from every beating. I stood there frozen. My heart nearly exploded the more I heard the tussling behind my back.

 _What should I do?_

I felt the money in my pocket.

In a way it was a comfort, a reminder, of the job that was needed of me. I had an obligation to fulfill. My mind circled back to Farlan and Isabel, there needs, for once, was resting on my shoulders. With a mental sigh, I decided to head back on the path. Before I could even managed a step, a familiar voice cried out. Little prickles ate at my skin.

"No-stop! That's mine!" _Her_ voice danced through my memory. I barely had time to register what my body had done. There I stood, facing the aggressive assault. It was a challenge to distinguish exactly what was occurring amongst the chaos, the alley was horribly dark. The shadows were playing tricks. My vision wasn't exactly ideal for this situation either.

I had to squint long and hard.

Eventually, the voice I had recognized had a face, the face of my childhood friend and precious soul in my life. There she was, trying to hold her own against two older boys and a girl. It wasn't an equal fight in the least.

The assaulters had tools, weapons to use as brut force. The weak child only had her already battered fists and worn kicks on her side. I watched in disbelief as she wrestled with each member to the floor. The crumbs of leftover food would spill and cover the surface of the pavement.

I heard the repetitive sound of a wooden boards and metal poles whacking against her. Her face was beginning to show the trauma it had endured. Yet, she still held on to the remains of her food.

Another round of kicks and punches were launched in her direction. I listened to her wails as she struggled to keep going. Alone, the odds would never be in her favor.

"Fucking girl-just give up already!"

 _Smack!_

"You're about dead anyway-why bother to eat?"

 _Wham!_

A once hidden adrenaline now bubbled to the surface. I could feel the muscles in my body shoot waves of tension. Just like my father, I clench the sleeve of my left arm and rolled it up to my elbow. The fear drained into my legs, the shaking was visible. I had been in my fair share of fights and I knew from my past that when dealing with this particular bunch never resulted in anything short of annihilation.

"Bitch-give it here!"

 ** _Except-_**

"No!" My friend screamed. Her body was being stomped into the stone, like a crunchy beetle that had invaded the wrong home. That's what _we_ had become, nothing more than pests and easy targets for bigger individuals. _We_ had been reduced to the disgusting bugs of the underground.

Her frail arms clung to her bag.

 ** _I wouldn't be fighting alone._**

Like an animal, I lunge my full weight at the middleman. His back was turned, and wasn't expecting the impact from behind. Instantly, his legs buckled underneath him and we were sent toppling to the pavement. Being in street fights, there were no limits, no rules, on how to defeat your opponent. Simply aim and wail.

My fists blindly punched at his head. I could feel my boney knuckles colliding with his scalp. It didn't take him any time to cast me off like going overboard on a ship. I took the brutal impact. My cheek grazed the rocky surface but quickly I got to my knees. There were no breaks in a brawl.

Just as I did, the man who was once under me can at me at full speed. His hand was balled and struck me like a cannon in my gut. The pain halted my breathing. I didn't see the next punch, until it struck me in the chin. The blow exploded a wad of blood from within my mouth. The metallic liquid sat bitterly on my tongue.

"Have you not learned your lesson from before- _Milk eye?"_ The leader stood over me; his youthful teen face was covered in dirt and grim. His shaggy brunette hair nearly covered his eyes. One wouldn't have guessed he was strong, his lean body was false advertising.

His massive hand gripped the top of my collar. The fabric wrapped around the back of my neck and strangled in the front. My mouth curled into a wince. By now, the others had taken notice in the newcomer. Their attention was drawn away from the near lifeless girl on the ground. I knew I was about to meet the same fate.

"Holy shit- your face is disgusting!" The other smaller man said. His toothy grin haunted me as he burst into a laugh. The girl, known as Ducky, strutted up behind him, her banana-bobbed hair bounced along. Her pinkish freckled completion opposed her true vengeful personality.

"Doesn't seem much different than before-" She said coldly. The others chuckled at her comment. All of them were in cahoots with the devil himself. As if being pounded wasn't enough, their mouths always seemed to send additional abuse. Their street name, _Shit Talkers_ wasn't far fetched.

The smallest member, _Rock_ started to gab my right eye with his finger. He toyed with the amount of pressure. Each time he poked more painfully than the last. I wiggled against the hold the leader had on me. The soreness filled around my eye.

"Ah nasty, the veins feel like little dried up worms-" The kid snorted with excitement. They say his name came from his physic. He was broad, heavier, and low to the ground. However, others claim it resembled his lack of intelligence.

"Don't touch it, moron. You could catch it-" Ducky rolled her eyes as she slapped his hand away. The leader lifted his wooden plank board. One side had several rusty nails stuck out the back. I gritted my teeth, the nerves within me spiraled out of control.

"Maybe we should make that other eye match-?" The teen's expression grew with hysteria when he announced his sadistic ideas. Those green eyes showed no mercy. My stomach turned to a bottomless pit.

"Oh Bruno, you always make such a mess when you scar your victims. Ridiculous-" The girl let out a huff. "Besides, lets just grabbed the dough and leave. Don't need the MP showing up." The leader shrugged off her advice. I was all he was focused on.

"Fuck the Military Police, we can deal with them later. Besides-" The plank was moved slightly back behind his head. My heart nearly tore in half at the sight. I wanted to squeal and begged, expect my vision happen to drift to my friend. She had quietly gotten to her feet. She was lurking in the shadows; she was waiting for the moment. I swallowed the swollen lump in my throat.

 _I knew._

"This hideous creature needs to learn her place." The leader cackled. _Rock_ practically danced out of his ripped jeans. He clapped his hands and then ran them over his shaved head.

"Do it it-Do it!" He practically pleaded. Drool seeped past his lip. I cringed.

"Whatever-" Ducky said as she waved off the situation. The girl was about to turn around. My closed throat instantly opened. I couldn't let her see my friend. I let out a round of insults and screams. I fought back; my determination fueled me forward. Bruno wrestled me against the brick wall. I could feel my bones cracking under the weight. The blood from my earlier injury spilled from my busted lip. Though in pain, I got the result I wanted, all eyes were back on me.

"Fucking worthless gutter rat. No wonder your mommy abandoned you-who the hell would want a freak show like you-?" The leader yelled at me. His rancid breath spread over my face. The man's eyes were only inches from mine. Sometimes, stupidity is all it takes to get the message across.

I swished the mixture of saliva in my mouth before launching the diluted blood into his face. It wasn't any small amount either. His face twisted in anger.

"Bitch!" He screamed.

 **There was no reacting.**

 **No time to dodge.**

 **No regrets.**

The splintered blunt end of the board slammed into the left side of my head. A perfect shot across my other eye and over my check bone. I screamed in agony. I was unexpectedly able to grip my face and squeeze at the pain. After several moments, I was able to register the fight before me. Again, my friend was defending not only herself, but me as well. She kept taking the beatings. I was crouched over and hissed against the pulsing misery.

 _"If you've got nothing to lose. Then what's the worry? Why should you worry?" Dad said after he had thrown me to the ground. I was so young. Yet, it was so clear._

I was relentless this time.

I threw myself at them again. This go, I didn't stop. My hands were rounded into machine like weapons. I pounded into Ducky. She flared her arms and clawed to get me off. I then felt someone gabbing at my jacket, jumped from her back and leapt at the shorter man. I had never felt such aggression radiating through me.

It was as if I didn't feel anything.

Everything was numb, but the stamina and momentum it granted me was unbelievable. I threw a left hook square into his side. _Rock_ staggered back before I nailed him in the shin. I wouldn't stop. My knuckles soon collected specks of blood.

Back and forth I fought with Ducky and _Rock_. Each one had their rounds with me. We all ended up battered and marked. The exhaustion lingered in our heavy breaths. I wasn't going to quite, not now.

I had managed to leach onto Ducky's legs. She collapsed hard, smacking the ground with her elbows. She screamed as I climbed my way up her body. Street fights, we had no limits, no rules. I grabbed handfuls of her bright yellow hair and began yanking out chunks. The alley was full of shrieks and thuds.

I took another kick in my back. _Rock_ used all his strength to beat me near senseless into the stone floor. Somehow, I managed to push through his fist and into his gut. Again, I plastered another one down. We were all soaked in sweat, spit, and blood. Ducky joined and once more the three of us were trying to gain the upper hand. I was wearing down quickly. I was dueling with teens that were at least Levi's height but with more meat to them. No, they weren't missing any meals.

A pair of hands wrapped around my throat. The tight grasp was closing around my windpipe. My already blurry vision was fading in and out with blackness. I could see Ducky snarling at me. Her head had sores from the hair I had pulled out. I drifted to my friend. She too was in a pinch with Bruno.

"Just die already!" She growled, as her grip got stronger. I felt the fibers of my jacket, how the sleeves covered my skin. The feel of that coat-

I pushed my neck forward enough to reach her arm. My teeth did the work from there as they clamped down onto her exposed flesh. She let out a bloodcurdling scream as I chomped deeper. I could actually taste the thick muscle in her arm. Its rubbery substance met my taste buds. The liquid leaked from the wound. The bones in my face sunk further.

"Let go! No-no-stop it!" Ducky cried. _Rock,_ couldn't even get me off of her. No matter the punches or the threats, I wasn't letting go. They were going to have to smash all my teeth in. And even still, I could picture myself gnawing on her with my gums. Their days of running these streets were over. Losing our shelters and food was no longer going to come to either my friend or myself.

We weren't going to be crushed bugs.

"What the hell are you alley serpents up to?" A deep nasally voice bellowed. Everyone stiffened. The only sounds were our gasping lungs. "Hey-are-are you guys stealing again?" The anger from his voice roared. The sound of clanking metal followed his footsteps.

"Its-It's the MP!" Rock released his grip on me as he hollered. Bruno shoved the young girl from his hold.

"Scatter!" The leader announced. He and his other male member flew past the two Military officers. They didn't even hesitate to evacuate. Ducky was thrashing wildly. My jaw still was locked around her arm. I wasn't letting go. She threw a weak hit into my face before heaving all her weight back. The force was strong enough to allow her remaining skin to rip. The chunk of flesh dangled from my teeth.

She didn't even scream as she headed out of the alley and after her group. The officers made little effort to capture them. They stared. I scrunched up my face before spitting out the semi-appalling taste.

Small hands tugged at my arm.

I looked to see my lost friend hovering over me. She was gesturing me to move. I caught sight of the advancing men. The hits from earlier were slowly pinching my nerves.

"Hold it right there!" The second officer yelled.

Without saying a word, my friend and I allowed our legs to make the call. Like bullets, we zoomed out of their reaching hands. The streetlamps lit our path as we raced around the dreary town. I could hear the officers threating tones as they trailed behind us.

I wasn't sure why this sudden thrill was like a drug to me. The running, the being chase, it was exhilarating. My feet sped around corners, merchant stands, and under broken overpasses. We passed street roamers and nearly knocked several down. I jumped over rubble and spun out of tight spots, grant it as best as I could.

We ran for what seemed like hours.

Eventually, we veered near a run down shack. Its _Immigration_ sign was barely visible from all the debris and cobwebs. As I tagged along my friend led the way past the opening and into the main floor room. There, vacant seats covered in dust enticed us to take cover.

We snuggled tightly against each other as we hid behind one of the benches. The sound of fading boots finally allowed us to take a breath. A moment of silence escaped us before we each looked at one another and broke out in hushed laughs.

* * *

"So that's where you've been-" Amara sounded repulsed. For the last hour she and I had wrapped up our missing memories within record time. She explained her desperation when she tried to search for me. Her tone grew angry when she mentioned the gang we had encountered. Apparently, she hadn't had a decent meal since I left. Her time with the M.P wasn't pleasant and being chased by the unhappy merchants was a normal outing.

"Yes-" I replied quietly. Amara was nearly two years older than I was. She had a sour personality to anyone other than me. Though, you would have never guessed from her appearance. Her innocent blue eyes against her pale completion seemed more like a doll than a person. Even her dark chocolate hair, though long and untrimmed, framed her delicate face so innocently. To me, she was ideal beauty.

Amara scratched at her neck and chest.

"These stupid marks-" I watched as her nails dug at the maroon colored rings on her skin. Those blemishes had plagued her since we met. She never questioned my problem and I never mentioned hers. It was our mutual understanding.

"You're not going back to them are you-?" My friend's question was more like a statement. I rubbed my aching face. My feelings swirled inside of me.

"Uh, yeah-I mean-" I slightly drifted my voice. _Would I return?_

"You tell'n me you like being put on a chain? I never see you anymore!" Amara shouted. For once, it was probably a good thing I couldn't see her well. I'm sure her eyes were in the shapes of daggers. I pulled at my sleeves.

"Its-its not what you think." I whispered. "They're nice. They-they've given me my own bed, food, and medicine. They saved me. I told you that. " I didn't look at her. I pulled the jacket's bulky collar up around my neck.

"Sounds like that short one has ya pulled tight." Amara picked at her hand as she talked. I would have pinched my eyes together had they not been swollen.

"Levi-Sir isn't like that. He just has strict chores is all."

"Yeah, sounds like the ball and chain is the mop." My friend's sarcastic tone stabbed into me. _Maybe she was right?_ "Thanks by the way-"

Her unexpected change in voice caught me off guard, "Huh?"

"For helping earlier-thanks" She said. I nodded before wiping a trickle of blood from my lip.

"No problem. Sorry I couldn't do more." I heard her snort a chuckle.

"You're not much of a fighter. Never have been, dude."

She was right. Though I was taller than her, Amara could hold her own longer than I. Out of the two of us, she was the one always starting the fights. She didn't care if she came out a winner. I believe all that pent up rage just needed to get out sometimes.

We both sat and felt around our injuries. After a while, we concluded that neither of us was going to be able to walk the next day.

"Oh that reminds me!" Amara boasted with excitement. My attention turned to her when I heard the sound of a crinkling bag. My jaw nearly dropped.

"You still have it?"

Amara gleamed as she fiddled with the paper bag. "Yeah dude, I wasn't going to pass this treat up! Look-" My friend pulled out a palm size chocolate delicacy.

"Is that-?"

"Oh yea, tasty dark **chocolate** cake. Stolen from the master German baker himself." Amara's pride radiated from her voice. I couldn't blame her that was such a rare steal. My mouth nearly watered.

"Here ya go- everyone's gotta' have cake on there special day." She handed me the torn mushy slice. I looked at her in confusion before taking a bite.

"What do ya mean?" Amara smiled before elbowing me.

"Dude, its your birthday! Duh-"

* * *

I dragged my feet as I headed back.

My hands were empty and so was my pocket. A sick feeling was stirring in my stomach. I was sure; it wasn't from the cake either.

I had decided to give Amara the money. She had talked about her starvation so long that I couldn't leave without ensuring she had something for the next couple of days. Besides, my story seemed believable.

Just as I was about to head to the right, something halted me from going forward. I felt the neck of my jacket pulled into a tight ball. I let out a gasp at the unexpected action.

"You're in some knee-deep shit, brat."

I hunched my shoulders. The tension was so strong I wanted to ball up and die. I knew the choices I had made were possible candidates for punishments. Except, I was riding off Amara's words, _"just lie as always and don't get caught."_

"Get your ass moving-now!" Levi's voice threated as he shoved me forward. I didn't want to be in front. That meant I could only _feel_ his presence from behind. There was no getting a reading on his expression. _Maybe he wasn't that mad?_

* * *

Wow, was I wrong.

"Levi-Bro calm down!" Isabel did her best to defend my pathetic story. "You probably didn't see everything. Look at her-it probably was the M.P. You know how they are-!" I stood there frozen, mortified to the core. I had never seen him this enraged.

"Levi, listen-" Farlan laid a hand on his friend's shoulder, but only for a second before Levi smacked it away. He spun on his heal and faced me. The knife he was carrying was pointed in my direction from across the table.

"Don't you dare and try to justify the lies this brat is feeding you." Levi growled. I shrunk several inches at his words.

"Levi-Si-Sir" I whispered with fear spilling into my syllables. I heard a loud thud echo in the room. Levi's knife was speared through the table. His slate eyes narrowed at me. I pulled myself deeper in the jacket.

"Levi!" Farlan exclaimed in shock. Isabel was like me, speechless. The leader stood up straighter. His shoulders blocked my view.

"I refuse to have a distrusting snake lurking around here. Not to mention someone who scuffles in fights like some shitty stray animal. I will not tolerate such behavior, brat. I don't give a damn how old you are or your sap story." The tears began to fill from my painfully tender eyes. I choked a hard lump. My response was the same; I simply nodded with unmet eyes.

Levi made his way towards me. I could see his shoes on the ground. Then a rough hand jerked my face upwards.

"Look at me when I'm addressing you."

"Yes-yes Sir-" I squeaked. I slightly shook as he starred his icy gaze through me. All I could do, was wait for my punishment.

 _Was he going to hit me?_

 _Make me stand for countless hours?_

 _Abandon me?_

"Get your sorry ass to your room. No dinner and you sure as hell can forget any reading for the rest of the week." And with that, Levi pushed my chin away before heading to his personal space. The door slammed once he disappeared behind it.

I didn't say anything.

I went to my bed with eyes full of sorrow and relief.

I laid on the covers my face buried into the jacket. I wrapped myself tighter in its comforting fibers, as I sat and thought about several impossible things.

Happy birthday to me-

* * *

 **Levi's such a hypocrite, huh?**

 **What do you think? Should he punish Elke for being the rugged street thug she once was?**

 **Like, favorite, review (I always reply back).**

 **Special thanks again to** **Yami Rin** **for helping create the character "Amara". All credit goes to her for this amazing OC.**

 **Thanks again, to all those who are reading!**


	5. Märzen

***Warning contains some gore.**

 **Big paragraphs in italics are flashbacks.**

 **Also, did not have a chance to edit-will later.**

 **Der Rüpel**  
Chapter V:Märzen 

* * *

_Levi._

 _Levi, I know he's not bad, he's not guilty, he's misunderstood._

 _Levi, he's like me._

 _Can't you tell Levi?_

 _Levi just read between the lines._

 _I'm not bad._

My skull let out a deafening outcry as the bone was repeatedly slammed against the wall. The small rock fragments, from the bricks punctured my skin. The pain intensified the more I struggled. The more, I desperately tried to free myself against the sinister holds.

There was no holding back the tears.

No words of comfort, to shield me, us, from this horrible nightmare.

I heard the sobs from my friend, my dear other half, as she too was pinned next to me. Our choking breaths and pounding hearts matched. Even our bruised and bloody faces nearly looked identical. Though I wanted to cry for her, I pleaded for someone else.

"Dad! Daddy-Daddy please save me!" My quivering lips leaked an ounce of saliva. My wrists were twisted behind me. The frail cartilage in my arms strained as the aggressive hands held them. A handful caught an excessive amount of my hair. I whimpered as the strands were tugged roughly. My scalp grew inflamed as every thread was pulled to its limit. I was sure the skin was slowly being pealed away with it.

"Dad-!" I cried. Instantly, the man behind me crushed my frame harder against the stone. Tears overflowed my cheeks.

"Shut up! Fucking worthless trash." The grizzly male sneered. His body reeked of alcohol and sulfur. I hid my wrinkled sorrow face into the wall. My limbs shook from the rubber band tight nerves within me. My neck was craned at an odd angle. Strangely, pair of leather fingers traced my hairline and down my jaw. It sent my spine into a round of shivers.

"Now, boys-don't be so harsh with our treasures." The stout, lip-bearded man purred. I attempted to jerk away from his touch. The disguising leader laughed at my pathetic unwillingness. "Would have expected a bit more piss and vinegar from this one-after all she's _A.H's_. That damn fox thought he could sneak around us. Well-well guess who's victorious now. " He thumbed his finger over the raised scar on back on my head.

I wanted to die.

The fear that was once locked away was now bubbling to the surface. Its thick black liquid was consuming my sanity. I felt nauseous. My intensities twisted as if they were being kneaded into dough. I bit hard on my lip, hoping to stop the burning pain of the scratchy rope that was bounding my wrists.

Amara.

I heard her struggle.

I heard the pounds, the thrashing, and the stomping.

I heard the screams.

Amara, I thought to myself; this is entirely your fault.

If I had listened, if I had followed the rules, we wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here standing in this tormented moment. My heart wouldn't be racing nor would I be sick of the unpredictable future. No. I would be _home._ I would be tucked into my soft comforting bed, with thick blankets, and a story. My tea would have been long ago devoured and my stomach would be filled with a satisfying dinner.

My teeth chattered as I felt the rope being pulled into a knot. My mind filled with the memory that brought us here. Why hadn't I listened? My forehead scrapped down the bricks. Burry the pain, I told myself.

/

 _"_ _We're not bad are we?" I asked my question with a somewhat regretful tone. My arms were resting on my torn pants while my head hid in them. I couldn't face the world. I heard Amara ripping a piece off her loaf of bread. I cringed._ _ **Why were we like this?**_

 _"_ _What are you ramblin' on bout' now? All you've done the last couple of days is mope and talk about senseless things. The short guy hates you-get over it." Her words cut like a steak knife through hot butter. I felt queasy on the inside._

 _"_ _I know-sorry. It-Its just-" I sighed, "I didn't mean to break any rules. I was just doing what we use to do. It didn't seem wrong, it-" Amara interrupted me. Her sloppy chews were heard through her voice._

 _"_ _Look-fighting isn't wrong. It's a gift, dude. If you don't protect what's yours then how you ever gonna eat? I'm not gonna let someone take my food-" I raised my head and looked at her wide eyes with her 'duh' expression. I seemed to get that facial language a lot. She then rattled the bread in my face. "And don't bother arguing with me."_

 _"_ _Its just-when I talked to Farlan he told me, that Levi just didn't want me to end up a troublesome brat with a bad stain. Its like they're saying we're bad. What we've done is bad. Are we bad?" I asked. Amara rolled her eyes as far back as she could. She apparently had gotten in another scuffle. Her grey shirt and brown pants were nearly shredded. Not to mention, the countless bruises that covered her face and the protruding whelp on her cheek._

 _"_ _I'm not gonna sit here and listen to your garbage." My friend spat before jumping to her feet. I was convinced she didn't feel pain. My body was still stiff and I had to stagger to get up. I followed as usual, like a lost puppy. Amara the leader, slowed slightly but still looked ahead. "You know, its not like they're saints. You told me before they're thugs and are always runnin' from the police."_

 _I paused._

 _"_ _Yeah-I guess you're right." I said. Reality struck me. They were just as dirty and rotten as we were. "Nothin' more than flying gutter rats." I let out a chuckle. Our pace matched as we strolled down the street._

 _"_ _Whacha' mean flying?" Amara asked. I shrugged my shoulders._

 _"_ _They have that gear that pulls them through the air. It's kinda neat, actually. But-but I'm not allowed to use it. Mister Levi won't-" Amara shuffled in front of me. My tracks halted before I collided into her._

 _"_ _Keep talkin'! What gear? What's it look like? How do they use it-?" Amara was bombarding me with a list of questions. Again, I slightly shrugged. I felt bare without that comforting jacket. The long tope sleeves weren't the same._

 _"_ _I dunno. They're heavy, kind of shinny-" Amara gripped my shoulders and shook roughly._

 _"_ _That's not what I meant!" Her blue orbs burned into me. "Is that how they've been stealing so good? That how they're escapin' the MP?" I pulled at the sleeves near my wrists._

 _"_ _Yea-yea, they usually go out early and are gone for most of the day-"_

 _"_ _Are they home at night?" Amara pressed._

 _"_ _Uh yea, that's-that's when Mister Levi would read to me. His books are really-" My friend shook me again. I could feel my brain being tossed back and forth. The pressure in my face had yet to drain; the pain radiated._

 _"_ _No one cares 'bout your stupid books! Listen, Elke! We have a chance here. What's it called-?" Amara paused, "An-an op-opportunity. Yeah, an opportunity to rule the streets, we can finally be top dogs. No more getting' caught. No more havin' to get beaten up or give up our food! We can fly to the highest roof and never come down! Don't you see? We can live in paradise! Maybe even escape to the surface-" Amara's face lit up at all the possibilities. Her hold on me loosened as her thoughts traveled._

 _I stared at her. Something deep and low in my gut was twisting. I couldn't voice it. I just new this feeling of pins and pulling of strings in there wasn't good. A tightness in my chest tugged near my heart. Something wasn't settling well with me._

 _"_ _But Amara, we don't have any flying gear-" I started to say but was cut off._

 _"_ _Duh, dummy. We don't have a food cart either, but that hasn't stopped us from getting what we want." Amara lightly punched me in the shoulder. A smirk stretched up into her cheeks._

 _"_ _You don't mean-" I wined as the imaginary nail jabbed my insides. My brown eye pleaded with her. I knew what she was implying before she even spoke. She let out a snort as she stared slightly up at me._

 _"_ _Don't give me that look- we're not doing it during the day. We'll be smarter. We'll steal'em at night." Amara smiled as she faced the path to the house. The streetlights this evening didn't shine as bright._

 ** _The red blistering rings had crept up to her jawline._**

 ** _/_**

"Stop squirming rat!" The grungy man yelled. His spit flew into my face as I flung my head in all directions. The cloth was becoming embedded into my cheeks. Irritated blisters were forming, as the fabric was pulled harder. My tongue had to endure the awful taste of the stained grease that had lingered on the rag. I gagged. The fumes of gasoline intoxicated my senses.

I tried to scream.

I wanted to call out to someone, anyone who would spare me a horrible **death.**  
Frayed fabric sawed in between my teeth. I wormed and groaned with desperation. The fear wouldn't allow me to think past that dreaded thought of **dying.**

 _He would come for me._

 _Soak me up in his dark cloak then eat away at my decaying body._

 _Just like Daddy said._

"I said enough!" The man yelled his threat. However, he also enforced it. I heard the loud snap before the throbbing agony engulfed my wrist. My eyes shut with blinded tears and even against the cloth I managed a powerful lung-filled shriek. "Quiet your damn crying! Stop it!"

But I couldn't.

My muscles trembled more as my limp detached wrist flopped against the rope. I kicked my legs out and threw a tantrum. Even as I was wrestled back into a tight hold, I fought. I wouldn't be taken. The door to the cargo transportation was open. Its dark unfilled area was haunting. As if a monster lurked in there, waiting to gobble me whole. Panic gripped my lungs.

"Easy with the treasures, boys. Can't have them too mangled, otherwise they won't fetch a hefty price on the surface. After all, just because they're test subjects doesn't mean they shouldn't be handled without care." The man of authority thundered another deep belly laugh. His mustache crinkled under his beak nose. Those squinty eyes held no mercy.

"What should we do with this gear, Sir? Ditch it-?" A nasally merchant member asked. The boss let out a sigh, his patients was thinning. He turned to his worker who stood adjacent to Amara and her handler.

"Don't be stupid, we'll sell it. Fucking idiot." The headman rolled his eyes. "Load it. And start throwing them in too- I don't want a crowd."

I could hear Amara fighting. Her aggression and fear was making her difficult to handle. The man kept threating her. Yet, Amara wouldn't listen. Her mind was controlling her actions. If I hadn't been struggling with my own battle, I might have saw, I might have stopped her before it escaladed.

 **Sadly, it was too late.**

I stood trembling in shock.

My eyes watered and yet they never spilled over. It was as though the time surrounding me froze. Everything was a blur, a white out of disbelief. I wasn't even sure my heart had a pulse. The only sound that rang was the gurgling of Amara's leaking lips. The scarlet liquid dribbled out of her. However, it wasn't registering with me, what was it? _What was that rusty fluid?_

I heard another thrust.

Another grunting jab enter her body. I watched the knife disappear and then come back with that same metallic red stain all over it. _What was it?_ The copper scent captured my nose. It swirled inside and tickled my senses. I felt myself backing away from the horrific scene. My body rammed against the man holding me. His grip was deadly, except I could barely feel it. I was numb to the core.

"You idiot! I fucking told you to hold your goddamn temper! Shit-look at the fucking mess you made." The leader cursed as he headed towards the cargo carriage. I didn't see him motioning to the other members. "Finish it-at least the body might be worth something."

I didn't even have a moment to flinch.

A spray of red misted covered my face and neck. My bruised skin was now layered with a wet spotted fluid. Still I stood, with bulging eyes and unresponsive reactions. Amara's petite body collapsed at my feet. Her expression stoned with bewilderment. Her once shinny brunette hair was matted and swirling around the crimson pool. A massive black hole was drilled deep between her eyes. Those wild blue eyes, no longer held the glint of life.

Her lips were stuck open and acted like a fountain as that unfamiliar liquid drained. Against the cloth, I mustered a whimpering cry. The gap in my mouth whistled as my rapid breathing returned. The fear had lite up in me again. The hands behind me hoisted me higher. My feet dangled over my dear friend.

Being carried shocked me back into reality. All at once, the feelings flooded my nerves. Those little receptors fired off like explosion. The memories pounded my head. The recognition of blood caused the nausea to return. I spit up my insides as I was being pulled away from her, from Amara.

I pleaded, I begged, I screamed for my friend.

But there she stayed, unmoving as I called for her.

The tears finally came as the arms strangled around me. I bit the fabric and pulled against the rope. The doors to the carriage were closer. The darkness smiled like the evil demon of **Death.** It's black hands wanted me; they were coming for me. If only I had listened.

 _Remember you're not bad._

Remember?

There was no reason to steal, no reason to hunger for something more, you had all you needed.

 **You had everything.**

 _/_

 _I sat at the wooden table._

 _My hand nearly touched the hollow hole where Levi's knife had impaled it. The sickness from yesterday was filing in me like a broken damn. I was already breaking rules. Nearly a week after the fight, clear boundaries had been set._

 ** _"_** ** _If you're caught even glancing at that blue eyed runt, you might as well jump off the tallest damn building here. Since, your ass won't be alive once I find you-"_**

 _That was Levi's most emphasized rule out of the countless others he had rattled off to me the following day. How could I though?_

 _How could I not see her, my best friend?_

 _Amara meant everything to me. She was my other half, the light in the dark room, the decision maker, the risk taker, the icing to a distasteful meal. That blue-eye-runt was my world. Her shoulder was there for tears, her hands were outreached to pull me up, her words of encouragement kept me going._

 _Amara._

 _The girl, who suffered with me, never left my side._

 _And now, she's finally called upon me for help. My throat dried up at the thoughts. And now all I could do was wavier in my decision. My fingers ran through my hair and over a raised scar on the side of my scalp. I lightly traced the abnormal skin._

 ** _I remember, dad._**

 _"_ _Hey-" A voice woke me from my thoughts. I glanced up to see Farlan standing over me. He looked empty as his eyes roamed to my plate. There sat an untouched meal. The bread and watered down soup still remained how they were prepared. The baked dough on the tin circular dish while, the now cold soup didn't stir and sat well to the rim._

 _Farlan laid a hand to my forehead. "You feeling ok, kiddo?" My head turned away from him. I pulled my arms from the table and placed them in the lap of my black pants. I shook my head._

 _"_ _Am-am I bad?" I asked in a hush voice. I could hear my caretaker hesitate then he let out a sigh as he crouched next to me._

 _"_ _No-and why would you ask such a thing?" Farlan replied. I shrugged as I twiddled with my thumbs._

 _"_ _Because, Mister Levi said I was stained. I did wrong. I am bad-" I stopped. My shoulders were tense until a warm hand tapped my cheek. That familiar gesture brought back a comfort. Words were hardly needed between us. Farlan and I had our own secret language. A small tear had spilled as I looked at him._

 _"_ _You know kiddo, sometimes Levi just has a hard way of communicating. He doesn't understand his choice of words can be so-so hurtful. All he knows is he wants the best for those he cares about-" Farlan wiped the droplet away. I grabbed a lock of hair and pulled at the ends. I sighed a painful breath._

 _"_ _Yea, but he only likes you and Isabel. He's never mean to you guys-"_

 _Farlan laughed, "He calls Isabel an idiot all the time. And I've had my few rounds with Levi when we first met."_

 _I remained silent._

 _"_ _Alright-" Farlan stood up from his position. I felt him lean his weight into the back of the chair. His one arm rested near my head. "I know I shouldn't say anything, Levi would be embarrassed, but I think you have the right to know."_

 _I waited. I didn't bother to look behind me. I figured what I was about to hear would just be another slap of more hurtful words. He leaned toward my left ear. I could smell exquisite aroma. He always smelled of fresh baked goods, as if they had just been pulled from an oven. The scent sent me back to times with Mom's spontaneous late night cookie cravings._

 _"_ _When you're not around, all Levi ever does is talk about you." Farlan paused when I spun my head in his direction. My eyes were as wide as saucers, even against the swelling. I focused intensely with my good eye._

 _"_ _He-he does?" I asked in amazement. Farlan smiled as he nodded._

 _"_ _Oh yea, I barely can say something about my day without being interrupted about an event with you. Levi is constantly boasts about his_ _ **damn good cleaner**_ _. He enjoys reading to you and hearing your opinions. Not to mention, he likes your curiosity for learning and drive for perfection. Yeah, in Levi's world, you're the perfect kid."_

 _I sat there in complete awe._

 _Farlan ruffled my hair, "So-don't worry about his ranting. Enjoy it. It means he cares about you." Before my caretaker could leave, I jumped from my chair and wrapped my small arms around his lower torso. I hugged him preciously. The hatred, the sickness had drained from my heart. A new enchanting warmth filled within me._

 _"_ _I'm sorry about the money, I'm sorry for not bringing home the food, and I'm-I'm sorry for fighting. I'm so sorry- sorry for everything-" I buried my face into his clothes. Farlan did as a reliable caretaker would; he leaned down and hugged me back. His strong limbs engulfed me._

 _Getting on his knee he embraced me into a tighter hold. We stayed together for several moments before he gently pulled me back._

 _"_ _Remember the day, we decided to take you in? The day we took a break from looking for your dad and you became a member here? Do you remember that day, Elke?" Farlan asked. I nodded._

 _"_ _I have never regretted a moment of it. You've been such a joy, Elke. You've come so far. I'm-we're all so proud. You're a special person-you're going to do great things, kiddo."_

 _"_ _You think so?" I asked with more confidence. A smile pulled at the corner of my mouth. Farlan crossed his arms and held out two pinkies._  
 _"_ _I'll even double swear to it."_

 _I exploded with a full mouth of teeth. My heart leapt at those words and as our smaller fingers locked I nearly flew with happiness._

 _"_ _Oh boy-looks like someone needs a tooth pulling." Farlan let out a chuckle. I raised a brow before my tongue wiggled a bottom tooth._

 _"_ _Someone's growing up quickly-"_

 _/_

My feet were in the shadows of the cargo. The cold damp box was sucking me in. No matter the effort, no matter the fight, I was defenseless against the Lord himself. I had to accept dying and stiffening in that hole. Dad was right; you don't trust people.

I closed my eyes.

I didn't want to see the lights from the city to be closed. I didn't want to see the image of my friend being forever shut. A salty tear dripped to my tongue. Why hadn't I listened? There was no need to steal. I wasn't bad.

Suddenly, I felt myself collide with the ground. My contorted body took a hit as I smacked the pavement with my chin. The bones around my chest roared with discomfort. I ignored the pains and managed to get enough strength to crawl. My clothes would have to endure the burn.

The scuffling behind me only fueled me to move fast. My raw jaw pulled me forward inch by inch. I scooted my torso across the bumpy ground. I would claw through the earth with my teeth, if it meant freedom. The clanking of metal and the sounds of fired arms spurred me again. My heart leapt at every noise, I never knew if the next moment would be my last. I didn't know if I too, would end up with a hole in between my eyes. Would it hurt? How quick would the lights go out?

With grinding shoulders I managed another sluggish crawl before I heard the sound of approaching footsteps. Then the sound-shattering chime of a fallen tool interrupted my ambition. My semi-bleeding lips mumbled a few prayers. I hid behind the draping of my bangs.

My heart stopped when smooth cold fingers lightly touched my neck. They lingered there for a moment, before the presence behind me scooped me into their arms. I trembled into a near stroke. Then I saw the black threads and steal eyes. It was as if the dark cloud vanished.

My eyes once again, filled with water. Except, it was relief that washed over me. I shoved my head into my caretaker's chest. Even with bound hands and redistricted mouth I let myself grieve on my angel.

"Shhh-I've got you. It's alright-brat-alright shhh-" Levi's words were barely heard over my relentless cries. I shook in his hold. I soaked his clothes and dug deeper into him. I never wanted to leave his reassurance.

Levi didn't fuss over his attire or the endless sobs that filled the air. He stroked my hair and remained quiet. After a few moments, he let me sit in his lap as he untied the rope and gentle removed the fabric from my cheeks. I saw how bloody the rag was before Levi tossed it away. I didn't look at him as he tried examined my injured wrist.

"You-You're right Sir-" I mumbled my sadness, "You're right-I'm bad. I'm bad. I'm-" Levi pulled me closer to him. I inhaled his spicy warm scent. His hands held my shaking shoulders.

"No-no-shhh. We're not going to discuss that. Not now. No-you're not bad, kid." His velvet voice passed through me and against the silent street. I pinched my brows as another round of cries escaped me.

"I never meant to be bad." I sobbed. "I didn't mean to steal. I didn't want to be troublesome. I didn't-I didn't- Amara-" The waterfalls poured. Levi held me tighter as he got to his feet. He supported my weak body.

"I know-" Levi said bluntly as he turned in the direction of home. Over his shoulder I could see my friend. Her beautiful face lost in the deep crimson pool. I pulled on the fabric of Levi's shoulders. My heartstrings were still connected to Amara, my dear friend.

"No-no-no we can't, we can't leave her!" I screamed with blurry eyes. Levi pulled me back down as he continued. The distance between my friend was growing. Her figure was becoming a shadow, a lost form. "Sir-Sir please-please we can't leave her! She needs to come home! She needs to come home-" My voice drowned in my grief. Levi shifted my weight from his shoulder and carried me lower.

"There's nothing we can do. She's dead." Levi said. He pried my hands from his collar and situated me so my head once again rested against his chest. My legs hung over his arms. I didn't want to believe him. I wouldn't believe him.

I wrestled myself from his hold.

"Elke!" I heard Levi holler. With stumbling legs I fought back to my friend. My knees buckled as I stood over her body. I let my pants soak up her vital fluid. There she remained, stomach flat on the ground, with open eyes, and a hole in her head. I trembled at the sight.

"Amara-Amara please-please get up." I pulled on her shirt. Again, no response came from her. I wanted to see her chest rise. I wanted to hear a groan, a mutter of annoyance. I wanted her to slap me away and tell me she was just resting. But there she lay. Frustration grew with in.

"Get up! Get up! We've got to go-Amara we've got to go home!" I screamed at her and shoved her body. My hands splashed in the blood as I hit my fists on the ground. "It's your fault! It was your idea-you said- you said it was simple! That we would take the stuff and leave. You said-things would be better. You said we would never get caught!" I wilted over my dear friend.

My painfully filled lungs let out moans of despair.

"You lied-you were wrong. Amara we were bad." I choked. My head rested on her solid stiff back. She had never felt so empty. Amara, my world has been broken, shattered into unfixable fragments. She had a physical hole; I had an invisible one in my heart that would never heal.

A pair of lean arms grabbed my waist.

I thrashed against the restraint.

"No-no! I'm not leaving her! I'm not leaving her! Amara!" I pleaded as Levi swallowed me in his grasp. I heard the cables and the pull of the trigger. The wind caught my hair as we glided over the city.

I looked over his shoulder.

The tears floated through the air.

"Don't bother looking back-" Levi stated. Another cable reached for building. "She's not coming back." With sorrow and regret I tucked my head into my rescuer.

* * *

"Hey kiddo-"

I could hear Farlan's voice but the deadened nerves refused to make sense off it all. They told me it was 12:47 am, exactly, an hour after the tragic occurrence. Levi had brought me to my room. That's when the entire story unraveled from the other caretakers. I had listened, as they told Levi from outside the door, about Amara and I stealing the 3DM Gear.

I had listened as they relived the moment for me.

I listened and each time my throat splintered a bit more.

My mind unfortunately reeled back to that hour. I remember she and I struggling to carry the one piece of equipment out the window and down the street. We had been seen by Isabel but were _sadly,_ quick enough to cover our tracks.

I swallowed the lump.

That's when, my mind flashed the image, those merchants saw us and decided to gain some extra cash for the evening. At first, they were going to sell us as mere slaves. That was until my eye drew the attention. And from there, everything turned muddy.

 _It was my fault._

I shook on the bed. My eyes again, glassed over with distraught emotions. I couldn't hold back the dreaded cloud that hung over me. The guilt had wrapped itself tight around my organs; it was squeezing the life out of me. The pulsing pain within my wrist was only adding to the torment I was enduring. _Why wouldn't it stop?_

"Hey-hey-Elke. Elke it's alright-hey kiddo don't blame yourself-" Farlan's words were making it worse. I feverish damp sweat coated my back. My forehead felt hot and my stomach went queasy. I choked down the emotions but they weren't stopping. Unexpectedly, I was yanked from my spot on the bed, dragged out of the room, and tossed at the toilet.

I didn't resist puking every last regret in my intestines.

Levi allowed me a moment and quietly shut the door.

* * *

The ticking clock reminded me of the gunfire.

It was haunting me as I tired to sleep.

Isabel and Farlan had offered to stay with me, but I remained silent, which they assumed meant I wasn't interested. Everyone had long since gone to bed. Their undisturbed snores were making me jealous. _Why couldn't I have that?_

The bed creaked and moaned the more I tossed. My wrist was beyond inflamed. Levi had supported it as best he could, yet the bone still shifted against the wooden planks. I sniffled as more tears rolled down my cheeks.

Amara.

I could see her in my dreams.  
She stalked my thoughts.  
She invaded my vision.

Yes, I could see her dead corpse just lying here or there. The blood might have been washed from my face and my clothes had been changed. However, there was no forgetting the past. I couldn't push it out of my mind. Her presence, whether it was real or not, was scaring me.

I knew Amara wouldn't want to be alone.  
I knew she needed me. She was still out there.

A blanket, yes, a blanket would comfort her. They comforted me. Yes, she needed a blanket and a hug. She needed my warmth.

I had crept from my room to the main area. I hurt and was exhausted but I carried that blanket across the floor. I would drag it through mud and through driving winds if it meant my friend would be comfortable.

My hand reached for the handle.

"Elke-" A voice hesitated my actions. My fingers slightly curled back. "She's dead, Elke. Let it go." My shoulders heaved at his words. I clutched the blanket with my left hand. I shook my head.

"No Sir-you-you doesn't understand. Amara needs this. She needs warmth-its-its cold outside." My words trembled as I faced Levi. He was standing near the table with crossed arms. When I was about to turn back, a hand rested on my head. I hadn't heard Levi until he was there. I felt his strong presence behind me. His fingers barely disturbed my hair.  
"Let _her_ go. She's resting, Elke." Levi whispered. He hardly ever used my name, which his choice of words only made me sob more. He reminded me of dad, the man whom I haven't seen in months. The sudden realization hit me.

"I'm alone. I'm all alone-" I cried. I let the blanket fall to the ground then my knees. I didn't control anything. I bashed my palms into the floor and yanked my hair. I screamed and nearly threw up again. I had to get it out. Those feelings were bottled deep. I kept pounding the ground and as I did the split was coming loose. The bone made little pops as I flew my flustered self around.

Levi eventually managed to pull me up. Like before, hoisted me into his hold. I wrapped my arms around him tightly. The tears leaked down his collar.

"Woah, everything alright?" Farlan asked nearly half awake. Isabel followed with sleepy eyes.

"What's going on? Whats wrong?"

Levi ignored their questions and carried me passed them. He hesitated before opening his bedroom door.

"Hand me that left over swig of **beer** -"

With drowsy eyes and a bittersweet tongue I laid next to Levi. My muscles were relaxed as he quietly read our story. I had worked up the courage to rest my head near his side. I was more than relieved, when he allowed me to snuggle near him. Never, had I been more content in my life.

I would listen for a moment then drift off.

Then my attention would return to him.

I was fighting sleep.

I heard a page flip. "Close your eyes." Levi said in-between his narrative voice. I slightly looked up at him. His gaze remained on the book. "You have your jacket now, your shield. Nothing will harm you."

I swallowed. The sour liquor washed around my mouth.

"I have to think of impossible things-Sir." I said. Levi nodded though his interest elsewhere. "My eye wouldn't look this way-" I started. I felt Levi stiffen. Yet, I continued.

"I'll-I'll see Amara again." It was hard to get out. I took a breath then said my final thought. "And that you would be my _dad_." I whispered the last part.

My head lowered back down. My good hand pressed against Levi's clothes as I curled myself into him. I felt his beating pulse and I smelled his scent.

Just as I was about to drift off, a blanket was pulled up around me.

"You've had way too much liquor, brat."

* * *

 **Well, that's the chapter.**

 **So many emotions! Anyway, thanks for hanging in there with me-I had originally had this entire 15-page chapter written out a week ago. But there just wasn't enough Levi.**

 **So I made it better.**

 **To clarify: Amara had talked Elke into stealing the 3DM Gear. As they were escaping with the tool they were noticed by merchants who, captured them and were going to sell them for profit. Amara was stabbed and shot because of her actions.**

 **With that being said…this is the last chapter UNTIL possibly December. Depending on whether readers are enjoying the story will decide if it should be continued.**

 **Like, favorite, review…keeps author's inspired.**

 **Thanks everyone!**


	6. Träume

I dreamed a **dream** …

 _Amara…_

"Amara?" I asked. My eyebrows pinched together. I stared dumbfounded at her innocent expression. Those blue orbs softly looked at me. Her alabaster skin glistened like watered down ice under an unfamiliar sun. Except, time felt as though we had been here forever.

"Common Elke! What are you waiting for?" My friend tugged my arm and then instantly darted through sprouting greens. The sunlight feed the thick roots of trees and blossoming of pearly flowers. I had never seen such a fantasy.

However, it seemed as though nothing had changed.

"What are you waiting for? Common, Elke!" Amara called my name. The wind carried her vibrations voice. A small fuzzy yellow and black bug zoomed around me. It's small body landed on a flower. Suddenly, the wilting plant sprung back to life. Its petals were more radiant than before.

"Common!" Amara beckoned me.

I looked to see her petite figure dancing gracefully on a miniature hill. Her once tethered clothes were replaced with silky royal blue dress. A violet colored ribbon twirled within the locks of her chocolate hair.

Her soul bounding energy pulled me forward.

With eager legs, I ran towards her. My heart leapt at every bouncy step I took. I could feel my effortless muscles carrying me, as if I were flying. The ticklish plants touched me as I ran by; they were gracing me with encouragement. I reached her without an exhausted breath.

A beautiful enchanting smile spread across Amara's face. Her teeth were no longer stained, her lips were rosy, and her ringed tainted skin looked smooth and polished. I was in awe.

"Amara-Amara you-you-" I stuttered. I wasn't sure what to say. Was she not aware of her physical state? Had she not seen the angel she had become? Amara, my dear friend, do you not see the light that's encircling you and enticing me?

Amara interpreted my thoughts, "you've changed too, Elke."

I didn't have time to question.

A thin red line gradually appeared around her throat. It started faintly then grew thickly. However, Amara kept her steady smile. The air around us cooled drastically.

"What's-what happened to your neck?" I asked. I walked towards her and touched her warm fluidly skin. Her neck immediately spewed a red syrupy liquid. My fingers jerked away. Horror crossed my face. "Amara-?" I nervously questioned. A dry lump formed.

"It's alright-things happen. People change. They change, Elke," Amara said. Her smile soon filled with that staining liquid. Her teeth were coated. Those pearly whites were consumed by that wretched metallically substance.

I watched as the skin around her neck began to separate. Those tiny fibers were losing their hold. The tissue underneath soon appear.

The smile remained.

"Amara! No-no-no," I pleaded. My body trembled at the sight of my friend's unraveling neck.

Soon the space around us became smeared. The colors blended together like mud and dripped down the sides of my vision. Uncertainty filled within me. The ground's life faded.

A chill ran over me.

My eyes caught glimpses of the wilting flowers. The tree's well-nourished trunks were now shriveled. The colors never died instead, they continued to seep. They pooled around my shoes. Greens, blues, reds, oranges, and pinks kept leaking to the ground, as though they never ran out of juice.

My ears picked up a faint buzz.

"People change. You've changed," Amara said.

My eyes starred at the horrific sight. There, in the moment of draining time, was my friend being cradled by a monstrous beast. I watched in shear terror as the opaque figure ripped into my dear friend. Her cheerful doll like face hung over the arms of her attacker. Unsharpened teeth tore into her flesh. The dress's fabric lay shredded over her stiff body.

My insides turned.

A sweat broke over the back of my neck and down my spine.

My own hand shot over my mouth.

"St-stop-stop." I tenderly choked. Tears pricked my eyes.

The hideous creature looked up from its meal. Its mouth aggressively chewed the mouthfuls of colorful organs. A drip of drool leaked from its satisfied jaw. My own tongue even began to taste the vital fluid.

I wanted to hurl at the disgusting sight.

Amara didn't seem bothered. Her body remained composed and relaxed even as another snap of flesh was ripped from her torso. Her grin and eyes were still open. No hint of pain threated her face. Like doll, she stayed positioned just so.

"Amara-!" I tried to yell. My throat closed at sudden onset taste of blood. I touched my lips. My fingers revealed the crimson stain. I let out a gasp.

"It's alright, friend. You've changed. People change."

I felt a heavy weight in my arms. I looked down to the mangled body of my cherished friend. Her stomach was hollow with only bits of intestines and other organs. Parts of her ribs poked from her sides. Her dress barely held its blue hue.

"Oh gosh-Amara-Amara." I sobbed, "no-Amara please. Please don't do this-no-" The tears dripped from my cheeks. I sat there shaking as I held her, once more. The reality was too great. Her blood filled my nostrils.

The sensation sent a thrill through me.

Even my mouth began to water.

 _No, please no,_ I thought to myself.

I struggled; I had to resist against the _temptation_.

"What-what's happening to me?" I cried with shaking shoulders. My mouth waded with sticky saliva. My tongue swerved back and forth like a snake on the hunt. My stomach growled, its demands raged against my protests.

A gentle hand tangled within my hair. Then I felt a finger lightly pass around the edge of my mouth. I sucked gasps of air. My eyes were drowning in tears.

"Appetizing huh?" Amara chuckled.

I shook my head.

" _You're going to do great things, kid."_ Amara whispered in a different voice.

I froze.

I watched as she pulled the purple ribbon from her hair. The treasured tie was soaked from her blood. My friend lifted it towards my face, near my craving tongue.

"Don't resist."

I closed my eyes and allowed the thread to be pulled across my taste buds. The flavor, oh how I savored it. My right eye pulsed. I could feel the veins around the shaded iris wiggle with excitement.

"People change, Elke. You've changed," Amara drifted her words.

I screamed as her body disintegrated in my arms.

I dreamed a **dream** …

* * *

 **Hello readers!**

 **Yes, I've decided to continue with the story. Everyone was so supportive and encouraging that I just couldn't leave anyone hanging (well those who are liking the story).**

 **With that said, you probably are all wondering…what the heck is going on?**

 **All right, I'll explain.**

 **From this point forward, there will be separate "mini-chapters" dedicated to symbolic moments and foreshadowing of events. I want these to be separate since, they are so important to the plot. I don't want readers forgetting the goods.**

 **I totally came up with this idea while being bed ridden. Figures have a major cold with the start of the snow season. Ugh. But great time for inspiration!**

 **Chapter "6" will be posted either before Dec or right on the mark. Still working on it.**

 **I do want to take a second and apologize for the confusing and poor editing skills from the previous chapters. I have classes all day long; I am an artist and draw about 95% of my free time. So when I have a moment, I write. Explains the "no time to edit". I do apologize makes the reading challenging. But thanks everyone who has over looked that. You guys rock!**

 **Challenge- If anyone can guess the hidden clues (correctly) you can have a personal OC of yours appear in the story, if you want to. Thought readers would like the interaction.**

 **Keep it real peeps!**

 **~Enked**


	7. Schwarzwurst

**Der Rüpel**  
Chapter VI: Schwarzwurst

* * *

My body shot up from the covers.

I panted heavily as the sweat dripped from my brow. I ran my hands over my damp face and through my hair. My fingers brushed the back of my head, where that raised scar rested.

I swallowed roughly.

That nightmare haunted my sleep since the event. Amara's death, I wasn't taking it lightly. The past two nights, Levi had to wake me from my dreams, even though he allowed me to share his bed. I couldn't shake the guilt, the memories.

 _I was on my own._

"Get up. You're late for your chores, brat," Levi said unexpectedly. I looked at the door opening to see a non-to pleased man. His arms were crossed and I could hear the drumming of impatient fingers.

I nodded, "Yes, Sir." I shifted the covers.

"Tch, make sure you don't get any oil on the table this time. Took a shit load of effort to-"

I forcefully interrupted my superior, "I-I want to see her."

I heard Levi's uncomfortable silence.

"Please, Sir."

Levi sighed a deep breath, "I don't believe in revisiting the dead. She's gone. What's done is done." I licked my lips before I stared into his cold eyes.

"I-I don't believe it, Sir. There-there are things I need to say. Please, Sir. She's-Amara is my best friend. I would have died without her, " I said as directly as I could. Still, I was unsure about pressing Levi. I clutched the blankets.

"No."

I choked a few tears, "I-I just want to say good-bye."

* * *

"Are you sure about this, Levi? I mean we are talking about a child seeing a dead body. Just saying it seems-"

"There's _nothing_ you can say to change the memories she saw. The brat's seen death. No point in restricting the reality of the shitty world, now."

I listened from the other room as my caretakers bickered about the situation. Isabel was also against me seeing my friend. For once, Levi was on my side. Eventually, I emerged from my old bedroom. The squeaky floor and my raspy breaths gave away my hidden figure.

"The rule is still in effect, brat. Patch now," Levi commanded. My head drifted from his intense gaze. My hand fished inside the jacket's pocket.

"She doesn't need that Levi-Bro. No ones going to-" Isabel's contradiction was cut short. Levi made his way towards me.

"I'm not taking anymore chances. That damn thing is going to be hidden."

I stood quietly as Levi pulled the strings tightly. The black patch covered my eye. Levi didn't realize the humility in this. He didn't understand the hurtful feelings this _cover up_ caused me. I didn't want to be different. In my mind, this singled me out.

The rule was stated two days ago.

 _In the presence of others, indoors or out, I was to wear the eye patch. I was not to be seen without it basically, until bed._

I heard the final pull. My lungs let out a slight sigh.

"Now, you may proceed."

* * *

My face was hidden in Isabel's clothes. I was instructed to wait until a sheet could cover her body. And as expected, I did as I was told. Together Isabel and I stood. She let me hug her through the entire moment.

"Alright," Farlan huffed. He still had not accepted the idea.

I gave Isabel a final squeeze before I slowly pulled away. Mentally, I braced myself. Though, I had relived the event and dreamt nightmarish thoughts, nothing compared to stepping back into the scene. My heartbeat elevated.

A hand rested on my shoulder.

I looked to see Levi. He nodded. His permission, his encouragement, gave me bits of strength. Nevertheless, I resembled a nervous mouse. I would take a step, then flinch, then I would take another and stop. My jaw tightened. The scent of old blood pierced my nose.

I spun my head around. My trio of caretakers stood watch. I gulped the nerves and continued. As I neared, I saw the corpse. The red stain on the concrete wasn't completely gone. I cradled my injured wrist. I toyed with the splint, even against the pain. Finally, I surrendered to the tension and dropped to my knees.

I couldn't see her beautiful face.

My eyes scanned over the lumpy sheet. Spots of red could be seen trying to bleed through. I let out a shaky sigh. Then with a bowed head, I pulled the beige feather from my inside pocket. Earlier, I had tied a small pebble to the end. The rock's red and brown hue blended well with the ground. It was difficult to swallow the entire scenario. There was my dear friend, frozen, lifeless, while I kneeled over her with a beating heart and caretakers who watched over me.

Amara, never experienced _love_.

"I'm-I'm so sorry, Amara. Amara I'm sorry," I tearfully said. A trembling hand lifted the sheet and placed the feather inside her pant pocket. I lay the cover back down, "There, now you can fly."

I let the emotions run down my cheeks.

"Elke, common lets go," Farlan said. His presence shadowed behind me. I, however, shook my head.

"If it's ok, I would like to stay a little longer."

Footsteps scuffed the pavement, "Farlan, let her be. We have obligations to fulfill today. When she's done, she knows to return home," Levi said. His tone was unusually soft. Farlan eventually agreed. Isabel patted my shoulder before they all took their leave.

I sat in the company of my dear friend.

Time passed leisurely, and as it did I took the moments to explain everything to her. I mentioned the guilt. My tongue voiced the concerns of the dream. I discussed the fears that were dwelling deep within me. How I was scared to be alone. How I was terrified of the monstrous disease that was consuming my eye.

"How-how am I suppose to live like this, Amara?"

My friend was unresponsive.

"Tell me, what should I do? This-This hunger," I whispered. I rocked back and forth. I had already checked under the sheet and was relieved to know that I had not even taken a bite out of her. It was all in my head, or so I thought.

Amara remained quiet.

I stopped rocking, "You know you're starting to creep me out."

Again, nothing was mentioned.

"I guess I better go," I sniffled a dry sob. I scooted towards my friend. There she lay covered. Suddenly, I noticed the color of the fabric that concealed her body. My eyes widened at the sight. Why had I not noticed it before? Goosebumps traveled up my arms.

"Why-why is it blue?" I asked nervously.

 **Were my dreams becoming reality?**

* * *

After collecting myself and shaking off the horrible sensation, I made my way home. Having to leave Amara was difficult. It was hard to say my final _good-bye._ It took strength to walk away. I had kissed her on the cheek. Then told her she could spread her wings that we would indeed meet again someday.

 _"I'll be fine," I told her._

I headed down the usual path. I passed the typical vacant buildings and ignored the weary homeless. Things seemed like the usual. That was until a loud crash halted my tracks.

Fearing another confrontation, I continued on my way.

"Levi-Bro!"

My heart exploded with concern. Even my muscles twitched at the familiar voice. Isabel's yelling sent little alarms throughout my head. Everything inside me screamed to find her, to save her. Without thinking, I raced to the scene.

I zipped into the depths of the maze like city. My feet carried me around a stack of crates and boxes. I made a few left and rights before venturing upon the sight of my caretakers. I stood in the light of alleyway. My mind was scrambled like eggs and frying like them too. I couldn't comprehend what I was seeing.

"Elke! Elke it's alright-its alright-" Farlan tried to comfort me.

There was my trio of guardians all bound and forced on their knees. Levi's face was smashed into a mud puddle. I cringed, knowing his cleanliness habits. I saw Isabel's worrisome face. What was happening? A group of members dressed in moss colored capes diverted their attention towards me. A broad chested man with blue eyes and fine blonde hair zeroed in on me.

"Now, who might this be?" The stranger asked. I took a step back.

Isabel wormed under the restraints, "Don't touch her! She's not apart of this!" I couldn't take my eyes off the man before me.

"She related to any of you?" He questioned.

"No! Leave her alone! Elke-" Farlan grunted vigorously. He tried to get to his feet.

The blonde stranger ignored the threats. His hand began to reach towards me. His fingers neared dangerously close. Panic stung within me. My uncertain eyes happen to glance at our leader. Levi's stoic face burned into me.

"Run brat! Go-run!"

I couldn't believe what I heard.

"Go now!" Levi yelled. His mouth spewed the muddy water.

I stumbled back with doubts. I pleaded with Levi. I couldn't leave them. No, I wouldn't. I tried to muster up some words. Except Levi overpowered me.

"Fucking run! Don't stop, don' look back. Run, go now!"

The stranger advanced and soon others began to follow his lead. With a final look at my friends, I took off. I could hear Farlan and Isabel encouraging me to run faster. I could also overhear the sounds of chasing footsteps. Shouts and commands to stop were following too. I did as I was instructed, I didn't look back.

My stride lengthened and my lungs expanded. I allowed my arms to pump me forward. The balls of my feet kept me light and accelerated my pace. I opened my airway and fueled my body.

"Damn she's fast!"

"Engage 3DM gear!"

It didn't take long for the followers to disappear. I ducked under a broken canopy and headed straight for home. I figured I could seek shelter under the staircase. I would hide in the shadows until my guardians came back. They were fighters, thugs, and rulers of the city. No one could overpower them. They would return, they always did.

 **Everything would be fine.**

I didn't hesitate. My legs didn't stop. Even with an aching wrist and a tired chest I pushed onward. I owed it to my caretakers to follow their wishes. And I would so without a second thought. I saw our house. It was clear in view. I sped forward, the jacket squeaked the harder I ran. I dived under the concrete bridge and pushed myself as far back as I could.

 _You're safe. Just stay calm. Just keep quiet._ I told myself.

The seconds turned to minutes.

I waited.

 _Shouldn't they be back by now?_

I coughed a few rattled breaths. I let myself relax. My legs slid away from my chest. The knots in my shoulders untied. I took a second to adjust my eye patch. My ears were too late to have detected the approaching danger.

A hand latched onto my ankle.

Startled, I let out a cry as the hand gripped tighter. I struggled to free myself from the hold, yet it didn't seem to matter. Within a blink my body was being dragged out of my cover. I twisted around and dug my nails into the ground. I pulled back with all my might. My arms trembled against the pulling weight behind me. The flimsy nails were no match, I felt the skin underneath being torn back. The joints in my legs screamed as they were being separated. I clenched my teeth in order to cease the pain. The circulation was depleting.

"Come here, you," a man said roughly. His hand practically swallowed my tiny bone. Still, I heaved forward. My shoulders grinded and strained the more I fought. I even went as far as to kick out. However, it was all pointless.

My fingers lost their anchors and when they did, there was no mercy as I was yanked out of my shelter. My chin and throat erupted in a burn as the friction from the dirt rubbed against them. I yelled and thrashed as my small frame was pulled upward. Multiple hands blinded my vision.

 **The last I recalled was another patch concealing my only sight, I wished for my caretakers, and the faint thought of death lingered.**

* * *

I had been shuffled into a room, which was hours ago.

My throat was parched. My eyes stung with dried tears and my injured wrist only grew more inflamed the longer I had to wait. The same man who wrangled me out from the staircase had taken off the other blindfold. He too had blonde hair, expect it resembled more of a bowl cut. His upper lip had a fuzzy critter on it and he had this strange intimidating habit of sniffing me.

I scooted awkwardly away from him however, the chair would only move so far. I duct out of the path of his nose. My shoulders flinched at every sniff and snort.

"That's enough, Mike."

I was relieved when the commanding authority ended the interrogation. I adjusted the onset shiver that tried to crawl up my spine. I fiddled with my hands that were placed lightly in my lap. My pants were dirty and scuffed from the fight.

I heard a chair scrape the floor, "So this must be all very scary for you. I do apologize for the way you were treated earlier. Do forgive me, that is not normally how we handle things here."

I didn't meet his gaze.

I had been placed in some sort of square box. The sun's warm hues passed through elegant cut windows. The rich orange and red décor flooded the room. Papers were filed neatly across the table, while a ceiling tall stack of books consumed an entire wall. Everything smelled fresh. The area was both astonishing and threating. I hadn't been in such an exquisite atmosphere since, I was little and in the company of Dad.

"You hungry?" The blonde man asked. I peeked my eyes up, barely showing the slits of my irises.

"Wh-where are my friends?" I gulped my question. The stranger raised a brow before letting out a chuckle. I sunk in my chair, unsure of how to handle the situation. He leaned back in his seat.

"Ah, so they aren't related to you. From the way they sounded, I figured you must be at least a cousin? Sister? Perhaps even a daughter? Strange seeing criminals taking care of a child. Never would have guessed they would have any affection in their hearts. Especially that shorter guy, _Levi_."

My attention spiked, "Can-can-may I see him?"

"All in good time. First, I would like to know a little more about you. What's your name? I'm Erwin, by the way. It's a pleasure to meet you." The man leaned forward. I darted my eyes up and down.

"I-I'm Elke. Or-or Mister Levi calls me, _brat_ a lot," I shrugged, "And it's nice to meet you too." Erwin thundered an unexpected laugh that caused me to jolt in my wooden chair. I had to steady myself so I wouldn't fall.

"That he would. Not surprised," Erwin trailed off. Then his eyes snapped back to me, "tell me Elke why is it you're living with them? They didn't kidnap you did they? What's come of your parents? Do you have other siblings?"

I debated about the rambling of questions. Would my guardians want me to spout all the answers? What did Mister Levi think of this man? I picked at the splint on my arm.

"If-if I answer your questions. Can I go back to-to my friends?" I pressed hopefully. Erwin lifted a grin across his face.

"Absolutely."

It didn't take long to explain my life leading up to being rescued by my trio of caretakers since, quite honestly most of my past was fuzzy. Once I took my final breathe of words, the room was completely silent. I shifted in my seat.

"Well that explains a heap of things," Erwin said. The tall man scooted from his chair, circled the table, before making his way towards me. I grew stiff; his figure was directly in front of me. "Except, the idea behind this patch. You're not missing an eye are you, Elke?"

I shook my head, "No-no. Mister Levi won't allow anyone to see it. It causes bad things to happen. It-it got my friend killed." I lowed my gaze, "because of this- Amara's gone. Because of me." I held in the tears.

The stranger didn't push any further.

I raised my head, "Please, can I see my friends? I-I answered your questions. Please-?"

A knock came at the door, followed by the crashing of a hyper fumbling person. My eyes were huge as I watched the individual dance across the room trying to juggle a plate. I nearly jumped out of my seat.

Surprisingly, the dish of food managed to land on the table in one piece. I starred at the woman. Her matching uniform and goggle glasses had me perplexed.

"Ah, sorry 'bout that! You know how those doorknobs can be-trickily little bas- Oh-" the women with brunette hair leaned towards me. She studied me like a shinny coin. "So-so is this the girl you were talking about Erwin? My-my she's a cutie ain't she?" I blinked at her dazzling smile. No one ever got that excited over my presence.

Erwin let out a sigh, "That she is. Elke this is-" The women bounced in her own words.

"Section Commander Hanji, dear! Oh Elke, I have a feeling you and I are going to have some great times together!" She leaned her head on her palms and looked at me dreamily.

"When can I see Mister Levi?" I asked again and completely ignored the women's welcoming sentences. I was growing antsy.

"Why don't you have something to eat? Here ya go, delicious **blood sausage** _._ Freshly grounded this morning-" The women cheerfully grinned as she moved the plate towards me. My stomach went queasy. There in front of me, was the closets resemblance to intestines I had ever seen. The dark crimson and black wrinkled tube of meat starred at me. The spicy aroma filled my nose.

"Oh silly me! You probably need help cutting, here-" Hanji lifted the silverware and began slicing the thick dead tissue. I could feel the bubbling nausea in my gut. Chunks of white and pink bits were sandwiched in the middle. My tongue fizzled a goody slim at the sight.

The forked bloody meat was lifted to my lips, "Here ya go! Doesn't smell wonderful?"

I didn't bother to hold it back; I leaned over and puked every nightmarish memory.

* * *

"Farlan! Isabel!" I shouted with pure excitement. I couldn't restrain myself from rushing passed the door and embracing each one of them. My heart filled satisfaction when they wrapped me in their protective arms.

"Elke, we're so glad you're ok," Farlan ruffled my hair. Isabel kneeled to my eye level and started examining me from head to toe. She pulled my clothes and stretched my arms out.

"They didn't hurt you, did they? Because if they did-"

I shook my head, "No-they gave me a new arm though." I held up my right limb. It was braced with a new, more flexible white wrap. "The bone doesn't feel so floppy now," I said.

Isabel let out a sigh.

"And she managed to vomit her stomach raw. Poor kid. No worries though. Oh I'm Hanji Zoe. Nice to meet you all." The women waved a friendly gesture.

"Thank you for returning her to us," Farlan said as he patted my head. I let out a small grin.

Hanji leaned over, "Nothing to it. She's a cutie and has such fine manners. Guessing you guys branded that into her, huh?" The goggled lady laughed.

"Elke has always been polite since the day we found her-" Isabel complimented me. Farlan let out a cough.

"Though there has been _one_ major influence." I heard the stomping of perfectly executed steps. I didn't hesitate to run to him.

"Mister Levi-Levi!" I chanted. I halted in front of him. His cleaning mask was raised over his nose. The short man tucked a cloth into his pocket before he pulled the fabric down. His stern expression meant everything to me and I would respect anything he commanded, that included forceful hugs without permission.

"Tch, doesn't seem like you ran fast enough." Levi's words hit me. My excitement drained. I shrugged.

"I-I-"

"Look at me." Levi raised my chin. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach.

I waited for my punishment.

"I'm glad you're alright, brat." His thumb rubbed a smudge from my cheek. _I could relax, everything was going to be fine._

* * *

 **Sorry for the boring chapter.**

 **Again, introduction to characters can be tiresome.**

 **However, get ready-this point forward is going to get interesting!**

 **The gang is in the Survey Corps and going to be seeing those naked beasts soon. Oh how exciting!**

 **Wonder how Elke is going to handle her new life?**

 **Being "caretakers" on the surface might change things.**

 ***dramatic music***

 **~Ok, is this not the most adorable Fan Art? I love this! Check out** kirauki on tumblr for the pic! Sorry Fanfiction never lets you post urls.

Special thanks to **Shadlet** for being a loving contributing fan! This made my day!

(If you can't view it's on her Tumbler page. Pm her to see it! Too cute!)


	8. Notice

Hello readers,

Sorry not a chapter update but a notice to all who are enjoying Der Rupel.

By the way, thanks a million to everyone who has favorited, followed, and reviewed! Not to mention all the countless messages and support behind the scenes; everyone here is amazing!

Ok, in response to our **Guest reviewer** and others who have messaged me…Der Rupel will resume around December 10 at the earliest.

I have college finals and artwork deadlines that are eating up the clock. Sucks I know.

Aside from that, I am also carefully planning each chapter from here on out. This story is going to be very in-depth and long and I don't wish to ruin it by rushing it. With that being said, I will have an editor soon to join on board to ensure better grammar for everyone ;) Everything is still rolling and in the works.

Hang in there everyone!

Hoping to be making a custom ink cover for this story (because I love it so much) and also may do a character sheet to show readers exactly what Elke looks like. Or if anyone wants to participate in fan art like awesome reader **Shadlet** then by all means have fun! Would love to see your work! Just would appreciate any work to have a link to the story :)

Anyway, thats's all for now everyone. Sorry for the long wait, promise I won't disappoint! Chapters may end up being a bit shorter, since I am in the process of writing my own novels. Have to make time for everything.

Again thanks to everyone who has followed Elke's story. She's quite the character, huh?

She's only going to steal your heart more!

*Guest reviewers: Note that if you wish for me to response make an account! I always reply back!

 **Cheers,**

 **Enked**


	9. Kaffee

**Der Rüpel**  
Chapter VI:Schwarzwurst

* * *

Our reunion seemed short lived.

The exotic young women, Hanji Zoe eventually took her leave after countless ramblings about some unfamiliar topic about _Titans._ Farlan had been the only individual, at the time, who seemed even remotely interested. I recall him just standing there, with loosely crossed arms, and his shoulder leaning against a bunk bed's frame. He would nod occasionally or interject a question or two.

I, on the other hand, was too engrossed in Levi's cleaning inspection to bother paying attention to _such_ adult talk. Instead, I found myself stationed at Lev's side and tended to his every curse.

 _Fucking filthy this_ and _shitty disgusting brats that,_ he would say.

I trailed behind with a ready-made cloth ready to fight any left over germs that dared to invade my guardian's presence. I sort of enjoyed the work. Many of times, I pretended to be a ruthless thug, a leader among the rebels. The bacteria were my nemesis and would be crushed by the swift circular motions of my hand. I would mumble a few catch phrases.

"Any last words, filth?" I would say with squinted eyes. Then I would raise my uninjured hand to the window. Embarrassingly enough, I believe Levi was catching onto my make-believe-game.

My hand came near Isabel's. She barely noticed when I accidently brushed her skin; her eyes were intensely starring out past the glass. Her fixated body told me the gears in her mind were turning rapidly.

"That's were we will be tomorrow." The red headed girl gleamed.

I paused, "where?" I cocked my head as I looked in her direction. I couldn't see much. The sun's retreating colors were still blinding. I wasn't use to such intense hues. Isabel laughed before pointing near, what looked to be an open lot. There were strange tall fuzzy silhouettes coming from the ground.

"There ya goof. Free. We will be able to finally be free."

I made a simple wipe, unable to grasp the reality.

 _Free…_

 _Freedom…_

"We-were a-above?" I stuttered looking at Isabel. How had I not seen it before? She smiled and turned to me as well.

"That's right, Elke. We made it, we're on the surface!"

I was about to join in her excitement, when the door to the quarters was abruptly slammed opened. My shoulders jolted at the sudden noise. Isabel protectively moved in front of me. Even Farlan came to our defense, as he stood in front of the doorway. I wasn't sure if my nerves were ever going to settle. This place, the surface, was filled with more uncertainty than the underground.

Amara, it's rather scary here.

"Tsk, when someone knocks on the damn door, the least you could do is open it. Show some respect for your commanding officer." The stranger snarled his words. I cautiously peered around Isabel. The man who stood before us wasn't anyone who I would deem worthy of leadership. He was a rather average looking man. He had sandy blonde hair that was messy and parted strangely on top of his head. A thin beard was stippled around his chin and he held the most unappealing eyes I had ever seen.

"Apologies, we didn't hear you knock, Sir." Farlan replied attentively. I nearly fell over, _Sir?_

Isabel let out a snort, "He never knocked-" Farlan jerked his head around and gave her the don't-intervene- expression. I kept as quiet as possible, until the stranger's eyes fell on me. I shuffled closer to Isabel.

"What are a bunch of _girls_ doing in the men's quarters? Tsk, more specifically-" The man shoved passed Farlan. I felt Isabel tense. "What's a child doing here? This is the military not a daycare facility. She's to be removed immediately." My stomach twisted.

Isabel came to my defense, "She's with us. Elke is not going anywhere-" I heard Farlan make his way over to us. He attempted to use his calm demeanor to help sway the angered officer.

"Elke won't be any trouble. She's more mature than the rest of us. Isn't that right kiddo?" Farlan looked at me with a small smile. I swallowed some courage and slowly stepped from around Isabel. I did my best to straighten my shoulders. I put my hands behind my back and glanced up at the stranger.

 _"Remember to always look adults in the eye, Elke. Demonstrate your manners."_ Dad's words filtered through my head, " _Clear voice. Don't mumble!"_

I took a breath, "Sorry Sir, I was only cleaning. It's-It's nice to meet you though. I'm Elke." I said as politely as possible. I could feel his eyes burning into me. I gripped the rag behind my back to try and ease myself from fidgeting.

"Tsk, I will be discussing this with Erwin." The stranger growled. I gulped at his response.

As if on cue, Levi ventured into the commotion, his unstirred expression didn't settle well with the intruder. The man aggressively directed his attention to _our_ leader, who was oblivious to the situation.

"Is this how you address your commander? By delaying your presence?" The blonde man thundered. Levi halted wiping his hands.

"Eh? You've got a problem?" Levi asked rudely. The stranger let out an unpleasant grumble.

"You underground rats are _detestable_. The next time you runts don't acknowledge my company, punishment will be in forced. Am I clear?" Unknowingly, I immediately nodded vigorously. I didn't want to be disciplined. However, Levi didn't hesitate to express his attitude towards the situation. Being bold, uncaring of the size difference, he marched up to the officer and glared him down…or rather up.

All three of us cringed.

The blonde wasn't sure how to react, "What-what's with that look? How dare you-" I could feel the tension about to boil. I fumbled with the cloth in my fingers before I made my way over to Levi. Maybe I could cool the rivalry between the two. I knew how to derail his fixation.

I stood next to my dark headed guardian, "Mister Levi-?" I asked as I gently tugged on his sleeve. He seemed reluctantly to acknowledge my question. I pressed further, "Levi Sir, there's a stain that won't come off the window." I then heard Levi sigh, however his gaze didn't waver from the man before us.

The solider narrowed his eyes, "Tsk, I'm through wasting my time with you low lives. I came to inform you that food is available in the commands. Do your best not to make a scene and shall you steal, I'll have your asses escorted off this premises so fast that your head will spin. "

I looked at the man as he starred down at me, "got it?" the officer asked. I didn't blink as I again, nodded with understanding. Levi stepped around me.

"Shall _you_ have a problem, you confront it with me. Not her." Levi's said coldly. The leading solider clenched his teeth before muttering vile complaints as he left the room. I let my shoulders drop.

"Clearly that could have gone better." Farlan groaned as he rubbed his head. Isabel rolled her eyes at his remark.

"The dude should have knocked."

Farlan ignored her, "Levi, enough with the attitude. We don't need any more suspicious eyes on us. Remember this entire situation didn't happen accidently. We're under orders." I could barely here my guardian's words as he whispered them so quietly. Levi continued to wipe his hands.

"Did you not hear that shithead rambling on about us being low lives and threating us like we are some obnoxious children?" I rocked on my heels awkwardly as I listened. I felt lost in the conversation.

"We're doing it for the job." Farlan urged. And for once, I noticed a slight nod from Levi.

"I know-" He then slowly allowed his gaze to mine, "-just something's weren't meant to happen." His brows looked almost worrisome. I played with my lips.

"I lied Mister Levi-" I began, "there was no stain."

All at once, I received a round of laughs.

Then my stomach decided to chime in as well.

"Alright, let's go get some chow!" Isabel shouted happily.

* * *

The smells were additive; the tastes were unimaginable. My tongue swirled around my watering mouth as each spoonful of delicious grub was shoveled in. I hardly chewed. My jaw acted more like a portal to my stomach. There was no time to waste breaking down the meal.

"Take it easy kiddo," Farlan lightly chuckled as he tried to steer my silverware away from my teeth. "You're going to have a belly ache if you over stuff yourself. I know its good but slow down." I inhaled the next bloated amount of food. Truthfully, I was afraid I would never have another heavenly dinner like this one, again. Even the bread, had a more appetizing quality. Its warm crusted top sent my stomach viciously demanding for more.

The two soups, cooked vegetables, and several small loafs were already devoured. Still I hungered for more. I must have looked like a ravenous animal, since I was receiving multiple stares from other soldiers in the room. I tore the flesh off the breed and continued to chomp down.

Levi, who sat across the table, only managed to shake his head. Another sip of his drink was brought to his lips. I swallowed the lump of mushy dough. I noticed that Levi had hardly touched his plate.

"You want to try it?" Farlan broke my train of thought. I starred at him as I sat on his lap, "Levi, let her have some." With a _'tch'_ Levi reluctantly let his cup be handed over.

"She's not going to like it. Hell I don't even like that shit."

Farlan handed me the glass cup. The smell was powerful and reminded me of a burnt substance. The dark, almost black, liquid sat near the rim. I raised my visible brow. Farlan instructed me to blow on it first. I watched the steam wave away from my cool breath. I sniffed one last time. It seemed all right I thought, as I brought the cup to my lips.

Instantly, my face scrunched up at the bitter almost rancid tasting juice. Its thick creamy texture and unsatisfying flavor made my tongue swell. Reacting more than thinking I spat the stuff back where it rightfully belonged…in the cup.

I heard the rounds of snorting howls from Isabel and Farlan. Levi was the only one distressed as he was handed back the contaminated remains. He let out a groan as I continued to whine about my soured tongue. In between snickers Farlan retrieved another glass for me and I gulped the clear refreshing water.

"What was that nasty stuff?" I asked, as my tongue lay limp over my lip. Now everything was going to taste burnt. Levi leaned back from the table.

"It _was_ my **coffee** ," he sighed.

I felt Farlan ruffle my hair, "It's suppose to make short people taller, Elke."

"And less grumpy." Isabel interjected over stuffed cheeks. I looked at Levi in astonishment.

"You better finish that Mister Levi," I said seriously. Only the others found humor in this enlightening information. The guardian across the table kept a stone face.

"Is it not your bed time yet, brat?" Levi asked with almost exhaustion hinted in his voice. I only managed a shrug when a familiar figure approached the table. Without hesitation the broad chested man took a seat next to Levi.

"Yes, I would assume all growing children need their sleep," Erwin said. I could sense the drastic mood change. I wasn't entirely sure why. This man didn't portray himself other than having kind intensions. I felt obligated to speak first.

"Thank you for the fixing my arm, Commander-Erwin-Sir. Feels a lot better." I raised the wrapped wrist that was positioned in the sling around my neck. Erwin gave me a surprisingly heart-felt grin.

"You're quite welcome Miss Elke. Though Hange was more of the creative inventor for your cast. I simply lead you to her. Send your thanks to her as well." I agreed with his remark as I looked at the interesting buckles that were strung around the boards. It was an odd design.

"I know you didn't just come to make a check up round. What do you want?" Levi pressed. His body language was unusually ridged. Even Farlan held me slightly tighter. Isabel rested her spoon on her plate.

"Ah yes, well better to address business than beat around the bush, huh?" Erwin said. Everyone remained silent, expect for my tiny nibbles at a new piece of bread that I snatched from another plate. "Flagon, your squad leader, just informed me of your little traveler." I hadn't realized the blue eyes that settled on me.

"She won't be a bother I can assure you." Farlan replied quickly. His arm wrapped around my stomach snuggly. The security and a full belly were making me drift off into a relaxed slumber. It had been a long over-stimulating-day. I nestled my tired head against my guardian's chest. Bits of the conversation still rang through my ears.

"I can not allow a mere child to be running aimlessly around our quarters and training facility. She doesn't belong in such an environment. There are plenty solutions for this small problem. We have a fine orphanage in our town. She's a decent kid, I'm sure some single women will take a liking to her. A work house would be more than willing to have an extra hand-"

"We won't allow you to separate us. She wouldn't understand. Life has been cruel enough for her, taking her away will only be more harmful than good. She relies on us too much. " Farlan said. I fluttered my eyes, as he grew more intense with his tone.

"Where ever she goes we go as well. And that's that." Isabel let out a huff. I slightly raised myself from Farlan's chest. My free hand rubbed my tired lids.

"What's wrong?" I questioned barely awake. My caretaker hushed me and pushed my head back to his body. His fingers gently messaged my hair.

"You'll have to excuse me _Commander,_ but it's past her bed time. Have a good evening." I heard Farlan dismiss himself as I felt him carry me off. Normally, I would have offered to walk back to the room. Except, I was too tired to even muster any words. I looked over his shoulder to see Isabel following our lead.

I watched as Levi listened to another round of Erwin's words before finally taking his leave.

I wondered what tonight's chapter was going to bring?

* * *

Morning came before I was even aware I had completely dozed off.

Not much was mentioned after dinner. I cooperated appropriately when I was instructed to stay with Isabel. Farlan had kissed me goodnight as he laid me next to my hyper caretaker. It was the first late hours that I didn't have Levi's security. Strangely, I wasn't consumed by any horrible dreams. I slept as if I were dead. Isabel's heavy snores must have been the magic trick.

"Elke-Elke," My body felt limp as it was shaken awake. My crusted eyes adjusted to the bright lights and a smiling Isabel. She was dressed in an unfamiliar outfit. She had on a tan leader jacket, with short pants, and tall dirt brown boots. I sat up stiffly and wiped the drool from my lip.

"What's going on? Where'd you get those clothes?" I asked in a daze. Isabel stopped rocking my shoulder and stood up straight. Her pride in her new attire sparkled off of her like fairy dust. She pointed her thumb at herself.

"I'm heading off to training with the others. Today's the day we get to show off our skills with the 3DM Gear and use our strengths to slay those Titans. Neat, huh?" Isabel glowed as she headed to the door. I blinked several times before realizing her words.

"Your-Your leaving?" I staggered out of bed to follow her. I looked up at her with uncertainty in both eyes. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "Can't I come?" I pleaded. Isabel bit her lip.

"I don't know Elke, the others said you need to stay here. It's like back home, ok? Remember? Just wait till we come back-"

I interrupted, "when are we going home?" Isabel's eyes fell then shrugged her shoulders as she gestured around the room.

"This is home Elke," she said. I peered around the bare quarters. Nothing but wooden walls and beds confined us. Everything seemed dreary even though we weren't underground. I looked out the window, at the sun, at the possibilities.

However, I felt hollow.

I held back the miserable tears that wanted to flood my face. What more was I too say?

I heard a nervous sigh, "Alright you can come. Just make sure you wear that eye patch ok? Hurry up, I can't be late on the first day!" I perked up with a lite up smile before I bounced off to get dressed. I couldn't wait for the endless adventures that awaited us.

* * *

 _Some adventure,_ I thought to myself as I sat hidden under a so-called _bush_.

The itchy leaves and jagged twigs scraped my skin. The multiple hours had finally taken its toll on my sanity. All right, I had to admit seeing my caretakers introduce themselves to the group was thrilling and watching them practice basic maneuvers was captivating, however it gets old for anyone. Besides, Levi flatted out any training partner that crossed his path. It was outdated news to me.

The blazing sun was high in the sky. The mellow breeze rustled the terrain's vegetation and my parched throat only grew worse. I wasn't use to such sweltering heat. I peeked through the gaps in the leaves. Isabel was the only individual who knew I was here. Relaying on water from her was like waiting for this arm to heal. It was pointless. I sat with a raw bum as the moments passed.

Levi was saddled with the 3DM gear and taking off the path. I figured he was going to shine with his abilities. I felt rather honored to be under such a gifted flyer. However, part of me felt ashamed that I didn't have anything to offer. I didn't have a talent to boast about or for my guardians to spout off to others.

"I'm just-" I paused, "I'm just me." It was like a stab to the chest. I fiddled with my wrist when the sound of pounding footsteps caught my attention. I veered my eyes to the right and noticed an exhausted man staggering to an observing officer. He weakling saluted before rummaging through a worn bag. He became rather frantic when his search came up empty handed.

"Wonder what he's looking for?" I whispered to myself. That's when a sealed beige envelope danced in front of me. Its smooth papery surface just sat there, out in the open, unaware by its handler that it was near by. I darted my eyes back to the tired man who was being scowled by the other.

I felt terrible.

He just needed the paper.

Mentally, I convinced myself I could just drop off the item and scurry back before being noticed. I glanced around. What were the possibilities of my guardians noticing me? I shrugged off the gut warning. I reached through the pokey sticks and retrieved the object. With swollen joints I got to my knees and trotted quickly to the two men.

"I-I'm sorry Sir. I-I must have left it at headquarters. I'm sorry-it's been a busy day with letters and deliveries-" I heard the young man try to justify. The officer ignored the other and continued to shout over him.

"I don't give a damn about your excuses! That's an important document you just lost! I'll have your head for this-"

I shyly stepped forward, "Um excuse me." Instantly the man's rants were switched off and their heads dropped towards me. I sucked in a mouth full of air. "You-you dropped this." I slowly held out the envelope. I watched as the messenger boy nearly fainted with relief. The officer snatched the paper and let out a gruff.

"Whom do you belong to?" He asked sternly. I chewed my lip and did a small dance. What was I to say? I wasn't even supposed to be seen. Now he's asking questions. What do I do? The thoughts circled my head.

"I asked you a question." The man repeated. His wrinkled eyes and scruffy short brunette hair weren't friendly for an older man. I moistened my tongue in order to speak.

"Sorry Sir, I-I have friends in the military." I said as causally as possible. I hoped not to draw attention to my caretakers. I swung my arm around in my sling.

The man narrowed his eyes, "You're not by chance related to that screwball Hanji are you?" I scratched my nose.

"Uh-no-no Sir." I said truthfully. He let out of grunt then returned to opening the important document. His eyes scanned the sheet. The young man next to me leaned down towards my level.

"Thanks for your help. You really saved my neck there." He held out his hand with a worn grin. I remembered my manors and shook his with a proper grip.

"No problem, Mister," I replied. As he straightened his posture he returned his attention back to the man of authority. Again, that strange sign was crossed over his chest. I wondered what that was about?

"Sir, permission to carry on? The young man yelled. The officer waved him off.

"Granted." He said as he turned and headed towards the filled courtyard. I too was about to leave when the messenger boy beckoned me back.

"Where ya going kiddo?" He asked.

I hesitated, "To sit down? Uh-over there-" I pointed in the direction of my hideout. The man shielded his vision to see against the sun. He stepped towards me.

"That's an awful place for you. Have you been there all day?" He asked me, to which I simply nodded.

"Yes, Sir." I heard him rummage through his bag once more. His hands surprised me when they pulled out a wrapped sandwich and a bagged water bottle.

"Would you like to share some lunch?"

* * *

I learned quite a bit about him and this fun deprived place.

Moblit Berner was his name. He was another decent individual who made really delicious sandwiches. He informed me about general things. How the military worked, the different branches, why we fought Titans, who was in command, and why he was the fill-in messenger. Most of the conversation was well over my head. I simply pretended I comprehended his words.

"It's really a hassle. I'm sure Hanji is not pleased with me having to skip on training. If only that other cadet hadn't injured his leg. Now, I'm stuck running these letters like the pony express until it heals." Moblit sighed as he bit into his food. The crumbs fell from his chin.

I swallowed, "So you just _run_ all over the place and hand out those packages?"

"Yeah, that's basically it. The _running_ is the challenging part. I have no stamina to keep up the pace. I'm always getting reprimanded for being late. It's definitely not the job for me." He lightly chuckled. We sat on a bench behind a brick building. The shade cooled my once over heated body. The water had helped tremendously as well. A group of new soldiers were shuffled around a dusty track. Their feet pounded the ground so heavily it looked as though they had iron shoes.

"I could do it," I said. The man looked at me with doubt.

"You wouldn't want to Elke. It's not at all enjoyable. Besides, you seem like your recovering yourself." He gestured from my head to my arm, "wouldn't want you to get more injured. I'm sure your parent's wouldn't appreciate that." Without hesitating I placed the half eaten food next to me, removed Levi's old jacket, slide my arm from he sling, and rested next to the other items.

I faced him directly, "If I can keep up with them. Will that prove that I can do it?" Moblit blinked in disbelief.

"Uh well, sure I-I guess. But Elke-" I didn't give him a second to change his mind. I untied my eye patch and darted toward the group.

My legs pulsed with adrenaline as I raced forward. I used my arms to increase my speed as I advanced upon the collection of soldiers. I heard many baffled remarks as I zoomed near the front of the pack. My one foot barely scraped the surface as I was already plowing onto the next leg. I had learned how effectively sprint with one eye. I counted my breaths, listened to the rhythm of my shoes, or focused on distant things. If I narrowed my mind to the present, the notion of running, I would stumble.

Basically I ran blind.

My shoulders pumped me onward as I rounded the second then third turn. I hadn't noticed how far back all the others were. It hadn't dawned on me that I stood alone. It was solely I, flying lap after lap. I had never felt so revived. The beats from my chest, the sweat from my skin, the deep heaves from my lungs, all excited my senses more. Even the aches in my legs were a comforting reminder of my past.

 _Amara, don't you remember our days together?_

 _Amara don't you recall the times we got away?_

 _It was our legs, our hearts, which allowed us victory._

Amara. I looked to my side as the wind stirred a dusty cloud. There she was, racing with me as if she never had left. In my mind, I challenged her a final time. I wasn't done. I wasn't tired. Another corner was pasted as I accelerated further. She wouldn't beat me.

Just as it begun, it ended. My feet were swept out from underneath me as I was yanked off the track. My ankles twisted over themselves as I fumbled with my footing. A rough hand had me by the collar of my shirt and I had no choice except to follow its direction.

I struggled against the hold until I saw who was starring me down with an enraged face. My heart pounded and hammered against my chest. The words spilled out of my mouth like a hot liquid.

"M-Mister-Mister Levi!" I exclaimed as I was pulled around to face him. His grey eyes shot through me as his hardened fingers gripped my shoulders.

"What the hell are you doing out of the room?" He gritted his teeth as he asked me. I whimpered as I tried to justify my actions.

"I-I-I was just-"

His hands tightened, "Did I not just tell you last night that you were to wait there until we returned? Do you not know how import this training is, brat? Do you realize what's at stake here?" His anger only caused me to tremble.

"No-no I'm-I'm sorry Mister Levi-I didn't-" I shook my head rapidly. A crowd of other cadets and officers started to gather around. They were witnessing first hand how intimidating Levi truly could be.

The fabric on my shirt was pulled tighter, "And when the hell have you ever been allowed to be seen with out covering that eye? God damnit brat, do you ever follow directions?"

The tears rolled down my heated cheeks.

"Don't give me that cry baby shit. You know what've done. Ignoring orders and then to walk off with a fucking stranger. Tch, you've really put the icing on the cake today. You're lucking I don't pass out the adoption forms right now." I shook in his hold as I realized just how far I pushed the boundaries.

There were no words.

"And you-" Levi spun around towards Moblit who nearly melted at Levi's glare. "What kind of creep are you to force an nine year old into running laps?" The young man stuttered before his Commander came to his aid.

"Ah shorty don't go killin' my assistant here. No harm was done. From the sounds of it, Elke wanted to run the letters. She was showing off how fast she was, which was very-"

"Look shitty glasses, I don't need your two cent piece of shit input. The brat is not under your guidance; she's under mine. Dumbass," Levi returned his gaze at stiff solider. "Talk to her again and I'll slice your nape like that training dummy. Understood?"

"M-Mister Levi please-please don't be mad at him. It wasn't his fault. It was mine." I sniffed as the snot plugged my nose. My rattling chest was noticeable as I tried to talk over breaths. I coughed the more I struggled.

"I'm well aware it was your fault. Doesn't take much evidence to know which brat disobeyed me. " Levi retorted hatefully as he then dragged me back on the track. Unexpectedly, he shoved me forward which caused me to trip onto the rocky surface. My knees collided with the ground; I hadn't realized the massive bloody wounds until I tried to stand. The stinging pain was unbearable.

With crossed arms and a stern face Levi starred down at me, "You want to fucking run so badly, fine. Here's a test for you, run until the sunsets. If you so much as ease to a jog, I'll tie your ass to the bed frame for the remaindered of the week."

I trembled, as I stood humiliated in front of everyone. My knees cried bloody tears at every slight movement. What had I done? I looked to the crowd to see Farlan and Isabel both distant as if this weren't happening. I wanted to scamper to them. I wanted to crawl into their arms and beg for comfort. However, I knew they were just as powerless as I. If Levi meant business, there was no other way around it.

"S-Shorty that's a little harsh, don't you think?" Hanji intervened. Our leader refused to take his eyes off of me.

"Why? The brat claims she wants to be a runner. And to be a messenger one has to be independent, one has to be an adult. If she wishes to be an adult then she must take punishment like one. It's that fucking simple," Levi raised a brow at me. "Well?"

I looked down the track with blurry eyes. My throat again felt dry and my legs instantly turned to led. Amara had long since disappeared and I knew I was alone. I rubbed my swollen lumpy right eye and did my best to cover the noticeable feature. I was embarrassed beyond words.

I didn't want to humiliate myself any further. My knees throbbed too much and my head hurt from all the tears. Levi was aware and I was too that he had asked for the impossible. However, what if I could do it?

I looked deeper down the track and saw Amara was waving to me.

 _What if I could?_

 _What if I could prove myself?_

I wiped the tears with a clammy palm and gave a quick nod to Levi, "Y-Yes Sir."

 _We_ accepted his challenge.

Amara and I would run until the sunset. You'll see Levi, we're strong; we can go the distance.

* * *

 **All right, so as you can see…I survived finals! Horray!**

 **As for this chapter, I decided to add some different interactions to this piece. I literally re-wrote this several times. And I figured, what the heck it's a long story anyway might as well give all the insights, preps, and details.**

 **Moblit is not really a messenger. In fact, the messenger thing doesn't really happen in Attack on Titan. I put this snip bit in there for later chapters. Remember everything you read has a reason behind it.**

 **It's not random info I can assure you.**

 **Wonder if Elke is going to prove herself?**

 **And I wonder what's with Levi? His attitude's been a little different since they've been enlisted in the military. Strange, huh?**

 **More to come!**

 **Thanks!**


	10. Der Eintopf

**Der Rüpel**  
Chapter VIII:Der Eintopf

* * *

I was on the verge of suffocation.

My lungs acted like shriveled raisins inside of my chest. No amount of air seemed to satisfy the dying desire my body craved. I could feel every muscle in my limbs pleading for relief. The strain they had to endure bordered on insanity. Maybe that was a plus, come to think of it, I had been able to loose the track of time.

The pain had become my personal distractor.

"I'm-I'm not-not done. One more-one more st-step-" I coughed to myself. Encouragement seemed pointless, just like accepting _his_ challenge was. My weak knees screamed as I continued. The tears on my cheeks had long since dried, however the red liquid continued to drain from my legs. I could feel the swelling from my socks as they mimicked a sponge, which collected the pooling trickles.

My airway wheezed heavily. My vision blurred then faded with darkish spots or was that the sky? I wasn't sure. All that I knew was my stomach was being wrung like a rag from exhaustion. My one foot stumbled. I didn't feel it, until I smacked the ground. My palms barely caught me, as my feeble arms weren't stable. The small pebbles pieced my sweaty hands as I held myself above the ground.

I hacked my lungs clear of their stressed muscles. My spine exploded with mini rounds of bullet biting agony. I wasn't sure if I was ever going to recover. The damp sides of my hair stuck to my flushed face. Nausea brewed as I shook.

Eventually, my injured wrist gave way first, followed by the other. I allowed my immature body to finally rest. I surrendered to the punishment that Levi had so desperately wished to condemn me with. I would apologize later. Not here, not with this remaining crowd of people. My dry eyes trailed to the man who was coming forward. His cold orbs showed no mercy.

 _I tried, didn't I?_

 _We ran hard, right Amara?_

I rolled my head towards _my_ superior. His features, for some strange reason, were barely noticeable. Was I going blind? My lips twitched for words, expect my throat was too broken like the rest of me. All that spilled was the panicked breathes and small dribbles of saliva.

Levi towered over me. It seemed like an eternity as we locked eyes. He wouldn't reprehend me any more here; would he? He knew he had won. What more was there to prove?

I braced myself as he uncrossed his arms and kneeled to my level. The tension rose, my heart nearly shattered. I watched as his hand extended towards me. I choked, as I feared the worst. Instantly, I glued my eyes closed.

Then I was coated with those unexpected velvety words, "You've done alright, brat." I shot my eyes open. A calm hand rested on my head. With barely enough strength, I managed to lift my chin towards him. I looked at the half shadowed Levi with uncertainty.

"S-sir?" I mumbled. His fingers tapped my scalp lightly.

"Stand up," he said. I gave him a weary expression, facially pleaded to anything against that command. Levi shook my head, "get up, now." I wasn't entirely sure how I managed to follow him. Yet, I did. The blood began to pool around me as I stood by his side.

Dizzy spells danced around my skull. I hopped on my aching feet. Levi cleared his throat, which gave me an indirect correction.

"Straighten up," he said. I pulled my arms behind my back and stood as square as possible. Exactly the way Levi had taught me. Against, everything he had done, he was still my leader, my guardian, and I would act accordingly. I felt faint.

"Listen up you spineless military rodents," He began. I wasn't sure whom he was addressing until a member of the crowd spoke up. With heavy lids I peered into the endless bodies. I couldn't distinguish anyone.

"Levi," someone chirped.

"You see this brat standing before you?" I heard hushed whispers from the crowd. Levi continued, "She did as she was instructed; she ran until the sun set. You all witness this. She took her punishment like an adult, like a solider, like one of us. The least she deserves is your _fucking_ respect." I heard the low growl from his throat. It was difficult, but I managed a glance at him.

A deep powerful voice penetrated the silence, "I see your determination Cadet. It's rather remarkable watching you go to such lengths to ensure Miss Elke's residence here. However, swift legs aren't going to solidify a Scout's position."

"What more does she have to prove? What? You want her to leap off a damn building? We could have her be hogged tied for Titan bait if that satisfies you-" Levi attack back. My head felt as heavy as rock. My right eye, fevered with pain.

My chest still rattled, "Mis-mister Levi-" I whimpered. I didn't feel right. Each nerve pinched and released at cannon rate. The burning in my chest was the equivalent of a scorching furnace. The blood still dripped. Would it ever end?

"A child is not suited for war-"

"She's earned her place-"

I gingerly reached for Levi's sleeve, "L-Levi." I asked again.

"What is it-?" Levi snapped. My small frame had endured enough, there was no more strength to stand, and gradually I fell into his side. My head laid limp into his body.

I lifted my arms as if I had weights attached to them, "Mister Levi can-can you hold me?" I expected some resistance from him. I didn't even have to wait; I was scooped into his embrace and fell to his cradling arms. Finally, it was over.

I coughed several times. "I-I'm sorry," I said. My guardian held me securely.

"You've done alright Elke," He whispered as he carried me off.

No one could describe exactly the moments that led up to where we were.

Though, I wouldn't have had it any other way.

* * *

"Drat, can't seem to get the bleeding to stop. Gotta say, you fell pretty hard." Hanji sighed as she kept pressing more cotton to my fresh cut knees.

I had been sitting on a white-sheeted bed for what seemed like _forever._ After Levi made his awe-inspiring speech, Hanji had decided she would pester Levi until she was granted permission to _fix me up._

So, that's eventually what happened.

Levi and the others left me in the care of the kooky Squad Commander while they claimed they had to attend to other matters. I was convinced they were unaware of the possible hazards that could be forced upon me. For all I knew, I could grow an extra limb by the time she finished. Her babbling about experiments would make anyone uneasy.

The women pulled the soaked pad back. "Looks like you still have some rocks in there. Don't worry I'll get them!" She said enthusiastically as she grabbed the small thin knife once more. I let out a tired groan. That was all I could manage now. Earlier, is when my ballistic meltdown had taken place. The pain had been excruciating, I had never squealed so much in my life. Now, everything was bordering on being numb. Hanji leaned me back down onto the bed; a plush soft pillow supported my head. If she would stop talking, I could have fallen asleep.

My eyes shot open as the knife dug into the exposed flesh. I let out a hiss of discomfort and slightly bent my legs to avoid the pain. Hanji held my left knee back down and proceeded with cutting out the remaining pebbles.

"-And so you see Elke dear, that's our hypothesis, as to why the Titans don't have digestive systems, proves to be accurate. I mean that wad of left over remains didn't just sprout from the ground, am I right?" Hanji found humor in her words. I found myself queasy from the thought.

Another scrape invaded my wound.

"Ow, ow-" I simply winced and did my best not to make any more commotion. I pinched my brows together before throwing an arm over my eyes. Maybe I could block out the pain? I heard another rock bounce to the floor.

Then I felt a few more dabs from the cloth. "Well kid, looks like your going to need stitches. You ran so darn long you just kept splitting the skin. No worries dear, I'll go grab my kit. I'm a master in this after all, I've practiced on hundreds of specimens." The goggle lady practically danced out of the room, "just keep applying that pressure. I'll be right back."

I leaned forward on my stiff joints and did as I was told. Lightly, I pushed my hands down on my knees. The stings and the throbs erupted in my kneecaps. Though that wasn't the only thing that was irritating me. Aside from the soreness and aches from my muscles, and a winded chest, my right eye was unusually tender. It felt as though a several sharp pins were being stabbed through it.

The miserable part was having had endured it since I decided to accept Levi's form of punishment. Why running would make my eye sore wasn't comprehendible to me. The discomfort soared the more I messed with the two wounds. My eye had actually started to bother me more, as though it wanted the glory of being the biggest pain in the butt. I slammed my hand over it. I wanted to claw it out so badly.

Suddenly, an enticing aroma filled my nostrils. I sniffed the air like a dog. It was incredibly powerful, whatever that smell was. It was also very scrumptious. My mouth began to salivate at the idea of being able to taste it. It sort of reminded me of some tangy zest or a sweet treat. In fact, it had a range of possible flavors the more I thought about it.

My nostrils flared as the scent kept coming.

Who was cooking?

I let my eyes scan the vacant room. The walls were a bare off white and matched the flooring and shelves. It had less enthusiasm than the quarters where we slept. However, that's not what I was after.

That's when my attention was brought to the metal tin that was stashed in the corner of the room. I couldn't believe what I was starring at. There, positioned over the rim was a torn _blue_ cloth. It looked exactly like…

"Amara?" I questioned myself. Like a ghostly spirit, an invisible force beckoned me towards the trash. I slid my butt off the sheets and quietly tip toed over. The smell overpowered my senses. I stood, horrified, as I realized exactly what I had been drooling over.

I shook my head, "no-no. Oh no please." I nearly pleaded with myself, as I couldn't fathom why I was drawn to this. Why this? I peered past the torn fabric and dared to glance further downward, deeper, into the mysterious trash.

I was mortified when my stomach actually growled when I stared at it.

No one would believe that I actually pulled out that disposed of _garbage._ Except, it wasn't _waste_ to me, it was an unearthly generous gift from above. Why was I thinking this way? I was confused.

 _Yes, I had to be disoriented from running?_

 _Perhaps the meds they gave me?_

 _Surely, this was just a dream?_

Regardless, I held that mucus green and chard colored black piece of meat in my hands. It felt rubbery and slightly stiff. Again, my nose flared in excitement, my tongue danced, and even my eye seemed to radiate its own happiness. What was this strange feeling? This unusual craving that has kept invading me?

My guts slithered like hungry snakes. They were actually demanding this? I opened my mouth. I couldn't be doing this. Why, why was I doing this?

I drew the raw skin closer to my mouth. I was so desperate, so starved. I began to tremble as my tongue traced the bare outside of the skin. That's what solidified my decision, the taste was beyond divine. With eager taste buds I took no spare time and shoved that rotten looking jerky in my cheeks.

Tears dripped from my eyes as I chewed on the disposed piece of trash. I knew what I was doing was wrong, it was bordering on a sin. But I couldn't stop. The savoring flavor, the smoke spice it gave off, the exotic texture was taming this unfathomable greed. A strange sensation of wiggling worms moved around that right socket, it pulsed, swelled, and then it all died. The crunches from my mouth filled the room as I continued to devour the remains from the trash. I cried from wanting to eat this, yet I also sob when I took the final swallow.

It was over.

I sat there, as I remained kneeled in front of the metal bin. Some particles had fallen to the floor and all I could do was stare at the emptiness that surrounded me. What had I just done? I wanted to curl into a ball. There was no denying the actions I had committed to.

I would like to say I felt nauseous or deathly ill for chowing down on such a _disgusting_ substance. Sadly, no…I felt…

 _"Feel better?"_ Amara said slyly. I whipped my head around to see nothing. It's all in my head. _She's all in my head._ I was about to ask a question when my thoughts were cut short by approaching footsteps.

Quickly, I made my way back towards my seat and positioned myself as I was left. My head covered the pillow and my hands collected the cloth and placed them over my knees. I waited as still as death even as my heart pounded vigorously.

"Ah sorry it took so long, some poor other cadet was in need of some serious patch work. Managed to poke his eye out clean from training practice," Hanji laughed as she strolled in. "Everyone had to scramble to find it! No matter got the kit back." She headed towards the bed with her large black bag. I stayed like stone as pulled out her equipment. She fiddled with a needle and some thin wire like string.

"At least this will be simple stitch up. The last solider here had that _Gang Green disease._ Had to remove chunks of his arms. That infection can be quite the nuisances but it has such a lovely coloring about it. " The women thought, "Shame we had to dispose of it. I would have liked to put it under the slides."

I slightly looked at the bin.

Hanji adjusted her glasses, "Now, let's see those knees shall we?" I looked at her nervously as she reached for the bloody fabric. She wouldn't notice the empty bin would she? Her hand lifted the first one.

She hesitated, "Huh?" Her other hand swiftly peeled off the next rag. She starred for a long time before she looked at me with bewilderment.

"Your knees," She paused. "They-they're completely healed."

 _"What it not wonderful?"_ Amara asked happily.

Like having **stew** for dinner, I replied.

* * *

The rest of the evening was rather awkward.

I decided to act oblivious to the rapid healing abilities that Hanji so desperately tried to fish out of me. She even tried to remove my eye patch, as she was sure there was some hidden meaning under there. The only saving grace was when my trio of caretakers came back. I didn't resist sprinting away from the kooky Commander and into their arms.

Thankfully, no one else believed her either.

I was settled with Farlan. He had placed me on his lap while he cleaned the smudges of grim from my face and began pressing a cold rag to the bruises. Isabel was busy rambling on about her horse experiences and I listened with heavy eyes.

For once, I begged for bedtime.

A light knock came at the door. Levi who was already up, made his way to the entry.

"What do you want?" He asked coldly. Farlan let out a frustrated groan at his partner's attitude. The man on the other side replied just as sternly.

"Commander Erwin, I have authority to speak to you at this hour. Open up," he said. Levi let out his annoyed, 'tch' and surprising did as told. The thick brow man wasted no time to stroll past Levi. He glanced around the area, raised a brow at Isabel, then made his way toward where I sat.

He held a bundle of items at his side, "I would like to speak to you Miss Elke." I tilted my head.

"M-Me Sir?"

He nodded, "Yes, you. You are still Elke, correct?" I gave him a puzzled expression.

"I think so, Sir? What do you want to talk about?" I asked slightly uneasy. Farlan held me and took to speaking for me.

"I told you before, you are not separating us. She's been through enough. Especially after today's incident."

Isabel stood up as well, "Yeah so mind your own business." Erwin remained fixated on me. He took another step closer.

"Sorry, but this is between me and Elke-"

"It's alright everyone." Levi calmly said. Erwin nodded before lowering himself to my level. He held the object behind his back.

"I would like to send my dearest apologies to you, Miss Elke. I was out of line to have been discussing such traumatic things in front of you the other day."

I was completely lost. "Um It's-it's alright Sir." I replied with a shrug. Erwin let out a sigh as he continued.

"It seems I had over looked such potential, even though it stood right in front of me. I guess I had forgotten what it truly means to be a solider of the Scout Regiment. Size and maybe even age shouldn't be factors in determining one's possible aid in this section of the military. However," he paused and retrieved a paper from behind his back. "After viewing your times against other cadets its clear as any that you have a valuable place here."

I looked at Farlan who seemed just as stunned as I. Isabel even didn't have a comeback for that lengthy compliment. Levi kept his usual composure. I starred back at the blonde officer.

"Th-thank you so much Sir," I said with fluttering butterflies in my stomach.

Erwin cleared his throat, "Then Miss Elke, as Commander of the Scouts, would you do me the honor of being our permeate messenger for our branch? I would greatly appreciate it." I couldn't hold back a broad smile. I looked at each member of my group; they gave a cheerful nod of agreement. Even Levi, with crossed arms, sent me approval as well.

A blush covered my cheeks, "I-I would love to Sir." Erwin shot me a grin as he pulled from behind his back a pair of folded clothes with a tied string bow holding them together.

"Then it's official, Miss Elke you are the new messenger for the Scout Regiment. Here is your uniform." I nearly fell off Farlan's lap as I was handed the clothes. Everything was there, just like everyone else. I was recognized just like them. I jumped off Farlan's lap and wrapped my arms around Erwin's neck.

"Thank you so much! Thank you!" I practically yelled with excitement. I could hear the whispering words of relief. Erwin unraveled his hug.

"Do us proud, solider," he said. Then he saluted me with that strange hand sign. I wasn't sure how exactly it was done. I glanced at Levi, who stood behind the Commander; he quickly demonstrated the action once more.

With a smile of confidence I repeated the proper salute. "With all my strength Sir."

"Very well solider." He said as he made his way to the door. I trotted up behind him.

"Wait."

Erwin turned around, "Hm?" I licked my lips before pulling the leather jacket from the pile. I held the press clean fabric towards him.

"This is the only item I don't need," I said. Erwin have me a perplexed look before grabbing the jacket.

"It's part of the uniform."

I nodded. "I know, I just like the one Levi gave me. It's my protector. It's a magic shield when I name impossible things. It's always with me." I looked up at the tall man. He raised a brow towards Levi.

"Seems to do the trick." Levi shrugged emotionlessly. I could have sworn I saw Eriwn hold back a chuckle.

"Very well, I wouldn't want any solider feeling vulnerable to danger. Do keep it close, Miss Elke. Might come in handy sooner than you think." Erwin replied a last time before dismissing himself. Levi shut the door behind him.

"Well that was a unexpected surprise, huh?" Isabel said as she put her hands on her lips. Fralan got up from his chair.

"Talk about a change in fate. What do you think about that Levi?" Farlan asked. Levi walked towards the rest of us. Isabel and I were digging through the clothes. Everything looked sized right.

"I wouldn't over think anything. What's done is done. Brat-" Levi looked down at me.

"Yes Mister Levi?" I asked still rather excitedly.

"What the hell are you waiting for? Go see if those shitty clothes fit."

I gathered my uniform and almost skipped towards the bathroom. It didn't take me long dispose of my own dingy attire. I fumbled with finding the correct opening in the shirt but from there everything came together nicely.

I grabbed a nearby box and shuffled it towards the mirror. I couldn't wait to see myself.

I glanced at my reflection and I gleamed from ear to ear.

Aside from the bruises and a few cuts I looked pretty darn good. I rotated my shoulders around to get a better view. I still had Levi's jacket but underneath was that new shirt. Gosh, it smelled of pure freshness.

Then as I looked closer I realized that the shirt wasn't the same hue as the others. It had a slight _bluish tint._ I stumbled off the box. My feet slammed the floor.

"You alright, Elke?" Farlan asked from behind the door. I panted from being startled.

"I-I'm fine," I said. I took a hard gulp before climbing back up. Surely, that wasn't true. I starred again, and there it was, the same blue top. Just like…

"Amara-" I breathed heavily.

 _"People change, Elke."_ I felt her whisper tickle my head. Then that's when she appeared next to me. Her stained dress was still covering her. That open wound to her stomach was still visible. I shook.

"You're not real."

Amara smirked, _"You've changed."_ She danced that purple ribbon around my face. The smudge of blood stained my lips, like before. In the reflection she tugged at my eye patch. _"Let's see it."_ I felt my hand obeying her command as it began to flip that dark flap over my head.

I couldn't speak.

The horrified tears streamed from both of my eyes.

 _"Blue is definitely your color."_ Amara pulled the skin around the rim of my socket. There was no pain, no bruised flesh, no purple veins, and no milk eye. The vision wasn't surrounded by darkness. I could see flickering shadows and defined outlines of objects. Amara glowed her vibrant hue. I was shocked.

I looked absolutely normal.

Except for the icy blue iris that hung in my right eye.

 _"Tell me again, why we were such fine experiments?"_

* * *

 **Oh wow, lots of details here.**

 **Wonder how many of you saw that coming?**

 **Our dear Elke, what's come of you?**

 **Scary stuff ahead!**

 **I warned you ;)**

 **~Enked**


	11. A Word from Enked

**Hey Everyone,**

 **Sorry not a chapter update (well not yet)**

However, just thought I would make an announcement that I've created a _**Forum**_ just for all of us crazy fan fiction lovers (you know..the ones that don't need sparkling vampires to enjoy a good read lol)

Forum: **FanFiction Mistfits** AS BEEN TEMPORARILY MOVED to **Attack on Titan** section under forums. It's just there so everyone can find it :)

I've talked with the majority of you behind the scenes and everyone is bad ass and totally awesome and I figured we needed a place to come together to chat and talk up some new ideas :) Anything is allowed! Topics, Suggests, advice, contests, links for artwork etc.

Hopefully with **FullmetalDeadman93** help we can start some contests and a chain link story (plot/characters will be discussed) where people can write sections or chapters and we combined them all. Everyone will get credit and is a great opportunity to have fun and get a feel for writing with a great group of people. We can make things fun or serious totally up to others.

Well, hope to see everyone introducing themselves this week or next!

Keep it real peeps,

Enked!

 _Questions PM anytime!_


	12. Das Belegtes Brötchen

**Author's Note: Sorry for the long delay. Anyway, this chapter focuses on Elke's growth. There is tons of symbolism and emotional connections in here. This chapter was written specifically to be geared up for the next.**

 **Special thanks to User:** ** _WhiteTigarEye_** **who was the winner from last contest (she guessed all the symbolism from the first dream). As promised she has her personal OC placed into our Story.**

 **I think everyone will like the character-she plays a significant role.**

 **P.S..I'm not sure of the proper spelling of "Hanji's name" I seen it spelled two ways. I'm spelling it as "Hanji" from now on. Sorry if it disturbs anyone.**

 **Enjoy.**

* * *

 **Der Rüpel**  
Chapter X :Das Belegtes Brötchen

* * *

It had been several weeks, perhaps a month since I had actually dined on _human flesh._

I had decided to keep the incident to myself. I figured it was in everyone's best interest not to know about my secret. I couldn't imagine Mister Levi handling that news well. Luckily, Hanji had made a completely ridiculous statement regarding my injured knees. She had gone off screaming in madness to the others, claiming I had astonishing healing abilities. When they came to see me, the only difference they saw was there wasn't a bloody mess.

 **The open wounds still remained.**

 **Stitches were still needed.**

 **Levi was still annoyed.**

Aside from that particular evening, life had resolved itself and I was finally getting treated fairly. My job as messenger became a daily task. I worked from sunrise till sunset with no complaints. Why would I? I got to stretch my legs, greet fellow soldiers, and mostly got to be apart of the place we called, _home._ For once, I felt important.

Lunch was my only break. Though it was more than just a time for chow; it was a moment to see everyone and chat about the day. I mostly listened and occasionally would ask a question, and I wouldn't miss it for a second. As I thought about it, my eyes instinctively starred into the blinding sun. It's fiery round face burned into mine. I could feel the heat being trapped inside my boots, long pants, jacket, and not to mention the suffocating eye patch were all a bother. I let out a sigh and did my best to shake the sweat that wanted to seep out my skin.

"Better hurry," I whispered to myself. I jogged down the town's rocky path while my saddled bag bounced at my hip. It was all very familiar, except for the part that I had decided to be _deviant_ today and pass into town on my own. In all fairness, I just wanted to complete my run before noon. Once these final envelopes were delivered I would have the rest of the day off. Which meant more hours with my caretakers and I was in no objection to that deal. I just prayed to the heavens that Levi would never find out. Otherwise…my shoes were going to magically have no soles. _Yes, that was his threat to me._

I slowed near the town's main street.

I couldn't read well, so I did the next best thing and went by memory; also known as landmarks. I took a deep breath and sped my way down a recognizable alleyway. It wasn't too dark and it was littered with so many pedestrians from kids to adults, that no one could feel alone. Everyone seemed to be enjoying the sunny day. All right I'll admit I was breaking an extremely important rule. Levi was specific when I started this job. I remember those cold narrow eyes starting at me and his deep voice still rang in my head.

 _"Town is off limits, unless accompanied by Farlan, Isabel, or myself. I'm not going to be rallying up a search party for a lost brat. We clear?" Levi asked directly. I fiddled with my fingers._

 _"Mister Levi? Wh-what does ac-accompany mean?"_

 _Levi took a sip from his drink. "Limits you have limits-"_

I veered around a woman and spared her from spilling her basket of goods. I maneuvered my way through the tight walls and vast people. And even received a few cheers from local fans. I was surprised too. Sometimes the town's people weren't always friendly towards us. I remember my guardians correcting a few loud mouths when we went into town once; it wasn't a pleasant sight.

I trotted out of the narrow passage and towards more eye aching light. I took a few more steps before I eased myself to a stop. A slight panic hit me.

I was lost.

My guts twisted at the realization that I may not make it back in time. My mind flashed the horribly scary Levi, with his stern emotionless face after finding out about me leaving HQ. I wanted to melt into the pavement at the thought.

"O-oh I'm s-so dead." I trembled. Now the sweat was really pouring. I pulled at my shirt. I nervously glanced around. Right then left, right, left, and I repeated over and over. Nothing. I didn't see any familiar landmark. I didn't help matters that every darn building had the same color, height, and structure. I bit my lip as I fumbled with the button on my saddled pouch. I fished around for the envelope and pulled it out with wet palms.

I flipped the crisp thick folded paper over and was disappointed to see there wasn't any information that could be useful. The adrenaline inside me soared. I was dead. I was beyond dead; I was going to be mutilated meat roasting on a speared stick. Levi, _Mister Levi_ was going to grill me to the core. I was never going to be allowed to see the light of day again. Forget the shoes, he's going to chop off my feet!

The endless thoughts of punishment swirled inside my head like angry fish. I was growing nauseous. Then suddenly, I looked more closely at the envelope.

There was a name. It wasn't easy to read because of the fancy lettering, but there was something there.

 ** _\\\_** ** _PixisWall_** ** _\\\_**

Normally, there is a destination written on the package. Someone from HQ must have forgotten how delivery works. However, I guess I was going to have to make do with a name. It was my only chance to finish on time. I wiped my brow and continued down the unfamiliar path. It took guts to ask strangers for help. Now, I wasn't only breaking the first rule, but I was disobeying others as well. If I made it to my next birthday, it would be a miracle.

Several denials later, I was still lost.

"Ah shit," I swore. I instantly clamped my hand over my mouth. My eyes were wide. Only Levi could use those words. That was another broken rule. I managed three strikes against me all in one day in less than an hour. I was beyond mortified. My hands tugged at my frazzled hair as I sulked onwards.

"I'll never be forgiven! " I shrieked. I never yelled, but this was the perfect time to demonstrate how large my lungs were. I was on the verge of frustrated tears when I finally collapsed and sprawled myself out on the grainy stone.

I let several by passers stare.

Who cares, I thought.

"I'm dead," I heaved out. I barely clutched the envelope. Part of me wanted to let the darn thing blow away. Then all I had to do was make my way back home. I paused. Then again, I didn't have the first clue where I was. Levi's annoyed face popped into my head. My heart hammered and my stomached dropped.

I heard the scuffs of approaching footsteps.

"You're pretty dramatic aren't ya?" A sweet tone chirped. I lightly flinched before I rolled my head back to see a young girl starring me from above. Her hypnotizing honey colored eyes smiled at me. I sighed.

"I'm going to die, that's why," I stated as plainly as I could. The girl let out a small giggle, her messy red ponytail bounced with her.

"You look pretty healthy to me. Especially compared to some of the other kids around here." She said with a grin on her full cheeks.

I closed my eyes. "You don't know Mister Levi."

"Dad?" She asked.

I shook my head.

"Brother?"

"No."

The girl paused, "caretaker?"

I nodded in distress.

"Not surprised. They can be some of the most uptight. Their pants are always in a bunch for no reason; you know?" The new girl cocked her head with a baffled look. I gazed at her upside down.

"You have one too?" I asked. The girl rolled her eyes lightly.

"Sadly. And more than one." She replied. I couldn't help but let out a small laugh as well. "Say, my name's Isana Frei by the way." I was shocked when she held out her hand. I extended mine.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Elke." I said. We couldn't help but still continue to laugh at the strange situation. Greeting someone upside down was rather untraditional. What would Levi think?

The girl let go of my hand. "Just Elke? You don't have a last name?" I shook my head.

"N-no. Not that I can remember." I reply with a shrug. Isana didn't seem to mind in the least. She waved off the topic as if it never happened. She even helped me to my feet. I had to say, she was much taller than I expected but she wasn't bulky. Instead she was completely skin and bones. Her narrow frame was swallowed in her dingy clothes, a green shirt with brown pants. The girl actually made me feel fat. Though she reminded me of someone from the Underground. She had a sort of a rugged look to her, thin but toned.

"Oh my gosh, where did you steal that outfit!" She screamed in excitement. "The Survey Corp's uniform what a treasure!" She pulled me around at all angles to look me up and down.

I raised a brow. "I didn't steal it. That's where I live. My friends are in training there. I'm just the messenger." I stated modestly. Isana's jaw dropped.

"Y-you work for the Survey Corps?" Doubt stuttered from her tone.

"Yea, i-it's the only job I can do. Mister Levi won't let me use the 3DM gear. He says I'm too small and that I'm a poor listener and will probably hit a tree." I shrugged again.

The girl's eyes twinkled, "It would be a dream come true to see the place on the inside. I can only imagine the endless amount of information stored in there." She gasped, "Does that mean you've seen a Titan?"

I rapidly shook my head. "No. B-but that's what Farlan, Isabel, and Mister Levi do. They go outside the walls. They went there a while ago. They didn't have much to say." I noticed the girl fiddling with her empty woven basket. I cleared my throat to change the topic.

"S-so where do you live?" I asked.

"Oh-" Isana snapped out of her gaze, "I-I live in the orphanage a few blocks down that way. I'm no messenger, but more like a nanny there." She embarrassingly chuckled. I was puzzled. I had never heard of an orphanage before. Sounded fancy.

"Is that where you're caregivers are too?" I asked. She rubbed the back of her head.

"Yup, and all the other kids too. It's a full house sometimes."

"Wow, you're lucky to have friends. Mister Levi doesn't think I should really talk to anyone else." My words drifted.

"You're not supposed to be out here, are you?" Isana stated in a motherly tone. I lowered my head.

"No. And I'm not suppose to be talking to you either." I sadly replied. A warm breeze wiped around us. I let my hair blow around my face.

"Let me guess," She paused. "You're lost." I starred at her in astonishment.

"H-how did you know?"

She polished her knuckles on her shirt. "Twelve years of wisdom and dealing with kids who never know where the bathroom is." Her hands went to her hips as she sighed.

"S-so could you help me find this person?" I asked. Isana took the envelope and began to study it carefully. "I don't know any Pixiswall-" I smeared the words together in one breath. Isana shot me an amused face.

"It's not one word silly. Look-" the older girl pointed to the cursive letters, "It's meant to have a space. It reads, Pixis, space, then Wall. I bet the person you are looking for is him and the location is the Wall." She smiled. I made an 'o' shaped mouth.

"That makes sense," I reply. She handed me the letter and then glanced behind her. She extended her arm down the path.

"If I had to guess, I bet the entrance down there is your answer. I hear them shouting that name all the time. Must be someone important."

I nodded while I stuffed the message back into my bag. My mind was racing. How could I thank her? I was always told to show how grateful I was to those who helped. Except, I didn't have much expect a few coppers. However, I would never make that mistake again. Giving away money was a big no, in Levi's book. Money was only for emergencies. Did this count?

"T-thanks," I mumbled.

Isana patted me on the shoulder. "No problem. That's what friends are for, right?" I starred at her with wide eyes, well the one that could be visible. I was speechless. I hadn't had a friend since Amara. No one close to my age had ever been able to talk to me, let alone be my friend. It was strange feeling, knowing that breaking the rules had actually made me happy. I met someone. And the person wasn't bad or dangerous. She was kind, gentle, and helpful? She never questioned my eye patch or made me feel uneasy. How could Levi not want me to make friends?

"Yea, friends." I replied shyly. The taller girl gave me a final smile before she sent me a wave.

"I'll see you around. Good luck-"

I interrupted her, "W-wait. Would you like to come with me to lunch?" I fiddled with my fingers nervously. What was I saying? Bring a stranger to HQ? Did I have a death wish? I must have because I didn't stop myself from inviting her.

"Really?" She asked in shock. Honestly, little did she know I was more in disbelief that I asked in the first place. For once, I let a small smile.

"S-sure. I just have to hand this package over a-and I'm done for the day." I padded the bag. Isana nearly jumped for joy. I figured, I could somehow explain this. I was just saying thanks, right? The girl hooked arms with me. I had been reserved for so long, been taught to barely show emotion. Everything seemed so foreign. But, this girl, this _friend,_ fueled me with life. I may be dressed like a solider but deep down, I was still a kid.

Ignoring all my worries, I returned another grin. "Let's go!"

"To the Wall!" Isana hollered.

And together we marched to our destination.

* * *

I made my usual salute to the fellow guards.

For some reason, their faces seemed recognizable.

"Message for Pixis." I say with my arm crossed over my chest. The two stern faced guards instantly dropped their war face and greeted me.

"Ah, hello Elke nice to see you." The one man replied.

"How have ya been kiddo?" The other asked.

I raised my chin, "Good thank you for asking. Do you know where I can find Pixis?" I asked in a bit of a hurry. I had told Isana to wait behind a merchant stand until I was finished. The last thing I needed was to be caught mingling with outsiders, at least until I got my story straight. The men nodded leisurely then gestured behind them to the stairs.

"Look for the wrinkly bald guy with a sharp mustache. Can't miss him." The first man says.

"Be careful up there Elke. Training is going on. Don't need you tumbling off the wall now." The second man lightly chuckled. I agreed and was about to thank them when an over excited _friend_ came zooming out from hiding. Her basket had long been discarded.

"Training?" She questioned practically drooling with giddiness. "Oh Elke please let me come! Oh please! I want to see the 3DM gear, the cannons, the blades, the warriors-" The saliva leaked from her lip as she clung to me. This was not supposed to happen, I thought to myself. But how could I say no? She was my new friend. I couldn't throw away her dreams. She explained the entire route to the Wall how she fantasied about meeting a solider. She was a hard-core fan.

 ** _I thought of a lie and I thought it up quick._**

I looked at the guards. "S-she's related to um Hanji." I blurted out. What was I doing? What was I saying! Let's just say the weirdness was explained perfectly. No explanation was needed, since everyone basically avoided any topic or relation with the screwball. It was our free ticket to the top.

Also, it was our first chance to see what lied behind the concrete wall.

It wasn't anything short of _amazing._

Simply picture heaven, that's what we saw as we glanced beyond the puffy clouds and pass the endless fields. Isana and I were stunned by the incredible sight. Eventually our attention was turned to the sounds of the roaring gunfire, shots, and shouts of hustling men. It was thrilling.

"Let's go Elke!" The girl yelled as she danced around the equipment. Her eyes glistened over the shinny metal and she couldn't help but stroke a parked cannon. Her fixation remained only on the machine. I shook my head and decided to finally find the envelope's rightful owner.

I made my way down the Wall and was careful not to get in anyone's way. Though it was exciting to see the soldiers in action, it was also daunting to see their intensity. I jogged onward until I came to a cluster of individuals. One man in particular stood out. His feet rested on the very end of the Wall's edge and were slurping a liquid out of a round jug of some sorts. The main give away was the sparkling head that twinkled under the sun.

I politely made my way passed the crowed and addressed him in the same proper manor. With a straight back I saluted him.

"Message for Pixis." I said with a clear voice. The man's raisin like features rolled into a warm smile.

"Ah, was wondering when my delivery would get here." He spoke gently. I retrieved the large folded paper and handed it to him.

"Sorry for being late Sir. I got lost on the way."

The man laughed, "Ah no need to be sorry, solider. You're early in fact. I didn't expect this message until tomorrow. Surprised to see it today. What a fine messenger they've chosen." He tucked the package inside his jacket. I let the pride of a job well done glow outwards.

"Thank you very much, Sir."

"I've always said they need young hearts for this job. And have I heard a great deal about you, Miss Elke, the girl with one eye, who can melt any soldier's heart. That's quite a reputation you have." He said as he took another swig. His drink dribbled a bit down his chin. I pinched my brows.

"Well I-I don't mean to, Sir. I'm just the messenger."

"You're a special kid, Elke. You're just like _him_ don't forget your past little **Ruffian** its who you are-" He quietly mumbled to me. I was about to question him when my eyes caught sight of a nightmare come true. I nearly fainted. My face went completely ghost white and I was sure my stomach disintegrated. As I peered around him, my eyes noticed the all too familiar ebony undercut of … _Mister Levi._

Fear exploded from my chest.

"I-I've got to g-go" I stuttered robotically. I didn't give the man time to ask, I quickly saluted and spun on my heels in the opposite direction. There was no time to think. I bolted down the stony wall and made my way back towards Isana. As she came into view I saw her standing not alone but with Commander Hanji. I nearly died from an onset blood clot. Why? How? Why would my prayers go unanswered? I was too young to end up in a man-dug hole. My face started to sweat all my worries right out of my pores.

I was going to be sick.

"Hey Elke what brings you up here?" The giggly Commander asked. Isana followed behind her with admiration dripping out of her lips. I stood frozen with stiff shoulders.

"I-I was just uh-" I began to say but was interrupted when a pair of footsteps stopped abruptly next to me. I would recognize those polished toes anywhere.

"Yes, I would love to hear this explanation as well." Levi asked in his usual monotone, non-thrilled voice. I was toast. Maybe I could jump off the wall?

My throat choked, "Um I was d-doing m-my j-job Sir." Out of the corner of my eye I watched as Levi crossed his arms. My veins swelled.

"You know that's not my question brat. Don't sass me," he said. I cracked my lips to speak but a hero shining behind her goggles jumped to my aid instead.

"Oh shorty, Elke was with me. Don't be such a fun sucker. I asked her to tag along to show my niece, Isana here, a good time. I figured they could see the Wall together since its such a nice day, huh?" Hanji replied in a calm tone. I know my jaw dropped but the Commander sent a wink ensuring me about the situation.

"Tch, whatever." Levi then placed a hand on my head, "Just tell me about it next time." I looked up at him with a wide smile.

"Will do, Sir."

He starred at me for a moment, then knelt down and took a cloth from inside of his jacket. I stood perfectly still as he wiped the apples of my cheeks.

"You are such a messy brat." I still smiled as he finished. He and I looked at each other for a moment. Just he and I feeling the light breeze touch our skin. The open endless sky hung above us. The forever rolling greens trailed below, passed the brick wall. It was hope, for us, for the future. Without thinking, I wrapped my arms around his neck as I nuzzled my face into him. I didn't care if he didn't return the hug. All that mattered, in my mind was he deserved to know how much I appreciated him.

"Thank you for everything, Mister Levi." I whispered in his ear. I expected nothing more than for him to brush off my words. Maybe even shove me away? I never would have guessed he would do the opposite. His arms wrapped around me and hugged me right back. His limbs held me tightly.

"You're such a clingy thing." He quietly said back. The warmth inside me grew. I knew Levi well enough to know those were his caring words. I could handle that. I pulled back and noticed a crowd of people starring. But I figured neither of us was bothered by it. Besides, I was doing the right thing. I was showing my gratitude towards the man who saved me countless of times. The location only added to the surreal moment. And naïve as I was, I thought it would never end. I thought the happiness would only grow from there.

"Elke!" I heard the familiar holler of my other angel. I spun around and was greeted with a grinning red head in short pigtails. She ran at me and then pounced. Her arm swung around my neck as we roared with laughter. It wasn't surprising when we toppled to the ground. Thankfully Levi got out of the way in time.

"Isabel! Are you done with training?" I asked eagerly. She nodded.

"You bet! This girl is ravenous for lunch. Right, Levi-bro?"

Levi sighed, "You are always hungry." The two of us laughed hysterically as we rolled on the ground. The dark haired solider stood with crossed arms, his face returned to the usual dull expression. Only Isabel and I could appreciate his cold demeanor.

"Seems as though I'm late to the joke. Did Levi try to clean again?" I gasped when I saw the familiar sandy strains of hair and soft eyes.

"Farlan!" I squealed as he came forward.

"Hey kiddo, you done dusting the ground with your back?" He laughed. I held out my arms as he reached forward and pulled me up. I clung around his neck as he rested my weight on his side. His hand instantly ruffled my bangs. "You hungry?" He asked.

"Starved!" Both Isabel and I shouted together.

Farlan couldn't control his laugh and I could have sworn Levi even held back a small smile.

* * *

Lunch was not the usual. Farlan had decided that a picnic would suit the day better. It didn't seem real. We were able to sit under the blue sky with the birds as we ate. I got to feel the blades of grass tickle my skin. The bees buzzed around and the trees swayed. It was magical.

Hanji and helped pack the goods and soon we were accompanied by several other cadets. Before long, our small gathering had grown into nearly the entire HQ. It was a fantastic rowdy time. Isana didn't have a problem fitting in. Hanji and her made a great team. No one would have guessed they weren't related. Between the hair similarities and the love for science, there was no need to worry.

Isabel and I wolfed down our **sandwiches** and decided on a wrestling match. We scuffled, rolled around, and I would out run her at any chance I got. Isana soon joined, followed by Hanji, Farlan, and a few others. Even after a hard days work we all came together and managed to enjoy the peaceful time.

My friend and I would sneak up on Isabel and tackled her to the soft ground. The three of us would be in a mid way wrestling when Farlan would come scoop me up and throw me over his shoulder. We all laughed and several times Farlan would engaged me in a tickle fight and have me crying in tears from the belly aches. I ran around the open field like a newborn foal first time frolicking. I never got tired.

Then I noticed Levi. Unlike everyone else he leaned against the thick bark of the picnic tree. He was starring off, at what I wasn't sure. I never could understand him. I always had to ask. And today wouldn't be any different. I crept towards him, ready to spring a sneak attack, expect Levi had eyes in the back of his head.

"Don't even think about it," He said. I let out an over dramatic sigh.

"You're too good for this game Mister Levi." I replied as I leaned against the tree with him. His gaze still starred in a direction other than me. I was puzzled. What had his attention so badly?

I looked around him. "What are you looking at Mister Levi?" I asked. Levi didn't respond instantly. I waited for what seemed to be an eternity. Then he let out a deep breath. His crystal grey orbs fell upon me like a magical spell. They may be unsettling to some, but to me, they were calming and sense of confidence. I felt, as though he was completely misunderstood. And I figured if the others and I didn't stand by him, then who would? Then again, I would be lost without them, without him. We were all separate pieces of a puzzle that somehow found each other and all fit.

"Are you happy here?" Levi asked me directly. I paused for a moment, toyed with my lip, and then shrugged.

"Yea, of course I am," I leaned back, "I haven't been happier. I have food, a bed, and the best family I could have asked for. I'm very happy here, Sir."

Levi's eyes slightly widened. "Family?" A light blush appeared over my cheeks. I didn't mean to say that, I thought. The worms of nerves wiggled through me.

"I-I-" I began to explain but thankfully didn't have to finish as Farlan and Isabel decided to join. Levi returned to his normal gaze.

"Oi, where have you been?" Levi asked.

Farlan gestured to a different crowd of soldiers. "There, talking with some new trainees. A few were interested in our back-story. Especially that girl Petra; I think that was her name? She was curious where we learned our 3DM abilities."

"Ha, she was jealous to know we were self taught, might I add." Isabel boasted proudly. Levi made his usual annoyed sound.

"You shouldn't be saying anything to anyone. We could get caught, exposed then we'll be sent back." Our leader's words were grim. Isabel snorted.

"As if they don't know Levi-bro." I watched Levi as he remained fixated on a distant solider with blonde hair. His mood darkened.

"He's always watching." Levi replied sternly. I stepped next to Levi and unzipped my jacket.

"It's ok Levi Sir. Y-you can have the shield if you want. It will always protect you." I wave the flaps of the leather. My guardian shakes his head.

"Keep it. It's for you only." He states. Farlan then pipes up.

"Oh that reminds me." I turn to face him just as he is pulling out a small treasure from his own pocket. He kneels down in front of me and holds out a small dainty black strap. "Here's a little present from Isabel and I. We figured Levi had already given you his special gift, your jacket, so we wanted to do the same."

My eyes went wide in astonishment as he held the object out in his palms. It was the most exquisite thing I had ever seen. My heart fluttered as I looked at the fine detail. Attached to the black leather was a small purple ribbon like bow with a silver pin of the freedom crest pitched to the material. And dangling off of that was a strung tiny beige feather. I swallowed roughly.

"I-is that-?" I tried to ask but couldn't.

"You bet; it's the same feather. I found it before we came up here. I guess your friend wanted you to keep your promise, huh?" Isabel said as she poked me with her elbow. I could barely talk.

"T-thank you. Thank you so much. Its-its-"

Farlan walked behind me and looped the new crafted trinket around my neck. I felt the fabric gently tighten around my throat. The feather graced my neck. She was still with me, Amara. I turned around to him. He came back to my eye level and looked me over.

"You don't need to thank us. Besides, you needed something to fit that charming self of yours. You look so beautiful Elke. Maybe others will see that instead of that eye patch." Farlan said to me. I gave a small twirl.

"I don't mind. It's who I am. But now I'm a mix of all of you, which means I look twice as good." I laugh.

"I don't know Levi, sounds like she's getting her looks from you." Farlan too let out another chuckle. I mimicked Levi's crossed arms and stiff body. I placed a serious brow on my face and tried to hold back a grin. Isabel was about to burst. Levi glanced at my impression of himself. His own brow arched.

"Tch, I'm not _that_ short."

No one said a word.

* * *

The sun began to set. I had long since waved good-bye to Isana. Hanji was kind enough to take her _niece_ back home and the remainder of the food (Isana's basket was spilling over). The other soldiers were bunking in for the night and I assumed we would be doing the same. The four of us were heading back to HQ when Isabel stopped mid way. I didn't realize the halt until I slammed into her back.

I blinked rapidly, "What's wrong?" I asked somewhat tired. The young girl stomped her foot while she placed her hands on her hips. She spun around to the rest of us. I could always tell when she had a plot in her head. Her determined eyes always gave it away.

"Elke you're coming with me." She said. Before I knew it, my wrist was grabbed and I was being hauled away from the center of the courtyard.

"Uh o-ok." I said as my feet stumbled across the dirt floor. She was moving fast, I had to take double strides to keep up. "W-where are we going?"

"Isabel wait!" Farlan called.

"Isabel bring that brat back here." Levi sounded furious but still Isabel dragged me onward.

I swallowed, "Uh Isabel i-is this a good idea?" Isabel huffed and yanked me towards a shadowed covered building. It was small but elongated in length. Its sides were boarded with wood and grey stone. The roof was slate in color and slanted slightly over the wall. The older girl pulled me around to the front. The sounds of stomping and grinding teeth filled the air. I could hear loud snorts and the strong smell of alfalfa. I knew where we were.

A smile stretched across my cheeks. "Can I pet him? Can I?" I pleaded eagerly. Isabel gave me the thumbs up and unlocked the stable door. I didn't hesitate to venture into the stall. Isabel's mount, the silver gelding, turned his head to greet me. He softly nickered when I stroked his face. Normally, I would have a treat for him but today he would have to make do with a good pat. I rubbed his jaw and then his muscular neck and even ran my fingers through his choppy grey mane. Aside from Isabel, he and I had become quite the friends.

"Ready to ride, Elke?" Isabel whispered. I turned around to see her holding her riding tack.

"Really? Won't we get in trouble?" I asked rather worried. My caretaker walked passed me.

"Not if they can't catch us." Isabel snickered then threw the saddle on the horse's back. She began tightening the girth and inserting the bit. The horse chomped on the metal mouthpiece. She led the gelding out of his stall and then asked him for a whoa. The antsy horse pawed the ground.

"Alright, Elke leg up like I taught you." Isabel said. I did as I was told and put my right calf into her palms and instantly I was thrown up onto the saddle. I gripped the horse's shaggy hair and waited as Isabel mounted behind. Little did the other two know that Isabel and I had been sneaking out on late nights and practicing.

"Isabel get her off that crazy animal." Levi threatened as he and Farlan came jogging up. I starred down from above. The wind kissed my face and blew my hair in a messy fashion.

"Eh, she's fine. She's with me!" Isabel shot back.

"Please Mister Levi. Please just this once." I begged. Levi clicked his tongue and looked at Farlan. The tall man sighed.

"Wait for us." He said. We were all stunned and I don't think Levi even expected himself to be on the back of his horse at this hour. But we all were. All four of us were heading off into the dark underbrush of the night. The moonlight guided us down the winding road as we rode beyond HQ's dirt correl. The trees greeted us with their waving limbs and rustling leaves.

"Tch, the shit you guys drag me into. Brat, sit back and keep your damn hands on the saddle. Isabel make sure-" Levi growled.

"Their fine Levi they're only walking." Farlan chuckled from behind. Isabel perked up from the saddle.

"Ha, as if! Ready Elke?" Isabel shouted then spurred the horse forward. The gelding didn't hesitate to break from his eager prance into a speedy gallop. My fingers quickly gripped the saddle and my shoulders were shoved backwards. My gums flapped against the intense wind. We had never moved this fast before and I felt my heart pounding explosively at each beat of the horse's hooves.

"Slow that damn horse down! Isabel-!" Levi commanded as he sped his horse to catch up. Farlan managed to do the same. Soon all three horses were neck and neck flying down the green path of the forest. Their blowing snorts and thundering feet filled the air as the reins were loosen. Each mount tried to out run the other. I looked to see Levi's concerned face. I smiled and hollered in excitement.

"This is amazing!" I yelled over the stampede of the horses. I let my arms glide to the sides of me. The thrill was unbelievable. I felt as though there were no limits just freedom. Farlan howled with Isabel as we continued on our journey. We let the horses carry us for a ways before everyone reined them back. Their heavy lungs broke down to a trot as they were steered off the road. Eventually we came to a clearing and in sight was a small hill that was positioned well under the moon.

Farlan helped me dismount. The horses were left to graze while we made our way up the vacant nature made seat. I plopped down on the grass and was instantaneously engrossed with the night's sky and it's twinkling gems. I heard the others join me. It didn't take long for everyone to be lying on their backs with eyes mesmerized by the things above.

"Beautiful huh?" Isabel said breaking the silence. I nodded as I sat between the two guys. I let my lungs fill with the fresh scent of the summer season.

"I never want to go back." I reply. Farlan looked at me with his arms underneath his head. I could see a small grin creeping on his face.

"We all have to go to bed sometime, Elke." He said with a humorous tone.

"I know," I say as I rolled onto my elbows. "I mean, I don't want to go back there; underground. I want to stay here with the sun and the birds. Everything is better here. The people are nice, the place is huge, and I love being a Scout. We all have jobs here. And-and we are always together which is the best part."

Isabel agreed, "I love it here too. We're going to stay here forever. You'll see Elke you will never go back there. Ever." I sat up and looked over Farlan's body to the determined girl. Her hazel eyes sparkled at me.

"Really?" I asked. Farlan sat up as well. His short hair caught the movement of the gentle breeze. His blue eyes fell upon me.

"Absolutely. You're never going there because you're stuck with us now, kiddo." He smiled as he ruffled my hair then smoothed his hand down the side of my face. I felt his fingers tugged at my eye patch's strings. Suddenly the tension was gone from my face and I could feel the rim of my brow collecting the whispers from the wind. I wasn't worried, my eye had long since returned to that undesirable milky white. But still I felt I was free from the shackles of disguise. The black patch disappeared inside of his pocket.

"Promise? You have to swear to it." I reply as I hold up my right hand and leave my pinkie up. Farlan didn't hesitate to raise both his arms with his smallest fingers raised.

"I'll double swear to it." He said to me as we locked our digits. We may have parted our signature swears to one another but I couldn't help embracing him into a hug. His chest was always filled with tenderness and affection. I could find peace and comfort in his grasp. He was the one to sing to me on cloudy days and chase away the nightmares from a sleepless rest. Farlan never took a wrong step. A thug, a solider, an angel; it didn't matter who he was. He was Farlan, my best friend, my brother, and my guardian. I loved him all the same.

"We'll always be together, right?" I mumbled as my words were caught in his clothes. I felt a heavy hand stroke the back of my hair.

"Always kiddo." Farlan hummed.

I looked over his shoulder, "Always Isabel?"

"You couldn't get rid of us if you tried. Always Elke," Isabel shot me her normal large smile. I believed her fully. My head twisted around to the quite Levi. He sat with his one arm on his raised leg. His mind again, lost in thought. I crawled out of Farlan's grasp and laid my arms over the back of Levi's shoulders. I rested my chin onto of his silky hair.

"Mister Levi?"

Levi jolted from his gaze, "Hm?"

I pulled my chin away and leaned near his cheek with my weight pressed to his back. He never seemed to mind anymore, the childish things I did. We had all grown so close. That's right; four strangers came together and showed everyone that regardless of the past we could still be a family. We were all different yet the same on the inside.

"We'll be together forever right?" The solider then sighed.

"Tch sure." He said bluntly. I leaned further down.

"The four of us always, ok? You won't ever leave will you Mister Levi? You'll stay here with us. You have to stay, otherwise it wouldn't be the same." I explain to him. I feel the muscles in his back relax. His head slightly turns my way.

"I'm not going anywhere brat. I can assure you I don't want to see that shit hole anymore than you do." He states matter of factly. I hug him tighter.

"Promise?" I can see him look pass me and towards the others. The hesitation was clear but I waited patiently for his response. I _always_ did.

"Come here," He says and motions we with his open arms. I sit on his lap as he wraps a loose arm around me. I lean my back against his solid chest and we both look to the sky. I could see the gems still dancing against the darkness.

"I don't like making promises. But-" He clears his throat. "For you, I _promise_ we will always be together. You have my word, Elke." Levi eventually led my heart to rest happily at the sound of reassurance. If Levi swore to the oath it had to stay true. Our leader kept order and this was a sealed agreement, now nothing would come between us. We made it through so much already. I felt as though nothing could touch us.

 _I thought we were invincible._

"And I promise I won't ever leave either. You have my word Mister Levi." I say as I make my salute towards my leader. I saw that faint smile appear again. And before I knew it Levi pulled me close and quietly placed a faint kiss on my forehead. I sunk into his hold and savored our precious moment.

"You're such a busy brat. You better stay awake on the way back, because I don't want to have to carry you to your bed again. You weigh too damn much." Levi grumbled.

I smiled, "Yes, Sir."

A twinkling light shot across the sky at that moment.

If only we had all know to have wished upon it.

Maybe things would have turned out better.

* * *

 **What a difficult chapter!**

 **I struggled with this particular section for weeks. Though I was battling home life issues and lack of motivation. I finally managed to complete it.**

 **I hope readers enjoyed the lighthearted chapter.**

 **Everything was placed accordingly. As mentioned, this was laid out to show not only Elke's growth but her caretakers as well. The incredible bond they share is something young Elke hasn't had. This is precious to her in many ways and to our cold hearted Levi as well.**

 **So what happens when things turn upside down?**

 **It's going to twist a few guts for sure, because we all know what's coming.**

 **Thanks a million again, to everyone who comments and favs. I honestly, never thought anyone would like this story and it's done my heart good to know there are a few who appreciate in depth fanfiction's of trust and friendship.**

 **Stay tuned!**

 **~Enked.**


	13. Reader's vote

**Notice: I have updated a small section to the first chapter. It was written to "fit" the new plot to this insane story. Sorry couldn't make a new chapter and post before it. So I just made the "prologue" blend into the first chapter. Its not major miss if you don't read…but when the story ends it might make more sense.**

* * *

Alright everyone it's a reader's vote situation here.

So, I'm about 60% done with the next chapter.

The situation is, it's shaping up to be an extremely long section. It's already over 15 pages and it's not even close to being done.

With that being said…would readers like me to divide up the chapter and make it two separate pieces?

The front of this chapter has a bit of a time gap with purposeful missing pieces (to make it more interesting) and its got heavy amounts of dialogue to lead up to the ending of the chapter.

I was planning on making it one giant emotional gut wrenching train wreak, however not sure if all readers want to sit down for such a long time to read the work. That's when I figured I would ask the readers themselves.

 ***Note regardless of choice picked must give my editor time to do her magic ;)**  
Option 1: Divide Chapter into 2 sections (warning could upset the mood of the chapter)  
Option 2: Wait another week or more and post the entire chapter as a whole (warning will be extremely long)

Please everyone, if you could give your vote it would be super helpful! Also, it would beneficial to me for future chapters. Are readers ok with long chapters?

Would like to make things easier or better for my viewers.

Thanks much everyone!

P.S…please don't hate me, I promise to return everyone's Pm's, reviews, and other inbox chat later this week! Classes started back and I can barely keep my head above water. I still love you all, you're like my family here. I haven't forgotten about anyone! Thanks a million xoxox

 **UPDATE as of 1/25: Readers can have the choice if they want to read the next chapter (just part I). It is not edited and has some time gaps but should still be somewhat clear. Please note, it will be at least another 2 weeks before the entire thing is complete.**

 **Send me a Deviant Art message at-** **"Enk Pen" (username) and I will send you the read. But you can't spoil it for others ;) Deal?**

~Enked


	14. Träume 2

I dreamed a **dream** …

I'm sinking.

First my ankles, then my knees, now my neck.

It's red; its a sea of crimson water. The more I struggle the more it rises. I can hear Amara she's laughing at my panic state. There's nothing but an empty darkness and the red sea.

Then suddenly I see it, I see them.

My heart crumbles, my throat swells, as the water's tainted waves crash into my cheeks. I gasp for air and suddenly the sound of a shattering glass echoes deep from the depths of my mind.

And all at once, the horrendous cries from hundreds of throats screeches against my ears.

"Elke!" a voice shouts. I wake in a sweat and the turning of a sick stomach.

Amara, she's still laughing.

* * *

 **Please proceed to the next chapter -**


	15. Haferbrei

**Alright readers, here's the thing…**

 **This chapter is drastically growing in size so…**

 **Against everyone's wishes, I decided to go ahead and post Part I of the main climax. Before everyone screams and throws rocks at me… I've done this before with my other stories and trust me…it spares readers from being crossed eyed from too much.**

 **Also, I'm still working on some bugs with my editor to make this a great piece. So enjoy this for now! Lord knows when I will get to second half done.**

 **So enjoy this early treat!**

* * *

 **Der Rüpel**  
Chapter XI :Haferbrei

* * *

Ever since the horrendous nightmare my thoughts were not able to rest.

For the entire seven days that lead up to their second expedition, beyond the walls, I pestered and begged them not to leave. I was fully aware of how irritating I had become, but I could not help fighting against the dark cloud that followed us. Something wasn't right, though at the time I was too young to fully understand.

"Please don't go." I repeated again, for the one-millionth time that day. I scrambled my way around the room, as Farlan and Levi were getting ready for another usual day. Isabel had an unexpected call from her squad leader (to perform stable duties) and thus left me to be babysat by the 'guys' early that morning. I figured it was the perfect opportunity to drive home the clear fact that it wasn't safe for them to leave. However, to my dismay they both kept swatting the warning away as if it was some bothersome fly.

It left my gut sick with worry.

I quickly snatched Levi's uniform jacket off the chair and out of his reach. I hid the material slightly behind my side. My eyes pleaded with him. Levi narrowed his brows at me.

"I'm not playing this game. Give me my damn jacket now or-"

I loudly stomped my foot on the wooden floorboards. I had never been so flustered in my life. Why wouldn't they listen to me? I swallowed roughly.

"No!" I practically yelled. "Not until you promise me you won't leave. You can't leave. Please stay here." I could see Levi holding back a few curses and a growl. He was fed up with my whining, as he told me a few days ago. Farlan, the usual peacekeeper, strolled over while he fixed his shirt. His soft face smiled at me.

"Elke, it's going to be alright. It was just a dream, a nightmare remember? That's nothing too abnormal for you, we've discussed this; its all in your head ok?" He said as he placed a hand near my hair. I pushed his touch away and dared to step back. I was that desperate to get my message across.

"Stop it! Why won't you believe me?" I asked on the verge of tears. I was just as tired talking about it as they were hearing it. The expedition wasn't going to be anything but a disaster. How could I make them understand? I couldn't replay the dream reel. I couldn't project what I saw that night. They just had to trust me.

Levi marched towards me. "Because you're acting like a spoiled brat. I thought I taught you better behavior. Demanding and fussing over our decisions like this. Since when have you ever made the damn calls?" Levi leaned a ways down before swiping his jacket from my grasp. He pulled his arms through the material and adjusted the collar. "That's right, never." He spat at me. I felt the lump forming in my throat.

"Mister Levi p-please. I just don't want anything to happen. I don't mean to be annoying. I-I just don't want to lose you or Farlan o-or Isabel-" I whimpered as the first tear fell. I felt terrible. I knew keeping the topic going was wrong, but I also knew letting them go was even more so. My heart felt torn in two. Farlan shook his head towards Levi.

"Come on, no tears." Farlan said as he placed a hand on my shoulder. "Elke, you know we have a job to do. You said to us before how much you like it here. You want to stay don't you?"

I didn't look at him but nodded in agreement. Farlan kneeled down in front of me before he rubbed my cheek.

"Well, in order to do so we have to fulfill these duties. By doing what we are asked puts food in your belly and gives you a bed at night. Nothing is free Elke. You will understand one day when you're older, independent, and doing your own thing without us-"

I shot my wide watery eyes at him. "No! No, I don't ever want to be alone. I don't want to get older. I don't want you to go beyond the walls. I don't care about the food or the bed. We can go back where there is no sun. I don't care! J-just don't leave." I wrapped my arms around him and dug my face into his shoulder.

Farlan held me and sighed, "Alright that was a bad example." I heard another pair of ridged boots making their way towards us.

"Brat, you have messages to deliver. Get your butt going before I cut a hole in your bag." Levi said calmly. I wasn't sure what ignited the fiery anger in me but I didn't hesitate to pull myself away from Farlan. I stormed over to the lower bunk, picked up the leather pack and threw it aggressively at Levi's feet.

"Go ahead! Cut it; throw it away. Ground me from running the messages. I don't care! I'll stay here forever if it means you will not go. Please, please don't go!" I begged as I pulled the hair around my face. Hot tears poured down my chilled skin. I would do anything to keep them from going. I would let Levi chain me to the bed with out food if it would stop what was to come. Nothing else mattered to me.

Even Levi seemed a bit shocked.

Farlan gradually rose to his feet. His expression wasn't far from his friend's. I was prepared to be scolded, maybe even disciplined for my actions. But I told myself: I would refuse to back down. I clenched my fists bravely.

"Go ahead Mister Levi. It's not important to me if it means loosing you." I said as I stared up at him. My heart pounded intensely. The dark headed solider remained deadly quiet. I trembled as he made his way over to me. This is it, I thought, I'm going to get my sassy mouth rinsed.

"Fine. Now go wash up so we can head down for breakfast. I'm not going to miss getting my tea this time because of your slow butt." Levi muttered.

I didn't even blink. I was speechless.

Levi raised a brow. "Do I need to repeat myself? Hurry up," he ordered. I heard Farlan stutter a few mumbles until Levi shot him a quick glance. I hadn't noticed the silent 'shh' since I was too preoccupied by my guardian's agreement. I couldn't believe it.

"Y-you mean it?" I asked.

Levi's stern face relaxed and his eyes drifted. "Tch, you're wasting time," he complained as he made his way towards the door. His hand rested on the brass handle. "If your hands are not washed in sixty seconds, you're going to be sipping that burnt coffee as your meal for the rest of-"

"Yes Sir!" I hollered as I ran to the bathroom's sink.

* * *

Breakfast always seemed to be the chattiest part of the day.

I wasn't entirely sure why. I was hardly awake at that hour. Four a.m. wasn't on a nine year old's clock schedule. Even after that eventful morning, I still slumped over the table bench and nearly had my forehead in my sloppy bowel of **porridge**. I felt more exhausted than usual. The sleepless-worried- filled nights were starting to drain the life out of me.

I felt exactly like a walking dead person.

What were they called again?

Zombie. Ah that's right, I resembled the sunken eyes, messy hair, and hunched over dragging body. All I needed to do was moan a bit more and I would have fit the description perfectly. My lids began to close.

"Elke." I heard a gentle voice ring my ears. "Elke, sit up kiddo. Come on you're about to spill the bowl over." I slightly groaned when I felt Farlan pull my head up. With drowsy eyes I watched him slide the food away from me. The muscles in my neck strained as though my skull had grown to the size of one of the cannon balls. As soon as he let go, my face smashed into table. I could sleep upside down at this point. I was too relieved to care how I looked.

All that mattered was they were staying here. Isabel, Farlan, and Levi weren't leaving. The wall's gates may open, but they weren't going to follow. Suddenly, heavy snores escaped my lips. Finally, I could rest in peace.

"Elke-"

I heard Levi's cup set on the table. "Let her sleep. She's been fencing with her thoughts for too many nights. Isabel told me she hasn't slept since that stupid nightmare. Surprised Isabel is even functioning. The brat's been keeping her up with her ridiculous shit."

I listened quietly as I now pretended to be counting sheep.

Farlan then let out a sigh, "She's been through a lot Levi. Imagine if we knew more about her past. I'm sure it's nothing short of hair raising. Seriously, what kid her age has a blind eye and no memory behind the couple of days we met her? You know she wasn't in the hands of Saints."

"None of us were. We know the hardships of life. All of us were from that underground shit hole. We all struggled to even find a crumb, that damn kid is lucky, we threw her one." Levi said before he took a sip.

"Ever felt the back of her head?"

"Tch, what are you talking about?"

Farlan hesitated. "She's got a massive raised scar back there. I've tried to see it, but every time I go near it she flinches or makes an excuse to leave. I only noticed it when I've held her. It's the strangest thing."

"Probably just an old injury. Nothing we wouldn't know about, either."

"She's nine, Levi."

"Everyone has a troubled past. We were no exception. I wasn't in the best shape at that age. I survived. Shit happens, you just have to deal with it and move on." Levi said.

I forced a few louder snores.

"I know. I just don't want her to have to endure what we had to. No kid should feel unwanted or unsafe. Every child needs guidance, a protector, or someone whose eyes light up when they come home. They're all the necessities to raise a confident healthy person." Farlan replied. I heard him scoop a few spoonfuls of food.

"Sounds like you've put a lot of though into this. I'm somewhat hesitant to ask, but seems rather unavoidable. You're planning to take on this task permanently aren't you?" Levi asked with a low whisper. I wanted to blurt out a, 'what does that mean' but refrained from exposing myself. I was undercover at the grown up table and listening to adult details. I figured I could ask later.

"If you mean legally then yes." Farlan said confidently.

"That's quite a hassle, a life changing decision you've made."

"It's a path I wish to walk. Isabel agrees as well. Besides, I could never abandon her. She needs someone."

"Never would have guessed you and Isabel to get hitched. That's a page turner for sure."

"Nah, nothing like that," Farlan chuckled. "She's a good friend and a precious sister to Elke. That will never change."

"And what do you suppose you're going to do if the brat's actual father appears? We never found him you know."

Farlan let out a snort. "I'd tell the bastard he's not fit to be a parent. Though ultimately that would be her decision if that time ever comes-" The man's voice slightly drifted as he finished his words. It seemed to be a sore topic.

"So, Church huh? Seems it would be fitting on paper." Levi replied lazily. I continued to sleep and even added to my cover by letting a little dribble of drool seep to the table. I would go to extremes not to get caught.

"Though, Ackerman isn't bad either," Farlan said. By now I was completely lost in the conversation. Then again, that wasn't too uncommon for me. Levi let the silence come over the table.

"That'll be the day. I'm not cut out for that lifestyle. Besides, the brat could never learn to spell it. Her first name is enough of a pain to teach. " Levi grumbled.

"Maybe that will change for you. I do hope you could promise me one favor though."

I heard Levi shuffle in his seat. "Depends. If its switching cleaning brands you can forget it." I felt Farlan grow slightly tense next to me.

"If something were to happen to either-"

Levi interrupted him, "I'm not discussing this."

"I need to know I can count on you Levi. I'm serious."

"Tch, making promises as if we were kids. Farlan this is-"

"Levi, you're my best friend. More like a brother most of the time. I need an honest answer. Before I take this on, before I sign up for this, it's important for me to know she has somewhere else to go. Someone she can turn to. That there is an open door called home waiting for her."

Levi was quiet.

"Don't make me beg."

"I would never." Levi took a deep breath, "As a loyal friend I will agree to it. If you're sure about this."

"I'm as positive as the day I decided to befriend you. Things seem to have worked out nicely." I could envision Farlan gleaming. He did so whenever Levi followed his plans.

"Just don't get yourself killed." Levi said before taking another soft sip of his drink. I cringed at the words.

Farlan lightly laughed. "Wasn't planning to. I would like to see her grow up. It would be satisfying to know I did some good in this world. That my life actually meant something in this harsh reality. It's nice, knowing someone needs you; it keeps your spirit alive even after a hard day's work."

I let out a pig-sounding snooze.

"They're also loud, messy, and needy. I think a yippy dog is less troublesome."

"They steal your heart though. Even if they are a little banged up, it just makes them all the more worth while. Sometimes faults are what make a person beautiful, more special to others. It's like finding that rock whose outside is subtle with a few awkward imperfections about it. But when you look closely you find that small chip and inside there is a captivating crown of crystals."

"You're comparing her to the earth's packed together remains?" Levi sounded less amused.

"Or perhaps finding that dingy leaf with a few tears and holes in it seems distasteful at first, but when you brew it, it's warmth and sensations are unimaginable. Seems more relatable for you."

"Tch, since when have you become an intellectual poet?"

"I figured the tea comparison would seal the deal." Farlan laughed.

"Don't soil the valuable quality of it. Tea and brats are as polar opposites as-" Levi paused at the sound of a new guest's appearance.

"Finally found your lazy asses. Christ, had to travel across the entire HQ to find you gutter rats sitting here devouring hard earned food. And what is that stupid kid doing here? She's not-"

"Cut the shit, what do you want?" Levi's tone deepened when he asked.

"You're such a smart ass for such a short man. Learn some respect when your Squad Leader addresses you. Tsk, can't believe I have you ingrates on my team." I heard the screech of the bench and a few shuffles of feet.

"You want to say that again?" Levi growled. I held in my nervous breathing as I tried to remain off the radar. Keep quiet, I told myself.

"Why you little-"

"Levi," Farlan hissed. "Squad Leader Flagon, what is it you wish to discuss with us, Sir?"

The third man let out a few mumbled curses. "There will be a meeting later tonight that will explain the route, positions, and any other shit you mindless idiots need to be aware of for the expedition." I heard the echo of footsteps, "Don't be late, otherwise I will refrain from sharing any information with any of you. And I won't be the least bit sorry when a Titan chomps your damn heads off. It will be one less problem on my hands."

Deny it, I mentally pleaded, say you're not going. Tell them, you promised you wouldn't leave. My heart dropped when I realized no objections to the expedition had been made. And by then the Squad Leader was well on his way. Why didn't they say anything?

Farlan didn't restrain from letting out a groan. I guess he too, found the situation slightly stressful. "Hey Levi."

"Hm?"

I felt my small body being lifted off the bench and into the comforting embrace of my tall caretaker. I couldn't help but snuggle deeper into him. I never remember being held before I met them. At first, it seemed so foreign to be allowed to love someone else, to feel safe next to another person, but the idea quickly grew on me.

Farlan gave me his tender kiss on my head. "Would you mind taking her back to our room? I'll run the messages for her today. She's too exhausted for the work. She can sleep in my bed." Farlan said as he carefully pulled my leather bag from around my shoulder. I felt the heavy weight disappear.

I heard Levi make his way over to us and then I was shuffled into another relaxing hug. It wasn't Levi's size, or lack of bulky space that made him comforting, but his strong quiet disposition that made me melt. Our leader was like a stray dog. He protected everyone, for we were his pack. As the alpha, he was rough and could snarl a mouthful of razor sharp fangs when unwelcomed outsiders interfered. But he also had a soft side. In the presence of his family, we were treated with care, for the fangs were never used to hurt, only aided in guidance. He was a wonderful leader.

My heart slightly tore at the thought of the expedition. He didn't lie to me, did he?

"You spoil her," Levi said with a hint of annoyance in his tone. Farlan brushed it off with another chuckle.

"Says the guy who cut her meal for her the other day. And who fanned her hot drink before she sipped it. Oh, and lets not forget your nightly bed time reads and-"

Levi clicked his tongue as he carried me out of the commons. "That doesn't mean shit." I laid my head against his shoulder. Maybe having a day off wouldn't be so bad.

It was a long walk back to the room, nothing at HQ was convenient, and it wasn't hard to figure out why all the soldiers were physically fit even on their days off. Just like before, I pretended to be asleep as the squeak of our door opened to the room. It was quietly shut and my carrier strolled across the wooden floor. Levi gently laid me down on the cool mattress, aside from the few mumbled complaints of how heavy I had become, and began to undo my laced boots. He was careful when he removed my jacket and he also managed to slip me under the covers while barely stirring me. I felt the sheets being drawn up to my chest.

"M-mister Levi?" I asked with slightly opened eyes. My guardian smoothed an edge of the cotton fabric and then paused.

"How long have you been awake?" He questioned.

"I-I just woke up." I lied. The man raised a slight brow before adjusting one last corner. Then he straightened his back ready to make his exit.

"Well you're off duty today. Take advantage of it and get some rest. You're a solider here like everyone else. So don't expect free passes in the future," was Levi's blunt response. My heart pounded when I saw him reach for the door handle. A light sweat began to cover my forehead. Sleep, was no relaxing matter.

"Sir!" I blurted out. Levi quickly turned his attention to my alarmed voice. I flushed with embarrassment after that impulsive shout. What was wrong with me? But I knew what was wrong. I looked down at the sheets. "C-could you stay?"

"You're a little old to be afraid of the dark. Besides, I left the window's curtains open. Go to sleep," Levi said. His fingers twisted the brass handle. No, I couldn't let him leave. I sprang from the bed and zoomed over to him. I wrapped my arms around his lower half and let out several cries.

"Mister Levi, please stay. D-don't leave me. I'm-I'm so scared; I'm scared of being alone. Please stay; please don't make me go to sleep. They'll-Amara will-" I whimpered into his clothes. Levi tensed under my clinging hands. I hardly ever acted that childish. Crying? Tears were for weaklings. But I sobbed anyway.

"This is getting ridiculous. It was just a bad dream. Look brat-" Levi tried to say but I pressed into him. I literally became a ball and chain. I heard him sigh and I knew I had won. "Alight, just until you fall asleep." Levi said as he led me back to the mattress. I crawled onto the soft fibers and made plenty of space for him. However, Levi began to pull up a chair. I instantly patted the bed.

"No." Levi remarked harshly. I stared up at him with my watery eye. Though I had spent my time with Isabel, she never laid next to me. Most of the days she crashed before the arm on the clock reached eight. And once she was out, not even a Titan's roar could wake her. It had been a difficult adjustment when we first came to the Survey Corps. I was accustomed to being near someone and the absences were almost chilling. The nights seemed never ending. I missed the security.

I pulled the covers further up towards my chin. "Ok."

Levi came to the edge of the bed, leaned over and proceeded to unbuckle the trinket that was fastened around my neck. My eye patch was removed as well. I thanked him, but he just stared at me for a moment. After a quiet silence he slipped off his jacket before he settled next to me. His narrow body rested on top of the covers, while he propped an arm behind his head. It was a rare sight, but Levi's eyes closed before mine.

"You better be asleep." He mumbled. Though it was meant to be a threat, I lightly grinned and nestled close to his side. I had missed him; I hoped that no dreams could haunt me. However, fear gradually began to tickle my nerves just like so many nights before. Amara, she was laughing at me. I shuttered closer to Levi.

A small whimper escaped my mouth.

An arm suddenly rested on my shoulder. "Tell me about it."

"Huh?" I asked through my congested nose.

"This dream, what happens in it?" Levi asked while his eyes were lightly closed under his wispy bangs. I cracked my lips to speak but nothing came out.

Should I tell him?

His fingers drummed delicately over my covered shoulder. Levi was quick to disapprove of any delayed responses. He was a man who was always clear with his thoughts or choices. Wasted time was unethical in his terms.

"Must not be that problematic then." Levi said with a bored tone. I anxiously chewed my lip, another unflattering habit I had that drove him insane. For some strange reason, I pulled myself up and laid my head on his ribcage. I listened to his steady heartbeat. I paid attention to his harmonious breaths. His scented aroma of fresh soap and cleaning alcohol fragrance filled my nose. His neatly pressed shirt crinkled under my grip. Part of me was afraid to mention the dream, for I feared it would come true. A pitiful tear sneaked its way down my cheek.

"A-are you scared of anything?" I asked in a whisper. Levi took a deep breath and stretched his torso a bit.

"My fears are different than others." He replied.

I swallowed, "How so?"

"Well, for one, I worry about not getting my morning tea. That can be a crises you know." I actually giggled through my tears at his remark. I twisted my body around and looked at him. My head still rested on his side while his arm continued to be draped over me. He looked so at ease, like a king to his throne or a captain on his ship. Nothing ever bothered him. He was forever in control as if the world seemed to evolve around him. Everything was organized and had a place. I couldn't imagine him any other way. He was Levi, our leader, our protector.

And I didn't want to think of another possibility, but the evil thoughts were relentless. The dreams and Amara's voice they wouldn't rest. I had a feeling. I had some inner demon filling my soul with doubts about the future. I hadn't realized the broken pipes from my eyes until Levi stirred underneath me.

He brought his cold hand to the top of my head. "I've never seen you so upset, brat." I sniffed a bit and wiped my eyes from the salty drops. I didn't want to seem weak; little did I realize it was too late for that. I glanced into his grey orbs.

My lips cracked open again. "I'm afraid." My guardian tilted his head as if he was confused. How could he not understand? Amara had the answers. What she showed me was the truth. The visions weren't childish as they tried to make me believe. I knew better.

Levi clicked his tongue. "Dreams are not real. They can't harm you. It's not a gun that can shoot a bullet or a blade that can make you bleed. And it sure as hell isn't a damn Titan that can eat your ass."

I half-heartedly agreed with a nod. "Y-yes Sir."

"I still want to hear about it."

"A-about the dream?" I asked. Levi stroked his hand down my hair. I felt him hit the sore area of my scalp, where a terrible unwanted memory lingered there. His finger drifted across the bumpy skin.

"I figure I better get to the bottom of this, otherwise Isabel is going to keep looking like shit for the rest of her life from the lack of sleep. But yes, I want you to tell me what's been scaring you. What's infected your overactive mind?" He seemed sincere, but my heart still pounded.

I then closed my eyes. "T-there's a cup," I began. "It's sitting on the edge of a table. I-it's g-green for some reason and-" My throat started to become raw.

"It's only a dream." Levi calmly replied. I swallowed before I continued.

"And its not alone," I said. "There's fruit, b-berries like the ones in the books laying on the table too. Also, there's an a-antler so white it-it's blinding. But there's some sticky black s-stuff coming out of the end w-where it was c-cut. It's too dark in the room to see anything, s-so I don't know what it is." I could feel the chill rising up my back.

"Is that all?" Levi asked. I shook my head and clung tighter to his shirt.

"N-no," I whispered as the tears returned. "Amara's l-laughing at me. S-she's starts to mix the drink, the berries are mashed a-and the antler turns to d–dust. Amara puts it in the c-cup then she tells me to t-taste it." By then my stomach was twisting into rope like knots. Even Levi's arm shook over my quivering body.

"Then?"

I squeeze my eyes tighter. "T-then I take a s-sip. A-and it's n-nasty at f-first but then it tastes good. It tastes s-sweet."

Levi continued to listen quietly.

My mouth grew more parched. "I keep drinking i-it. B-but suddenly the h-handle breaks and the c-cup falls to the f-floor. It's broken too. A-and that's when the screams happen. That's when the room fills with all these s-scary yells and c-cries-" I hadn't realized how distressed I was until Levi sat up and pulled me into his chest. I trembled and sobbed brutally into his once dry clean clothes. Now the dreams were haunting me during the day.

Levi tried to hush me, "You're alright-"

"I-I look down an-an there's b-blood. There's blood e-everywhere! It's up to my knees a-and I'm drowning. Amara's still l-laughing. I-I can't get out. A-and-and the screams continue. I can't move. All I c-can do is watch the b-bodies coming up from the r-red swamp. Th-their faces are e-eaten away-" I was shouting at this point with my hands digging into the sides of my head. The fearful memories were drilling into my brain. The horror, it was all too real.

"Hey, knock it off. You're ok. Brat, hey, brat look at me. You're ok. Everything is all right. " Levi tried to reassure me. His hands pulled mine from my ears. My face was streaked with tears and my eyes were painfully swollen.

I shook my head. "T-there's green c-capes with the wings on t-the back. They're all torn up and keep coming and floating by the-the faces. A-and the b-blood is-is still there. It's e-everywhere. " I cried as my chin tucked to my chest. Exhaustion and fright finally ate away at me.

I expected for Levi to laugh at me or at least roll his eyes at my immature fears. I prepared myself for him to shove me away and make for the nearest exit. I figured he would make an excuse to leave.

But he never did.

He gently held me and unexpectedly started to hum a low tune. I actually had to control my cries to hear him. Levi had never seemed like the type to know anything besides literature or combat maneuvers. I never expected a man of such few words to carry such diversity within him. It was mesmerizing. I leaned my head closer to his chest, the vibrations from the melody traveled from his core to his throat. I listened with little bouts of sobs to this unfamiliar comfort.

"For these peaceful times have made us blind." Levi lightly whispered the song's lyrics. His hand rubbed my aching back as he continued. "So you can't fly, if you never try. You told me so long ago-"

Slowly Levi leaned back down on the mattress while I rested near him. He would hum part of the music and then voice some of the words. Eventually my tears dried.

"Sing for reluctant heroes, oh give me your strength your lives are too short. Sing for reluctant heroes, I want to be brave like you-" Levi softly spoke. He pulled the cover back over me and let his song lull me nearly to sleep.

"Mister Levi-?" I asked barely awake. The solider next to me quietly paused his melody.

"Hm?"

"What does r-reluctant h-hero mean?" I could tell Levi had to ponder over this question. I figured he was trying to decide how to explain in basic terms. He pulled a strain of hair from my face.

"It's a person, an ordinary individual, who takes it upon themselves to save others. Regardless of the risks, the fear, or the doubt in their minds, they come when called to aid those who they care about. They are not selfish and tackle the most difficult tasks without question. Many of times they do not know they were the heroes. However, it doesn't matter. As long as the people they care about are safe, that was their only goal." Levi replied.

"That reminds me of someone." I say sleepily back.

"I can't imagine who would be considered a savior in your mind." Levi stated rather harshly. I wormed my way closer to him.

"But he doesn't know it. Maybe he will someday." I say with tiredness lingering in my horse voice. Levi still remained by my side, slightly stunned by my words. I wondered if he knew whom I was referring to.

I could only hope.

My body relaxed and my mind started to drift into a deep slumber.

* * *

"It was like a nightmare and it's painful for me, cause nobody wants to die too fast-" I paused and looked at her with a curious eye. I had hoped that the pass half hour of explanation would have some influence on her. I thought she would believe me.

I had just finished the last of the verse only to receive a skeptical look from Isana. She too thought my dreams were anything but worrisome. Though she and I had grown exceptionally close over the pass couple of weeks, since the picnic, I was reminded countless times how much older she actually was. Not only was she an amazon in my terms, but also she was exceptionally gifted like Hanji when it came to brain development.

She was writing a hypothesis on toilet paper from the Orphanage, while I was doing good to remember how to correctly lace up my boots.

"To be frank Elke, I don't see how this relates to the expedition coming up? So you had a nightmare a week ago about a shattering cup and then Shorty-"

I coughed a reminder, "Mister Levi." I had been trying to spare her future hatred from Levi. My friend had developed some of those horrible habits from Hanji. Isana then held in her urge to pout.

"Fine, then Mister Shorty sings you a bad lullaby and now you're wigging out? Come on Elke its just a bad sequence of events. Seriously, no worries." Isana said before she chowed into her fresh bread roll I had brought her for our daily lunch meet up. I broke off a piece of my own food and crushed it between my fingers. I carefully watched the remains sprinkle to the ground.

"I guess." I replied with a hint of depression. My friend must have noticed my short response.

"Oh Elke please don't worry. It'll be all right. Besides, from what I've heard from Hanji is he's a pretty talented solider. Small on the outside but a badass titan slaying machine all bundled on the inside. Who's ready to explode at the first sign of danger!" Isana made an eruption like gesture by throwing a section of her food into the air then catching it in her mouth. "The little man is like cannon fire." She said with bloated cheeks.

I glanced at the swarm of tiny ants that were feasting on crumbs of bread near my leg. A sickness stirred again within me. The dark cloud, what a nasty element it was that followed so closely. I sighed.

"Yea, he's a good fighter. Always has been. I don't think he's ever lost either."

"That's impressive. I figure that means you have something to live up to. He must have taught you all sorts of fascinating maneuvers! Like, like a 'spin out kick' or a 'chop'. Oh! Has he taught you how to knock someone out with their pressure points-? " Isana excitedly questioned. I turned my attention back to the ants. Then slightly shrugged.

"Mister Levi doesn't want me to fight. He won't allow it. Last time I did, it was a week's worth of punishment. It took days to convince him I wouldn't ever raise a fist again. I thought he was going to hate me forever." The grass was still as green as the weeks before. We sat under the same slumped over tree that held the base of the picnic. Everything was the same, except for the fact it was just she and I. A flock of birds flew from the cluster of leaves above.

Isana wiped the drool from her chin. Her honey eyes reflected her confusion. "I have to say, that's a bit strange, though ironic would be a better word. Didn't you tell me he was a thief or something from where you guys came from?" I tore off more bread for the hungry insects.

"Yeah, he did some bad things. But Farlan told me it was all right since it helped us get food and keep the house we were in. Times were hard, but it was fun too. You would have liked it. We ran around constantly because there was no bad weather." I smiled at the memory. "Everyone knew us. And everyone answered to Mister Levi because no one wanted to mess with him."

"So doesn't he realize that power is obtained through force? Why would he keep that from you? If you can fight, why shouldn't you be able to? That's belittling if you ask me," Isana replied. She bit off another chunk of her bread. I had to sit and think about her statement for a minute. What was Levi's problem? It never crossed my mind until Isana brought up the topic. Or maybe it had, maybe Amara had hinted to the same concept before she had died. Something regarding being kept on a leash?

I chewed my lip. "He doesn't want me to be bad, that's what he told me."

"That's crazy! Fighting is a skill; a talent shouldn't be hindered. He's probably just trying to keep you as young as possible. Caretakers don't like it when you grow up too fast. It scares them."

"Why?" I asked.

"I figure it has to do with control. You see, Elke, when caretakers can keep you mentally younger they have the power over you. You, a kid, can't possibly make the correct choices, you can't have your way, and there are rules, which you have to follow. You see? The adult always gets the final call. How many times have you actually been able to make a decision and everyone listen?"

"Um-"

"Exactly, never. Caretakers believe they're kings or queens. Their power is ever lasting as long as the kid stays small and feeble minded. Remains innocent and oblivious to the world around them. Get it?" My friend said then cocked her head towards me. Her ponytail blew in the slight breeze.

I raised a brow. "How do you know so many big words?"

"Books. Reading is the key to understanding the world. Literature makes you knowledgeable which makes you also powerful. Caretakers can't belittle you, or look down upon you, when you have the brains to fight back. It's a trick that works every time." Isana grinned. I frowned instead and proceeded to pull my knees to my chest to allow my chin to rest.

"Well, I don't have the time to read books about dreams. Besides, not like I can read it anyway." I mumbled in the heat of embarrassment.

"That's why fighting is your power! Listen Elke, if you want them to respect you, you have to demonstrate your strength. And for you, that's an attitude with fists. A good hit should do it." Isana replied with an absolute nod. I on the other hand, nearly fainted from her suggestion.

"H-hit Mister Levi? Are you mad, sick in the head?" I exclaimed in terror, "I would rather get eaten by a monster than face that punishment!"

Isana held up her shaking hands in defense. "Alright, alright, I see your point! I have to agree that guy is pretty scary sometimes. Maybe you could have someone else use scientific explanation to back up your dream? Perhaps-"

"Mister Levi hates Commander Hanji. He almost strangled her because she joked around once and handed him the wrong tea mix. He wouldn't look at her for the rest of the day. I doubt her words would help. "

"Hmm, maybe he could be persuaded by fake generated tears?"

"I cried real ones and as I said, he just put me to bed. Don't think it worked."

"Has any fears?"

I gave her the what-do –you-think expression with a half lid closed. "He battles building tall creatures, Isana. And kills spiders without screaming. He's too confident to be afraid." My friend brought a hand to her face.

"Wow, that is amazing. Doesn't even shiver?" She asked. I shook my head.

"Nope, well he does curse when the guts splatter. And-wait a second!" I shouted and lightly slapped Isana's shoulder. She over dramatically flinched. My brows further scrunched into dissatisfaction. "Stay focus! I came here for your help. We can talk bug guts later. I don't have much time. I have to stop them! They can't leave; they can't leave for that expedition. And you know why-"

Isana cleared her throat. "Elke-" She tried to say but I flew up my flustered hands.

"I know you think I'm crazy. I know you think it's pointless to try and stop this, but I have to! You don't understand-"

"Elke-" Isana tapped my shoulder. I was too lost in words to pay attention.

"Family sticks together like you told me. And that's what I'm going to do. I'm not going to give up. Not today, not tomorrow, not-"

"Elke!" My friend screeched into my ear then hit me on my head. I yelped. She had my focus. I rubbed my sore scalp and stared at her.

"Listening-" I replied quickly. Isana let out a sigh and pretended to crack her knuckles.

"Took long enough. Anyway, you may be surprised to know I don't think what you're doing is that insane. You have a chance here, Elke. You have an opportunity to show them how strong you really are. I personally, think its import to be equal to your caretakers. And this 'expedition objection' is the perfect situation to register for your ticket to power." Isana shook my shoulder.

"But I don't care about power. I just want them to trust me, to believe what I have to say. Power-"

Isana squeezed my shoulder tighter and peered into my eye. "Power is going to help you convince them. You're going to fight, Elke, and earn their respect." I glanced nervously around.

"B-but I'm not allowed to hit anyone. And I'm not punching Mister Levi you can forget that-" My friend rolled her eyes to the blue sky and quietly asked for heavenly forgiveness. Sometimes my immature mind tested her brilliant head.

"No silly, you're going to fight to get outside the Walls."

"I'm going to what!" I shouted with a mixture of panic. I was convinced Isana had completely lost her marbles. What on earth gave her that idea? How could she fathom a tiny, one-eyed solider with no 3DM Gear to survive a moment of the open land death trap…and I'm referring more to Levi. Isana patted me on the shoulder as if I was overacting.

"Breathe first then I'll explain."

I didn't blink.

Isana pulled the skin down from her eyes and then proceeded to find herself some aid. Eventually she found a nearby twig and returned to our seated area. I still was left in shock. My friend shot me a grin.

"Alright," She said and began to make small sketches into the dirt. "Here's how it's going to work. It's full proof. The chances of being caught are less than ten percent."

I gulped, "Uh-"

"Excellent! I'm glad my test subject is ready for the experimental risks." Isana cheerfully clapped her hands together. My stomach dropped.

"Risks?" I asked.

Isana pointed the stick at me. "Nothing in science can be done without taking chances. Remember that Elke. If this works, it'll surely make the books to be admired in history texts. Oh can you picture it, Elke?" Isana floated into her dreamy fantasies. "Young intelligent minds out wit the greatest soldiers of the Survey Corps! Ah, I can see the glory shining down on us already!"

I wasn't going to mention it, but I knew she and Hanji had this competitive rivalry to see who was superior in the scientific realm of things. Though I never would have guessed sneaking outside of the Walls would have fallen under that category.

"So-?" I pressed. It was a given that I was nervous but curiosity got the better of me. Like Dad always said, it was my down fall every time. Isana's eyes lit up like the night lanterns around HQ. I could see those golden orbs glazing with determination. Maybe this would work out.

"Right, so here's the plan." She took her stick and dug a small rectangle in the ground. The ants that were once by me had begun to scatter. She tapped the dirt's drawling before looking at me. "A message is going to be the key to success."

I wanted to interrupt her with a million questions but at the time I refrained from doing so. The clock was ticking. I only had so many hours left to put Isana's extraordinary plan into effect.

It was indeed ingenious, however I was going to have to live the rest of my life knowing that entire scheme was built off a tongue full of lies.

* * *

 **Well, hope readers liked their surprise!**

 **Wonder whose going behind the walls?**

 **Be prepaid for some action! (It's a tear jerker even for me!)**

 **Also, thank you everyone who has favorite and left a review! Can you believe a Levi x child story has that many hearts?! I can't! I never thought this story would go anywhere- you guys seriously rock!**

 **Special thanks to my editor: WhiteTigar! :D**

 **Another thanks to Echo for always helping out with ideas as well :D**


	16. Die Beere

**Alright, the chapter everyone has been waiting for is here!**

 **So, suggestions:**

 **1) Read the previous chapter**  
 **2) Watch or Read the OVA parts**  
 **3) Play favorite emotional song**

 **4) Enjoy!**

 **Note: Many of the scenes were taken from both anime and manga OVA versions. And most of it was specially designed for this fan fiction. So yes, many of things are stretched for this story.**

 ***Warning* There is some "graphic" content. However, it's pretty mild I did not get as detailed as I usually do**.

/

Der Rüpel

Chapter XII :Die Beere

/

You known the times when you feel as though you could puke and shit at the same time? Well, that was exactly my current situation.

My hands trembled as I held the reins to my horse. I will spare the details, since quite honestly, I'm not even positive how the situation occurred. As far as I could say, Isana had managed to execute her 'overly-brilliant-plan' faster than a driven ant at a picnic gathering. All I knew was once Levi and the others had left to get geared up for the expedition, Isana had me up and ready before Commander Erwin even mounted his horse.

I was stripped of my PJ's, a toothbrush was thrown in my mouth, and I was snuck out of HQ, with my friend leading the way, and to the inner part of town. Isana practically skipped through the streets while I was dragging my heavy legs. It was far too early for this. My leather boots scuffed each stone in the path and my vision was as good as a homeless drunk. I couldn't fathom where my crazy friend was taking me. We made so many turns and dives behind buildings (because Isana thought we were undercover spies) that I was sure I wasn't going to make it back for the expedition anyway.

And just as I was about to question the goofball, Hanji's twin, she swung open a shop door and crammed me through the entrance. It took a moment, but once my eyes adjusted I caught sight of anything but the expected.

If I recall correctly, those animals don't belong behind the counter.

Seeing an unhappy four-legged animal that wanted a bucket of oats instead of being greeted with my face was the surprise of the decade. Who allowed her to keep a horse in their store was beyond me. But I didn't ask and proceeded to follow through with the plan. Together the three of us left, with no regards to the damage that had been done to that candy store. Because horses have to "do their business" somewhere and lets just say, that store wasn't smelling too sweet afterwards.

I snapped out of my thoughts when I felt the black horse's grumpiness radiated off of her. It was obvious she was still irritated from her lack of a good sleep and breakfast.

I swallowed. "You're not the only one." I nervously whispered between her ears. The horse snorted and tossed its head. No words were going to sway her; she was clearly pissed. Normally, I would have been slightly taken back, except I had bigger matters to worry about.

I peaked up from my overly large green Scouting cape. Just ahead I could see Levi and the others. All of them ready to face the outer walls and the monsters that lurked outside. I gulped as my stomach dropped. The reality hit me rather hard. I too, was about to venture behind the safety of the Wall. The fear of seeing those horrible creatures started to nibble at the back of my head.

I truly wanted to leap off the saddle and go running back to the room. My fingers began to slowly lose their grip from the reins. It wouldn't be hard to leave, I told myself. I turned my head around and got a quick glance at brick building that held the reassurance I so desperately wanted. I wanted my pillow, my blanket, I wanted everything but where I was.

But then I twisted back around when I heard the battle cry from the front. There, was the Commander giving his pledge to his soldiers, reminding them what they were fighting for was worth the sacrifice. I bit my lip and tightened the reins. My horse lightly danced as she felt the energy boil within me. It was a strange sensation, one I would feel many of times after this, one of excitement and also the queasy gut of nerves ready to explode. It was all very confusing for a nine year old.

But I kept reminding myself; I was making this sacrifice to save my friends, my family.

I pulled my hood tighter over my face. I did my best to reach my feet as far down to my stirrups as possible. Even though I was tall for my age, that didn't equal the shortest notch on the straps. It was going to be a rough journey, since nothing properly fit. But I couldn't complain; I had to go unrecognized until we were a good distance away from the Wall. Otherwise the trio, as Isana mentioned, would just send someone else to "take me home" and then this entire procedure would end up pointless.

I made a few adjustments to my side bag, which held the most precious item, the message. I gave the leather a good pat and mentally thanked Isana for her gifted intelligence. I remember moments ago she gave me a bear hug, then handed me my supplies, before hoisting me onto the cranky mare. I was too stunned to say anything; I hadn't expected her idea to actually work.

But that was Isana for you; what ever crossed her mind could be executed perfectly the following day. A miracle worker is what she should have been called.

I watched as the Commander settled his horse towards the opening entrance. Never in my life did I have to pee as bad as that moment. My bladder screamed, as I grew more unsure about my choice. I could hear the turning of the gears. Then the gate's security was no longer in sight.

"This is it! Scouts move out!" Our leader shouted from the front. His grey horse reared at his words and seemed to start the crowd into a quick pace. I had no choice but to grab a handful of my horse's mane to help steady myself against the mare's ever-growing stride. Though I was a confident rider with Isabel, it was an entirely new scenario when I was left on my own.

I found myself squeezing my eyes shut for a good part of the way. My heart pounded rapidly as if I was the one running. I felt the wisps of bristle hair flying around my skin. The rumbling under my legs shook me roughly as my horse sped down the path and mindlessly followed the others. It took me a while before I regained some courage to crack my eye open enough to see the blades of grass being torn by my horse's hooves. The bumpy motion began to jar my stomach and I had no choice but sit up and take in the view.

And I couldn't believe the heavenly sight.

A vast sea of endless green met with a warm blue sky and a yellow dancing sun. Birds flocked towards the moving white clouds and the breeze felt like gentle kisses on my cheeks. Nothing felt real; it was as though I was living in a surreal dream.

"Oh wow," I mumbled to myself. My head turned in all directions to take in the world that flew by me. I saw blossoming flowers of all hues and wild animals scampering about. The fresh air welcomed us through the swaying trees in the distance. My mind began to reel back to my days spent underground.

Why did we ever stay down there that long?

Amara I wish you could see this, I said to myself. I left behind not only the necklace with her feather, but also the comfort of Levi's jacket. I normally never leave the room without it, I felt so lost. But Isana had made it clear it would be too risky to be seen without the proper uniform. So here I was, alone, without Amara's trinket close to heart or the shield Levi gave me.

Soon the hollowness crept in the depths of my guts.

"Hey, stay alert Cadet!" I heard a fellow solider yell in my direction. I shuttered and lowered my head to keep from being recognized. "Are you listening to me? Cadet!" Again, the man shouted. I held my breath. Were we even far enough from the walls?

I slightly peered around my horse's neck and noticed that I couldn't even see my friends. Where were they? A spasm of panic hit me. They didn't venture from the group, did they? They weren't lost, right?

No, surely that wasn't the case. I told myself to bottle the emotions and remain calm. Yes, I had to keep my head. I mentally, controlled my rapid heart and instructed myself to sing the tunes of Levi's song.

 _For these peaceful times have made us blind._

 _So you can't fly if you never try, you told me so long ago._

 _But you left the wall outside the gate and more than ever it's real-_

Just as I settled to a normal pace my attention was diverted to a new problem, one that I surely would never forget.

"Titans!"

"Their coming!"

"Titans, engage 3DM Gear! Scouts defend!"

Automatically, I raised my head and scanned the terrain to see an all too haunting sight. A towering tall beast, undressed, and with gaping mouth came robotically charging towards our group. His flaring arms and bug like eyes fixed his focus on the ants bellow, us. I heard the scattering of the other soldiers, the jolting sounds of the flares, and even the blasts from the cables.

The ruckus from the cargo wagons did little to drown the noise from the fast approaching monsters from behind. My stomach dropped as two more beasts crashed over the trees. My horse grew more excited as the group scattered into chaos. My hands quivered and ached as I held the reins in a near death grip. Even my horse couldn't manage to pull through my hold.

What do I do? In a mindless panic I kept asking myself the same stupid question. Though it was ridiculous to even think that far. I was completely out of answers. No gear and no control of my body, I was like a sitting duck just waiting to be killed by the approaching danger.

For the first time, I heard the horrific cries of soldiers stumbling about. I was a bundle of strung tight nerves and too disoriented to comprehend much else. I basically was a rag doll jumbling around on the back of galloping horse.

In a blur, several soldiers redirected their mounts to the monsters from behind. They ran full speed and allowed themselves to be carried into the air by their gear. Their pride flapped on their shoulders of their Scout's uniform. That crest represented more than just _Freedom._ It took courage and raw guts to be a Scout; it was something I wouldn't learn until I grew into my boots.

The rumbling of the ground escaladed as the soldier's managed to collect themselves and command control of the situation. The falling of the Titans was the equivalent to an earthquake followed by the explosion of debris. I thank who ever delivered the final blows to the horrendous beasts.

I was so lost in the moments of heart pounding action that I hadn't realized everyone else had completely halted their advancement. And it wasn't too much of a shock when I stuck out like a sore thumb.

Unexpectedly, my horse crashed into the edge of the circled group of comrades. My mare's chest collided with another horse's behind. And without warning I was propelled forward hard enough to be laying literally on top of the horse's narrow neck. I groaned in agony.

"What the hell? Watch where you're fucking riding you stupid-" The man paused in his angry rant. I looked slightly up, forgetting about my undercover work and gazed with half open lids at Squad Leader Flagon.

"Elke?" I froze when a familiar voice called my name. My eyes went wide when I patted my head and realized my hood was no longer doing its duty. I sunk deeper into the horse's mane.

Hanji approached from the ground. She starred at me in disbelief. It was never a good sign when the 'screwball' wasn't happy to see you. I knew this was a horrible idea.

"Elke w-what are you doing out here?" Hanji asked rather unsurely. I wanted to blame Isana, because that's what you do as a child, though I bit my tongue instead. Part of me knew I was just as equally guilty.

"Tsk, is it that stupid kid again? The hell are you doing out here? This is no place for a child to be loose running blindly around. This isn't a playground you dumb pipsqueak! Where's Commander Erwin? This is ridiculous!" Flagon roared from the back of his horse.

I was about to sit up and answer, however the moody mare had other ideas and decided to bend down to enjoy a mouthful of grass instead. I couldn't even catch a grip as I was thrown forward and ended sprawled on my back. My lips tugged into a frown when the soreness of my back and butt throbbed.

"Elke how on earth did you get past the Wall? How did you get that horse? How did you manage-?" Hanji questioned me rapidly.

I let out a heavy breath. "Isana," I said. Hanji blinked several times before joining me in a loud sigh. She was now aware of the dangers of having an intelligent assistant.

"There she is the little delinquent!" Flagon yelled as he approached with Erwin at his side. The broad leader strolled up to me with an emotionless face. Though I knew exactly what it read, irritation.

"Well, I had to see it for myself to believe it. Never in all my years as a solider have I ever heard of a mere child escaping on horseback into Titan territory. However, there seems to be a first for everything." Erwin said in a dull tone.

"I wasn't escaping." I replied quietly. My back was still plastered to the ground as the black horse nibbled around my head.

"Is that so?" Erwin asked.

I nodded.

The Commander rolled his shoulders. "If that's the case Miss Elke, then what was the purpose of coming out here? And why is it you found it necessary to hide your identity for such an extended length of time?"

"I-I came to-"I attempted to say but my tongue wasn't quick enough. Soon a crowd began to form around us. I was single handedly providing the Scouts free entertainment. The Commander starred at me for a long moment.

"Do you not realize the danger you could have caused my men? Other soldier's could have been injured or more killed with your reckless riding or concern for your safety. This situation could have gone from bad to worse in just seconds."

I hesitantly raised myself up on my elbows. "Well I can explain Sir. See I was-"

The Squad Leader, whose disgust hadn't seemed to cool from earlier, interrupted. "You're not seriously going to listen to this lying brainless infant are you?" Flagon's extended finger was pointed in my direction.

The Commander seemed unfazed by the soldier's ranting mouth. And to which only caused Flagon to grow more flustered by the second. His entire face swelled like a red tomato that I had seen at a market stand earlier that week.

"I bet those disrespectful gutter rats are behind this. Damn, it's probably some sort of distraction to get all of us blinded and then eaten by these Titans." Flagon sneered as he looked at me. I licked my dry lips as I looked to anyone for support. Even Hanji seemed reluctant to come to my aid today. Everyone else was mumbling words of concern.

What had I done?

"I-I can explain!" I reacted quickly to defend my reasoning. "Its nothing like that Sir! Farlan, Isabel and Mister Levi had nothing to do with this. I promise it is all my idea. I came outside the Wall because-"

Flagon stormed over towards me with his fists clenched at his sides. The anger radiated off of him and it was as if I could literally feel the intense heat. I grabbed a handful of grass, fearful of what he might do.

"Shut up you! You have no right to outwardly speak unless given permission you misbehaving pain in the ass. " The Squad Leader then turned on his heals to the crowd behind him. "I say we strap her butt on that horse and assume she makes it back. I'm not going to risk my safety for some stupid twit. Besides we are soldiers, Scouts, not some sort of fucking daycare."

"But I-" I tried to explain; however it ended up working as a disadvantage. Flagon became engulfed in a steam of rage and without warning spun around and yanked me from the ground. I barely had time to struggle as I was dragged rather painfully toward the black mare.

Flagon squeezed my arm. "Pick up your damn feet!" He yelled. I lightly tried to pull back.

"W-wait! No, please Sir I have to find them. I have to find my friends!" I cried. Flagon snorted at my response.

"Tsk, I don't give a damn. Now move!" He spat as he shuffled me farther from the group. The whispers rose quickly from the other comrades.

"Let her go Squad Leader. That is not your decision to make." Erwin calmly said. Flagon halted for a moment.

"It is too my decision, the fate of my squad, my men, rest on my shoulders. And this stupid punk isn't going to get us all killed because she wants her pathetic daddy to spoon-feed her. I'm sick of this crap." Flagon turned to face me. "Let's go!" He commanded forcefully.

I squirmed as his hands that grabbed my wrist. "No! No-no stop!" I was about to be placed on the saddle when a familiar voice stunned everyone.

"Put her down you piece of shit." The man threated.

My face lite up, "Mister Levi!" I watched as shorter solider emerged from the group followed by Farlan and Isabel. All them had a plastered expression of hate. Flagon practically shrugged off Levi and proceeded to lift me back onto the horse.

"Watch your tongue kid. I don't give a damn what you say, her ass is going back," Flagon said. My butt was slammed on the leather seat. I tried to worm away but the Squad Leader was quicker and held my hands tightly together. "Someone hand me a spare rope-"

"Don't you dare touch her!" Isabel shouted in a ballistic rage. Her face heated up instantly as she watched Flagon completely ignore her. I looked at her with worried eyes. Flagon's grip kept tightening the more I began to refuse to co-operate.

I let out a slight wince.

"Hey you stuck up jerk, I said let her go!" Isabel fumed.

"Quiet down you disrespectful runt. I'll deal with your termination papers later." Flagon sneered. My aching writs intensified, that solider was relentless. Suddenly I looked up to see my flaming red headed sister barreling towards us at full speed. She bawled her right fist up and before I could even blink she was throwing all her muscle straight at Flagon's back.

"Let her go!" Isabel roared. Then her knuckles crashed right into the Squad Leader's spine. A thunderous bang rang after she laid her hit. And all that followed was the astonished gasps from the other comrades. No one would dare disagree with their commanders let alone nail one.

I was even stunned.

"The hell-?" Flagon shouted in a volcano-like explosion. But Isabel wasn't stopping. She balled her hand up again and took the full opportunity to aim at his jaw. Flagon only allowed her to get in inches of his face before he slammed his arm to block her. It wasn't hard for him, once he unlocked himself from me, to flip Isabel off her feet.

She crashed hard to the ground.

"Isabel!" I screamed as I began to scramble off the snorting horse whose nerves were just as frazzled as mine. Flagon was quicker and caught my arm once more and held me still. The rope came into view and then the burning sensation coated my skin. I hissed as it kept being wrapped without hesitation.

I was about to beg for Isabel when a quick shadow flashed around and instantly Flagon was no longer standing himself. Levi flexed his hand while the leader groaned.

"Tch, next time you threaten someone make sure you have the skills to back it up. And I don't mean your words either." Levi darkly muttered. His eyes then glanced to me. I felt a wave of emotions swirl around my insides. I was excited to see him, but also I was completely aware of the 'talk' that was going to happen. I wasn't looking forward to that.

Flagon moaned. "Damn gutter rat. I swear I'm going to-" Levi didn't give him another second. He used all his energy to repeatedly kick the Squad Leader. He wasn't going to stop, not even the countless instructions from Hanji or Erwin were enough to sway him. Flagon had messed with the pack's alpha now he was paying with the fangs.

"Levi that's enough!" Farlan exclaimed. However, Levi still didn't stop. Each bashing hit only caused Flagon's ribs to scream more and his face to swell. I had seen many fights and I always knew how they ended. I squeezed my way out of the ropes and slid off the saddle in one fluid motion.

The horse trotted off and left me an opening to get to my guardian quickly. I darted towards him and reactively shoved all my weight into his side. It wasn't a powerful effect but enough to gain his attention.

I pressed my hands into him. "Stop it Mister Levi! It's ok, please stop! I desperately pleaded. I added a little more pressure and my caretaker allowed me to move him aside and away from the wounded man under his boot.

I panted a few puffs of relief and everyone else seemed to have the same mentality. Everyone expect Levi; he was the only one deadly quiet.

Again, I felt myself being yanked from the spot where I was standing. My cape was being pulled forcefully by Levi. I knew I had dug the grave the moment I passed the Wall, now it was just a matter of how _deep_ the hole was going to be. The fabric slightly burnt my throat as Levi made his way through the crowd. I stumbled backwards and nearly fell, though I was fully aware I was in no position to make a comment.

I watched Farlan help Isabel to her feet. Her hand rubbed her sore head. Flagon was receiving more care than a person who needed a double amputation. Both were in caring hands, while I was being treated like a rodent who crawled into unwanted territory. It was rough being a kid.

Eventually, we made our way towards a remote space where basically no one could hear me beg for mercy. Levi roughly twisted me around to face him. His eyes narrowed as he looked down upon me.

"I'm not even going to ask why," Levi started while his hand squeezed my shoulder. "Because quite honestly I don't give a shit about your excuse. You know damn well you have crossed the limits this time, brat."

I gulped. "B-but Mister Levi it's important! I swear I wouldn't have disobeyed if there weren't a reason for it! I double swear-!"

"Elke, be quiet. I _swear_ you are nothing but trouble. Tch, come all the way out here on this shitty mission only for it to be waste of time because some brat can't listen to instructions."

"You don't understand!" I shouted then shuffled my feet away from his grip. I stared deep into his perplexed eyes. "You're not the one listening! I've told you, I've told all of you, it's not safe out here! I asked you to stay but you didn't. You don't ever listen to me!" My clenched hands trembled at my side. For once, I was angry.

Levi gritted his teeth. "Enough with that crap! I'm sick of these childish fantasies. If I hear another word about them I'll-" I threw my hands up.

"You'll what?" I questioned in a challenging manner. "What, ground me? Send me to my room? Put soap in my mouth?" I looked around the vacant land to point out the obvious. Levi's eyes light up in flames.

"Alright, smart ass-" Levi growled. His hand grabbed my cape once more and dragged me to the nearest tree. Within seconds he had the cables launched and my feet were no longer touching the ground. My legs somewhat wobbled as I balanced on the tree's branch.

I looked at Levi who had taken several confident steps backwards.

"You, face the trunk." Levi snapped. I huffed in response. "Now," he commanded. I let out a deflated sigh as I made my way toward the base of the tree. I stuck out my pout face and decided to look anywhere but where I was suppose to.

I barely took another breath before a hand clamped the back of my head and practically slammed my face into the bark of the tree. I let out an irritated groan of both pain and annoyance. My bruised nose had to sniff the crummy dust of nature and I was sure an ant was about to crawl in it.

"Levi Sir-" I whined. My legs danced and stomped. This was worse than having that bitter slimy soap bar over my tongue.

"You'll learn your lessons the hard way I suppose. Talking back to me gets you a one-way ticket into a tree. See, classrooms can happen anywhere." Levi said. I could hear the pride lingering off his voice.

"Fine I've learned my lesson. Now can we go home, please?" I begged. I was about to turn around, except Levi's hand twisted my line of sight back to the tree.

"Tch, oh no no no." Levi rapidly clicked his tongue. "You still have some learning to do. Personally, I think it's a great place to practice your counting."

My eyes went wide. "Math in a tree?" I asked. Levi then patted my head as if I was flea-infested dog.

"Personally, I'm more of a fan of physical punishment, however math seems to give you a rougher beating. Count backwards from five hundred then I'll see if you've learned your lesson." Levi said before backing away. I heard the sound of fleeting cables.

"What!" I shouted with my head still touching the tree. My arms swung around my body. "That'll take forever! What if a monster comes?" Levi's emotionless tone returned.

"Then you better count fast." He replied from down bellow.

Long story short, I was still in trouble.

The more my caretakers talked the more it seemed the blames, punishments, and irritations were stacking higher against me. As I mentioned before, the monsters weren't the problem out here, it was dealing with the authoritative figures that would get you killed.

I eventually had to sit down in the itchy grass (yes, my standing on a dangerously high branch punishment ended…some parenting). The discussion about, 'what to do with me' had taken hours. I delayed the entire mission all by myself. I was somewhat proud and upset that I had to be the one to cause the trouble.

Around and around they talked and basically the topic ended on the same note. I couldn't be sent back alone and no one was volunteering to escort me home. Levi, Erwin, and Flagon all seemed to be the sharks in the fish tank and each was taking a chomp out of another. It was a pretty heated argument for a while. A lot of angry shouts, fists raised, swearing, you name it; it happened.

"Alright Scouts let' move out!" Erwin authorized at last. The group of soldiers robotically, adjusted their gear and then placed themselves into their saddles. The horse's seemed just as weary as everyone else.

I raised my head up. "Where is everyone going? Are we going home?" I asked. Farlan motioned for me to get up. I did as I was told and made my way over to my caretakers. Levi's blistering anger had disappeared, but his annoyed mood remained. Little did he know, I was still irritated with him.

Isabel approached with the three horses trailing behind her and Farlan turned toward my direction.

"No," He said. His hand grabbed the reins of his bay horse.

My brow arched. "What; why not? I'm here so we have to go back!" I exclaimed. Why wasn't this working? Farlan sighed as if he read my pea brain.

"It doesn't work like that Elke. You're a member of the Scouts, now. The importance was voted towards the mission and nothing else."

I was speechless. Isabel mounted her jittery gelding and gave him a good pat.

"Don't worry Elke," She said. "You're going to ride with us. It will be just like when we are at home." Her reassurance seemed pitiful in my mind. I glanced around before grabbing the reins to the black mare who still had her ears pinned at me and a handful of grass in her cheeks.

"Tch, oh no. That's my horse, you thief. " Levi snorted. The reins were snatched from my grasp. I blinked in confusion and proceeded to watch as he adjusted the girth of the saddle.

"Well, then who am I going to ride?" I asked. Farlan tiredly ruffled my hair.

"You're riding with-"

Levi interrupted. "Me. You're butt isn't going to be given the opportunity to get into any more trouble. I'm reasonable for you until we get home. Any complains and I will force you to ride backwards. Got it?"

"Yes, Sir." I mumbled. Levi positioned himself by the saddle with his arms ready.

"You waiting to take a shit? Come on brat, move it." Levi said obviously annoyed with my lack of awareness.

"No!" I sassed embarrassingly back. Levi always made my cheeks flare into pink hues whenever he made those bathroom statements. Why, he had a fixation about 'shit' I will never fully understand. All I know is it started when Isabel took too long one morning, doing her business, and it cost Levi some tea leaves. I guess that's what did it and now everyone has to be tortured by it.

"Well with the way your standing looks like you are about to." Levi mocked as he raised a brow. I looked away from him with crossed arms as I sulked closer.

"That's gross."

Levi hoisted me into the saddle and proceeded to climb aboard as well. "Tch, whatever." He said from behind. I scooted as far forward as I could to be sure to give Levi plenty of space. I didn't want him to complain with me aboard. But then a firm arm wrapped around my waist.

"You better hold onto the saddle, brat. Because if you fall off you'll be eating dirt and I'm not stopping." Levi said. I lightly smiled as I held onto the gear. Levi sure had a way with words. I felt the back of his chest, the powerful security behind me. I couldn't help but snuggle somewhat deeper into his hold.

Isabel wasted no time spurring her horse forward and towards the others. Farlan gave both Levi and I a quick nod before catching up as well. Our horse started into a light trot before breaking into a mild canter. The roughness from her bouncy gates aggravated my seat bone. I had never ridden so long before and I was convinced I had blisters running the full length of my legs.

Still, nothing compared to the growing worries that wormed inside of me. How could they have not decided to return home? My thoughts wouldn't rest. My emotions wouldn't die. I really did feel sick. I was wrapped with panic and feared the worst.

My guardians may shrug off my dreams, but I knew very well how important Amara's warnings were. She was like a hoot owl. And that was never something one could ignore. But still the mission continued to venture on.

We had been traveling for many miles. It felt more like days than hours. The scenery was beautiful, the fresh air felt nice, but I was bored out of my mind. At the time, I wasn't really sure what the soldiers and others were afraid of. Yes, the monsters were tall and ugly, but they were taken down instantly as though they were nothing except pesky bugs. We had hardly crossed any since we first left, it seemed as though they were more of an endangered species than an actual threat.

"Brat, sit up," Levi instructed. My attention snapped out my rambling thoughts. I groaned and did as I was told. I was getting crabby. I was tired, hungry and distraught that Isana's plan hadn't worked to its full ability. Maybe I should just be grateful that I was with them, I told myself.

"When are we going home?" I asked lazily.

"Do you ever stop whining? And not for a while, Erwin had already told us we would be pushing farther this time. Guess you picked the wrong day to play Scout, huh?" Levi said sarcastically. I sulked knowing he was still irritated over the entire situation. Why couldn't he let anything go?

"I told you, I'm not playing. I have a job to do." I replied. Levi of coarse couldn't resist clicking his tongue.

"There are far more monsters out here than under your bed."

I lightly hugged the arm he had around me. "Yeah, but I don't want them getting my friends." I said honestly. Levi held me still against the bouncy ride. Time seemed to pass even slower, as though the afternoon sun would never come full circle. It was scary. It was getting more difficult to tell exactly where that yellow ball was. The grey full clouds were rolling in. I could see their puffiness filled to the max, as if any moment they would burst into tears.

My curiosity suddenly sprang to my attention. "Where are the others? The Commander? Hanji? " I asked. I slightly sat forward. My eyes strained to see in the shady distance. "It's so dark, I can't see anything."

I figured that was the sky's cue to release its built up tears. Instantly, a downpour of rain came pelleting at us. I hissed as the droplets stung my cheeks. Levi and I quickly found ourselves throwing up our hoods. Though it was almost pointless, the material was rather thin and it didn't take long for the water to start seeping through.

The horse's continued to plow through the storm. I heard Isabel and Farlan keeping pace with us, but the other soldiers were far from being heard or seen. It was as though they completely disappeared.

"Levi-" I began to ask but was quickly hushed. My guardian steered his horse closer to our fiends. Both Isabel and Farlan had their eyes locked on us.

"Pull your horses up." Levi commanded.

All three of the snorting animals slammed on the brakes. Levi waited as the others circled closer in. The rain was making it impossible to hear.

"What is it?" Farlan asked. Isabel darted her eyes around the area.

"Is it a Titan?"

Levi sighed a heavy breath before his voice went stern. "No. This is our chance." He said.

I twisted my head around. "What do you mean?" Levi glanced from me to the others. His eyes did their best to hold their leadership gaze. I now realize, he knew the risks involved in his plan. But the alpha has obligations to his pack.

"Farlan, you're going to take Elke. I can't have the brat slowing me down." Levi said. I felt his arm begin to unravel from its secure hold. Quickly I looped my arm back around his.

"Mister Levi, no! No, you can't leave!" I begged with my pleading tone. My raven hair guardian held still, unsure of how to further manage the situation. Farlan brought his horse even closer.

"What are you saying, Levi?" He asked. Levi was quiet for a moment before making his snappy statement.

"I'm saying this is our chance. The only opportunity to get close to Erwin and make the deal happen. The rain will actually aid in coverage."

"The storm, really?" Isabel questioned. Levi nodded.

"Yeah, but I'm going alone. It will seem strange if all of us, especially the kid, are wondering too close. Suspicion will rise and this whole plan can blow up in smoke. All of this will be for nothing."

"But, Levi-bro-" Isabel chirped.

Farlan interrupted, "He's right. It's best this way." I felt my heart sink and my guts twist.

"No you can't! I told you, you can't leave! We have to stick together. Mister Levi, please-" I clawed my fingers into his sleeve. And looked at him with the most watered eyes I could muster. He wouldn't do this to me, to us, right?

"You have to let go." Levi instructed me. The rain continued to hit us hard as we stood in the open terrain. The wind howled and the sun barely peaked from the sky. It was damp and it was chilly. My stomach rumbled and my body ached. But nothing screamed in agony more than my heart.

"No. Don't do this. Please, I want to stay with you. Take me with you!" I said in a fit of desperation.

"Not this time." Levi replied calmly. I gripped his arm tighter.

"What if we don't meet back up? What if you get lost? Wh-what if those things come back? What-"

"What if for once you _just_ fucking trust me?"

My eyes then drifted from his harsh gaze. I was out of options. I was out of reasons. I was completely tongue tied as to how to contradict that spout of words. A pup couldn't spar with the Alpha; I wasn't ready for the teeth.

"Hey look at me," Levi said as he gently pulled my chin around to face him. The raindrops dripped from the rim of our hoods. "I'll come back."

"Then we'll all get to go home, right?" I asked.

"Tch, yes. But not if you don't move your ass." Levi said. He pulled my hood more snuggly over my head. I peeked up from under the fabric.

My guardian's shoulder's relaxed as he stared into my uncertain expression "You stay with the others. You better not leave their sight, brat."

I nodded. "Yes, Sir."

"Alright then," Levi said before helping me onto Farlan's saddle. It didn't take but a moment for all of us to round back up together and get the horses moving into their rhythmic run.

"I'm going, if anyone asks I've left to scout the area." Levi shouted over the storm. Why was I letting go?

Isabel smiled, "Go for it! Secure our citizenship, Levi-Bro. You can do it!"

"We'll be waiting for you." Farlan said with a confident smirk. Levi nodded and looked at me. It was a difficult moment. I saw his eyes staring through me and into my very questionable soul. I knew, he knew all too well that I didn't want him to speed off and be the leader he always owned up to be. For once, I wish he was a coward and would run with his tail tucked back to the Wall.

But that was a silly wish. It didn't belong as a daydream but on the list of impossible things. Since I knew in the very depths of my heart, Levi would never be that dog. So, I decided to face him as the Alpha he was.

"Good luck Sir! Come back soon, ok?" I too smiled. Levi's jaw slightly dropped. I had to have faith in him. "We trust you!" I shouted. My guardian gave me a firm nod before asking his mare for more speed. I watched as he made his way into the dense foggy air. Just as he was about to vanish, Levi turned around for one final look.

I raised myself taller and couldn't resist waving back to our leader.

"We'll be waiting!" I yelled again.

Isabel waved and shouted her encouraging words too. And it wasn't before long that the dense elements engulfed Levi's form.

"Don't forget about us." I whispered.

"He'll be fine," Farlan said. I leaned back against Farlan's chest and endured the endless travel ahead.

"Wake up, kiddo."

I slightly stretched my stiff muscles. My stomach growled horribly and my head was beginning to throb from the lack of sleep and rough riding. I shivered as my senses came to. The rain still had barely stopped.

"It's so cold." I tiredly replied. I wrapped my arms tightly to my stomach. I would squeeze out the hunger and conserve the heat.

"I know," Farlan said. He wrapped his arm around me. "Hang in there, the mission should be almost over."

"Jeez, I hope so. We have been stationed out here forever! " Isabel whined. Her leg was swung over the saddle's horn and had an impatient sway to it. I rubbed my eyes.

"How long have I been asleep?" I asked.

"Probably a half hour. How you slept in the rain is beyond me." Farlan chuckled.

"Is Mister Levi back?"

Isabel pulled her arms over her head. "Nah, he's still out there." I sulked knowing my raw butt was going to have to remain seated for a bit longer. It was also torturous knowing he was alone out there; and we were alone over here.

Suddenly, a ticklish whisper caught my ear. My intestines squirmed when my sight caught a dark figure in the distance. It was small, tiny; it way by no means a monster. It was twirling behind some distant bushes. It was so enchanting.

 _Amara?_

"I-I have to use the bathroom!" I blurted out. Farlan raised his brows and so did the rest of the soldiers around us. A hint of embarrassment formed on my cheeks. I couldn't tell them why; they would never allow me to leave. I had to see that figure. There was no explanation, no reason.

"Ok, well Isabel can-"

"No!" I cleared my throat, "I-I can go myself. Please."

Farlan hesitated but then nodded. "Alright, but make it quick. And don't go past those trees." My caretaker pointed to the landmark.

I barely mumbled a 'sure' before hoping off the saddle and trotting in the sloppy mud to meet that mystical thing. I couldn't put into words how I felt, but I could say it was somewhat like being pulled on a leash. I just couldn't turn away. I had to see, I had to know what this thing was. It was perplexing and alluring to my spirit.

I slid myself around the bark of a tree and was greeted a few feet away with a flickering dark figure. I tilted my head.

That shadow, I remembered that silhouette. It's dancing feet and commanding arms kept catching my attention repeatedly. My ears heard another chilling giggle. My eyes darted around the ground. Where did it go?

I let my feet carry me quite a distance beyond the first row of bushes. My mind wasn't aware of how far away I was moving. How, I was venturing so deep into the vast scenic fields, that I was soon just by myself. Alone.

I looked beyond my feet.

The air was still. The only noises, aside from the rain, were the heavy breathes from my lungs and that ticklish laugh that kept seeping into my head. The damp earth soaked my sense of smell. It burnt a little. My eyes scanned the horizon line of trees. It couldn't have gone far. I kept looking. I wouldn't lose sight of the objective. I fought to get pass the walls in order to do some good, to save them. I couldn't turn back. I narrowed my gaze. Thankfully the rain began to let up. The hum of bugs swarmed near me. However, I still couldn't see anything.

"Amara show me." I asked in a whisper.

I waited until the fog began to slow and part ever so slightly. It was as though a path was being built for me. My wish, my prayer, I believed was going to be answered. I would do anything to save them. My family who had always taken care of me, this was my chance to protect them too. Though I was confident with my decision, my nerves seemed to contradict it.

I took a deep breath; I was afraid I would back out if I didn't get my blood flowing. I could feel my calves sparking with tension. Even my shoulders began to grow heavy and stiff at the thought of taking another step. While the sun was shinning and the sky was clear everything seemed glorious. Now, the haunting creeps of the gloomy weather seemed to stir the fears within me. Then, just as I was about to surrender, my friend gave me another reminder. She sent the white stag.

Its large sculpted antlers peaked through the hazy smoke of air. I could see its dainty hooves, its arched neck gracefully posed and looking at me. Its large soft eyes awakened my spirit.

I heard a distance voice, "Elke! Kiddo, where are you?"

The stag let out a snort before spooking into the dense forest. It's silvery coat faded beyond the under bush. I heard both, Farlan and Isabel calling my name. I wanted to go back to them. Their worries were hitched in their throats. However, I knew I was all right. I shook off my childish worries and pushed forward.

The sky continued to lightly weep as I trotted along the soaked terrain. I felt my boots slightly sink into the mud with each step. The splash of water hit my lower torso. My clothes began to stick to me like another layer of skin. The heat from my body swelled underneath.

"Keep going," I instructed myself.

Eventually, I made it to the barricade of olive green colored bushes. My feet halted. The darkness lingered on the other side. It was terrifying. I could only see the hints of tree bark and some wet leaves that were canopied above. A snap of a twig jolted my racing heart. Then as expected, the stag's chalky horns motioned me further. I gulped before I headed towards him.

I crossed over unsteady ground and nearly twisted my ankle. I dodged mossy rocks and passed by fungus-infested trees. Birds would get startled and fly away. Honestly, I wasn't sure what I was searching for. I never seemed to know. But how could I derail from that dream? It meant something; otherwise Amara wouldn't have shown me. I had to trust her; she always had the answers.

After stumbling over a broken branch, I came to what looked to be a clearing. In the center was a cluster of another group of bushes. Except, these were rather massive in size. I stepped closer. The stag pawed the ground before vanishing. I would have continued to follow expect the peculiar setting had me perplexed. It seemed as though I had been here before. In the dream perhaps, I wondered to myself. My eyes studied the plant's appearance. Unlike the other vegetation, its leaves were light, almost like a florescent green with sharp tips. Its body was covered in glistening thumb size fruit and pearly wavy flowers. Bluish and red **berries** held tightly to the limbs, like little hearts on strings.

They were tranquil and divine.

The sweetness filled within me and I felt myself drawn to their multiple bundles of tart eyes. I reached my fingers out towards a handful of plump dark ones that were nestled deep into the bushes' limbs. I leaned further forward, reached deeper, then suddenly a piercing sting slithered down my skin. I clutched the berries just as I retracted my hand.

I hissed in agony as I realized I had obtained a long irritated scrap. From my wrist to my palm the red thin line seeped a trickle of blood. I opened my hand to find nothing but squished black fruit that leaked a violet colored stain over my cut. The sweetness now mixed with the pain and it all seemed bitter at the moment.

I heard Amara's chanting laugh.

Fighting the burn, I waved off the berries and tried to smear off the remains on my clothes. I was desperate to clot the wound but decided staining my uniform any more would result beyond a disapproving eye from Levi. I shuffled my saddlebag around and pulled out the package Isana had composed. I tore the sides open and retrieved a few sheets of paper. Most of the pile was blank besides a few scribbled ramblings about fake Titan speculations. Isana had done her homework well and decided it was best for me to have a few pages handy incase I was asked for proof.

Sadly, I was never questioned.

I flipped over the science talk and pulled the first inkless page. Or so I had believed. I shoved the rest of the package into my bag, fastened the button, and then starred at the sheet. My eye widen as I looked at the message.

There, in quick-gestured marks was the doodle of a pair of wings. Isana had their feathers sprawled outwards but had one side overlap the other, and the darker side shadowed behind the light. It looked exactly like the crest, our symbol to our home. The Survey Corps, that's right we are the _Wings of Freedom._

Thank you friend, I thought.

My smile soon faded when a thunderous noise hit my attention. The ground shook afterwards. Panicked, I slapped the page to my injury and fled under the cover of the bushes. The thorns pricked and clawed my skin as I crouched to the floor. The jumbling motions of the moving ground caused my heart to speed up. Surely it wasn't the horses. No that was too loud even for them. An unfamiliar roaring moan echoed throughout the thicket. I heard the sound of retreating birds and again another monstrous shake unearthed the ground. I held my breath as I watched the multiple legged insets scamper around near my hand. One was daring enough to crept across my flesh. The blood from my wound easily coated the paper's surface. I clutched my arm tighter. I figured I could squeeze away the nerves. My breathing was barely heard over the unrecognizable forest groans. Soon the drawn wings were no longer black. I held my breath and prayed for things to return to normal.

Time passed and I realized the shakes along with the foreign land's cries had ceased. I swallowed a daring amount of confidence. Maybe I had imagined it all? Though it had seemed so real.

I decided to roll the nerves off my shoulders. Besides, I had to get back to them. Farlan and Isabel would be worried. But I couldn't help feeling somewhat disappointed. I had tracked so far believing I would find the key to the mystery. Then I began to wonder if simply leaving had been the answer.

I scooted my stomach under the grabbing arms of the bush and pulled myself free. My arm flared from being dragged across the moist dirt, but it would have to wait. I figured the group could at least wrap it until we returned to base. Oh was I dreading that lecture. Between the stained clothes, cuts, and lies, I was sure my freedom days were over. It was all worth it though, I told myself.

I was about to rise to my feet when a wet- warm-heavy-slim spilled around my neck and cheek. It smelled repulsive. I used my uninjured arm to pull the goo towards my eyes. Fear electrified me. The paste was more than some woodland remains. Swimming around in that sloppy mess were partials of fingers, bones, and traces of crimson strings. I trembled once I felt the hot wave of air blown across my back.

How I dared to turn around, I will never know.

I starred into the eyes of an enormous disfigured naked man. Its mouth spilled its drooling saliva, while it panted feverously above me. _So this…this was a…_

Without warning, the beast reached out towards me. I didn't get a chance to flinch as its massive fingers pinched around my leg and strung me up blindingly fast. Even my bag slipped off my back as I was pulled into the air. I watched as the ground below became further and further from my reach. My organs shifted to my throat as I dangled helpless upside down. My arms flared around as the blood ran to my head. My skull nearly collided with several of the treetops as the monster raised me higher.

The sky let out an excessive shower that drained down my face and mixed with my terrified eyes. I could feel my ankle loosing its proper circulation as the creature held me towards its face. I saw its powerful jaws eventually open and a line of grimy teeth were angled under me. It's happy tongue swirled around its wet mouth. I was brought closer to its hungry taste buds.

I let out a bloodcurdling scream. "No-no! Help-help someone! Farlan-Isabel!" I heard my cries echo throughout the woods but it did little good. The monster's mouth drew closer. It's steamy breath filled my nose. My hands nearly touched its tongue. A shrilling panic fled up my spine.

"Mister Levi! Levi-!" I shouted desperately. The monster let out another gut wrenching moan. I closed my eyes afraid of the darkness that swirled around the back of its throat. That's when the sound of heroic cables came slicing through and before I knew it I was clutching onto the fabric of my rescuer.

"Mister L-levi?" I stuttered as we sped through the wind. Then I heard a grunt of annoyance.

"Fuck no! Do I look that short to you? Stupid kid-" The man huffed. I was stunned. I looked to my left and saw a non-too pleased squad leader.

I gasped, "F-Flagon Sir!" I couldn't believe it. The solider shot another cable and directed us towards to the floor of woods. He held me tightly as his feet stumbled onto the surface. My chin bounced against his broad shoulder when we landed. The cry of the Titan shook the trees. It's hungry roar and heavy feet soon followed. I couldn't stop trembling.

Flagon quickly pried me from his chest and steadied me on my weak feet. I tried to cling back to him but he shoved me away. He looked behind him then back at me. I saw the concern spread over both his eyes.

"Run you stupid kid! Tell the others; tell them what you saw. Tell them to prepare for battle!" Flagon yelled. I shook my head as the fear poisoned my muscles. I was too afraid. I was scared, tears spilled over my eyes. I couldn't move.

That's when a blistering whelp hit my cheek. I winced and stumbled back. The pain lingered as I tried to rub the ache away. Flagon raised his hand once more. Again, my legs retreated a few steps.

"Don't make me hit you again! Deliver the message, cadet." Flagon said. I starred at him while he turned his back to me. His cape flapped through the air even against the heavy droplets that fell from above. "Tell them about the Titans. Deliver news, you're the signal in this damn rain. That's an order solider!" The squad leader's tone pierced through me. He was serious. He was deliberate in his words. He viewed me as one of them, as a fellow comrade. I had a job to do. I was no different, for I too had the Wings of Freedom resting on my shoulders.

But the soldier's heart seemed far from my grasp.

My knees still shook. My feet remained planted where he had left me. Even as the Titan advanced with its dripping lips and wild eyes, I stood frozen. The only detected movement came from the quaking ground. Each step seemed more powerful than the last.

"I'll never leave a man behind. I've got this. Go, cadet!" The blonde shouted over the downpour. However, I was still in a trance.

The sound of the fleeting cables eventually hit my ears first. Then the noise of Squad leader's aggressive cries shot an alarm through me, just like daggers. It was too late by the time I realized the dire situation. It all seemed surreal, but it was the only traumatic-unbelievable realization that got my adrenaline finally pumping. The sight of watching a commanding officer die in battle was the nightmare come true. I watched his body being consumed. His blades fell to the ground as the crimson fluid exploded from the monster's hand. And soon Flagon was devoured bit by bit. The only remains were his freshly exposed blood that was washed by the rain once it hit near my feet. The bugs didn't seem to mind.

I nearly choked as the wide mouth creature cocked its fixed eyes on me. It's meal still hung around its disgusting teeth. It's hand twitched in anticipation, ready for more. It was then, in that moment, I decided to unlock my legs. I had to move, regardless of the fear.

For I knew if I stayed, I would perish all the same.

With fear fueling me, I bolted back down the path I came. I let the plant's scratchy limbs in the dust and was able to jump over countless obstacles. If I tripped, I crawled back into my running position. I didn't stop, not for anything. Aside from my racing heart, I didn't feel anything else. The mind is an amazing thing. It has the power to multitask when needed and it also has the incredible ability to cancel out unnecessary thoughts. Even being chased, I don't recall any emotion. All I knew was each step I took was only going to get faster. There was no pain in my chest or my legs. I ignored the monster and I forgot about dying for those split moments.

The brutal rainstorm didn't hinder me either.

I had been running so blindly for what seemed like forever that I nearly sped fast everyone. I hadn't realized I had made it back onto the flat open land. Suddenly, a pair of firm arms caught me. I reactively squirmed in their hold, my adrenaline too elevated to settle.

"Elke! My god where have you been? Elke what's on your shirt? What-?" Farlan tried to ask me but I erupted into ballistic words of distress. I couldn't keep the sobbing hysteria under control.

"C-commander h-he, the c-command he's-" I cried. "Th-they coming! Coming, the-the monsters, he told me. The com-commander told me to s-send the m-message. I-I didn't want to l-leave but-I'm so s-sorry-" I wept hopelessly. Farlan gripped my shoulders and then ran a hand down the side of my face.

"Hey, hey kiddo calm down. Breathe, that's right." Farlan instructed me. Isabel was at our side at once. She looked at me with questionable eyes.

"Why'd you run off? And what's all the fuss about, Elke?" She asked in her hyped voice. I shook relentlessly. I wasn't sure I could talk anymore.

I panted heavily, "T-they're coming! We've got to go. I wanna go back!" They most likely couldn't see the amount of tears that spilled from my eyes. And it was an absolute they couldn't tell the sheer terror that was funneling through me. Since, they and the other soldiers as well just stood there looking at. They starred at me as if I was crazy or delusional!

"Elke, we can't just leave-"

I instantly grabbed Farlan's hand and began tugging him in the direction of home. "We have to go! Let's go! We can't s-stay here. P-please we have to go back. They're coming!"

"Elke we can't abandoned our post!" Isabel shouted furiously at me. I looked at her as I whimpered.

"I wanna go home! Take me home." I stomped and pleaded with Farlan. He glanced at me with his quiet blue orbs. How could he look at me like that? Couldn't he see? Couldn't he tell, how upset I was? I didn't believe, at the time, a full explanation was needed. They should have just trusted me.

"What's gotten into you? Besides we can't leave just yet kiddo. Levi's still out scouting remember?" Farlan said. He wrapped his hand around mine. The rain seemed to pour harder; it was actually started to hurt. Against the elements I darted my head around, blindly searching. That's right, how could I have forgotten about Levi? My heart pounded heavily. The endless worries bubbled in the pit of my stomach. He was out there alone.

"Where is he? We have to find him." I said and pulled Farlan around. It was growing impossible to see. The stench of steamy earth clawed at my noise. My damp hair clung to my chilled skin. I was frozen down to my bones.

"Mister Levi! Levi where are you?" I called out to the vast open land. A lone solider stormed over. His face was a blistery red against the ghostly sky. His boots splashed into the muddy puddles.

"Shut up! Do you want every Titan here to-"

Farlan defended me, "She's just a kid." The solider snorted at his response then shot an accusing finger at me.

"I'm not going to be an open buffet for some wondering giant because you can't keep that brat quiet! Now shut her up!" The unformed man spouted back. I watched Farlan's shoulders drop. He must have realized the severity of my vocal lungs. I on the other had refused to co-operate.

"Elke, stop. Stop it. Elke-" I barely heard Farlan. I was lost in my own fears. Unconsciously I squeezed my guardian's hand tighter as the panic ballooned in my chest. I frantically looked around. Amara's insane laugher scratched at my head.

"Mister Levi! Where is he? Levi, Sir! Where are you?" I screamed over the storm. I would find him; I had to. Unexpectedly, I felt a firm hand grab me. I was instantly spun towards Farlan whose concerned face had me startled. He was starring at the raw wound that was cut into my palm and the each of our blood shared hands.

Isabel too seemed rather spooked.

That's when I realized; I was still holding the crinkled page of Isana's drawing. The bloody inked sketch of the Wings of Freedom. Amara's laugh then melted my expression. I was speechless.

"Elke where did you go-?" Isabel began to question but was interrupted by the heart stopping rumbles of the ground. The sounds of birds fleeing caught my attention. Then an eerie fog carried an uncomfortable sensation with it. A familiar groan filled the air.

"What was that?" Another solider near us asked. The horses began to grow restless. Their snorts and stamping hooves paled in comparison to the growing thunderous earthquake like roars. That's when my memory flashed me the scenes of our Captain and the monster that devoured him. The message, how could I have forgotten?

"F-Farlan I-" I stammered too late. A screeching ungodly cry tore through the atmosphere. The horses reared in response and I could see the line of trees, from my path, being trampled. Then a pair of enormous eyes and a drooling wide spread mouth shot into view.

"Titans!" The group of soldiers hollered. Their blades instantly were drawn from there sheathes. Many tried to wrangle their mounts in order to prepare to engage. However, their tread of their boots were making it difficult to get a grip in their stirrups. The ground continued to shake. I wanted to scream, run, but my petrified emotions prevented anything. And there it was, the blood hungry monster, running towards us. Its stomach wasn't satisfied from the first meal.

Suddenly, I was lifted from the ground and hugged tightly to Farlan's chest. His racing heart met mine. I had never been more terrified, more insecure than this moment. I clutched onto his jacket. The blood from my injured hand soaked into the fabric. With tears I melted into him.

Why did I do this?

Why did I leave home?

"I want to go home! Farlan," I cried. "I'm scared. I-I want to go b-back." I felt him hug me closer to his body. His frantic breathes rushed into my ear. I could feel him spinning around, apparently looking for our friend. Then the sound of determined will echoed close.

"Isabel!" Farlan yelled. I glanced from beyond his shoulder to see the girl in pigtails steadying her grey gelding before climbing aboard. Her blades were ready, her mind set for battle. My insides twisted. Where was she going?

"No, Isabel! Come back!" I screamed. Though I'm not sure I could be heard more than any of the other poor souls that were desperately trying to avoid a dreaded fate. Their 3DM gear was basically useless against the flat plains. I watched them struggle in the slippery mess, I saw them fumble with their gear, and I realized their fears were no lesser than mine. All of this only terrified me more. Adults shouldn't be afraid. They're never scared. Levi never was.

Farlan ran towards the grey frisky horse and managed to grasp the reins before it could bolt. Isabel fought restlessly.

"Let go! I'm going to kill it! Farlan-" Isabel fired back. The other solider stood his ground. His voice filled disgust.

"Isabel, this is no time for you to be the hero and charge into a lost cause. Besides, we don't just have ourselves to protect!"

"If we don't do something, we are all going to be killed! Fleeing is not the answer-"

Farlan jerked the reins harder. "This is not about everyone! We're here for us. Elke, needs us, they are an after thought!"

I sobbed as I witness the scene unfolding before me. The horror of seeing, yet again, humans being devoured like crumbs of bread was any person's worse nightmare. Except, I was living it. My eyes were watching the Scouts, some strangers and others familiar friends tangle with the beast. Its enormous hands grabbed handfuls and seemed to be delighted by there pleads for rescue. My hopes of victory were slowly diminishing.

"Isabel, I need you to carry Elke out of here." Farlan said. The screams of the soldiers continued to rise. Isabel gritted her teeth.

"No! I'm not turning my back on them. We're Scouts, soldiers, we owe it to everyone to stand and fight. We're not cowards!" Isabel yelled back.

"You're the fastest rider, damn it! There's no time." Farlan shouted back. Their arguing was quickly drowned in the hysterical wails of falling men. The monstrous roars kept erupting out of the foggy clouds like knives to paper. My heart pounded harder the more I realized their was more than one.

"Farlan!" I yelled as another demon from the mist emerged. And from its jagged teeth hung a mangled corpse. Blood was squeezed from the women's intestines as the creature chomped harder. Her once pearly eyes now dull. My stomach instantly dropped as I watched colorful organs ooze from its mouth.

Eventually the monster's searching eyes soon locked on us.

I tried to grab Farlan's jacket but instantly I was swung from his protective chest and hoisted into the rough saddle. The Isabel's horse pawed the ground repeatedly, for he too saw the approaching danger. My eyes blurred with tears and I reactivity jumped back into my guardian's arms. Farlan scrambled to catch me.

"Elke! Elke stop it. You've got to go. You have to leave now-!" The blonde solider tried to use his threatening voice to slap sense into me. Except, I was far beyond hope. I dug deeper into his firm grasp and linked my shaking limbs around his neck. I created a chain; now he couldn't make me move.

I cried. "No! No don't leave me. Please, please don't leave. Farlan I'm so scared. Please I just want to go home. Take me home!" I clawed my fingers into his soaked clothes. The blinding rain was relentless. Each droplet was a bullet to my cheeks. I felt Farlan prying me from his hold.

"Elke, you have to trust me. Kiddo it's the only choice right now. You have to go." Farlan said. Then in a split moment he pulled my face close to his. I trembled as the roars from the Titans continued and the men's screams were fading.

Farlan's hand rested on the side of my cold face. "I-I'm afraid." I nervously whispered. My guardian's eyes reflected my sorrow.

"I know kiddo," he quietly said as if we were in our bedroom again. And strangely I could hear every word as though the chaos around us, for a moment, had vanished. "I'm not leaving you. Don't be scared. Isabel is going to take you home. You remember our room right? You remember all your things there, your books, toys, and your bed?"

I swallowed a raw lump as I nodded.

"Good, because I want you to keep picturing that room since that's where your going to be. Soon you're going to be under the covers and Levi's going to read you your favorite books a-and-" Farlan began to choke. "and your going to be fine. You're going to be safe, Elke. I promise you, I promise you will make it to your bed tonight." My guardian's boots sunk lower in the mud as he moved closer to the horse. I bit my lip as I tried to keep from crying.

"P-promise?" I asked. Farlan leaned his head against mine. I felt his warmth in the chilling dampness. A tear leaked down my cheek.

"I'll double swear to it." He whispered back. I didn't even get to muster a response as I was once again thrown upward. My hands clung to the saddle. I felt Isabel from behind. Her panting chest, her adrenaline was flowing into me. I hesitantly peered down to see Farlan whose blue orbs didn't seem so reassuring.

"Isabel, find Levi and take Elke home." A Titan's scream then erupted through the air. Farlan jerked his attention back to us. His face expressed his greatest fears. _We were out numbered._ "Now!" Faraln commanded before giving the gelding a good slap. I held my hand out, but only the wind caught it.

Isabel rode from behind. Her arms hung beside me as she directed her mount around the broken gear and scattered bodies, except none of them were exactly still in tacked. I squeezed my eyes shut. I couldn't watch. Though I blinded myself from my reality, I still could sense everything, the vibrations from the horse's hooves, the stomping of the monsters, the cries from the men around us. Everything seemed amplified, even the blistering rain become more difficult to ignore.

I gripped the saddle's leather. Tears poured down my cheeks. All the while, I could only think about the swirling thoughts that engulfed my head.

Why?

Why did I leave home?

I couldn't stomach any of this.

"Woah!" Isabel suddenly screamed against my ear. I felt her arms tug on the reins. Though the horse's mind couldn't connect with his fast moving legs in time.

I barely had a second to register much more, when a powerful explosion burst in front of us. The screech of a Titan echoed afterward. My face heated up from the mass of debris and high wind that came spiraling. I couldn't even catch my breath. Without any hesitation the horse underneath us stood up on his haunches so quickly our balance was instantly launched backwards. I heard the gelding's desperate whinny as his weight took us down.

I crashed into Isabel's chest as we tumbled to the muddy ground. The nasty taste of damp earth coated my tongue. Then an unexpected weight came forcefully down upon my lower legs. I let out a muffled whine, as I was somewhat still in a daze from the fall. The pain radiated but I couldn't seem to pinpoint a source.

Then a demonic yell screeched through the crying clouds. All I could do was shield my head from any other impacts. I shook over the disgusting soggy grass and prayed the nightmare would end. I wish I could say it was all a dream.

The helpless nickers from the horse barely caught my attention. A quick tussle from his flaring legs and the gelding was on his wobbly knees. My cloak instantly wrapped tighter around my lower throat and I found myself struggling for air. My hands clamped the fabric as I desperately tried to yank myself free. I wasn't entirely sure what was happening until I felt myself being dragged along the sloppy terrain. The grimy floor splashed endless amounts of remains along my body as well as my face.

The horse's frantic mind caused him to bolt from the accident. I could hear his desperate snorts of fear channeling from his lungs. And with each stride, he was choking me harder. My vision was fading. All I could hardly make out were the countless amounts of mangled corpses that we flew pass. The blood, I could see the red sea now.

Amara couldn't stop laughing.

"Elke!" I heard a charging voice call. I wanted to respond; I wanted to call for help. But my throat, it was closing. My body was taking too much of a beating from the horse's back feet. Every kick sent an agonizing blow to my bones. I felt exactly like a punching bag. All I could do was wince. And I just pleaded to someone, anyone that the pain would end.

It seemed like an eternity before my wish was granted. A shearing slice rang from my ear before my throat swelled with air. My battered body slid to a stop. And all I could do was lay there as my eyes danced with different colors. My head pounded and I felt as though I would never be able to move. All my joints felt as stiff and heavy as led. I was exhausted.

I just wanted to go home.

Take me home, I thought to myself.

"Elke! Elke, oh god, are you alright?" Isabel asked frantically. She was knelt at my side. Her blade was drawn and grasped in her hand while her other felt around my dirtied face. She too was covered in earth's wet substance.

I cracked my eyes open slightly larger. "I-Isabel?" Another Titan's vocals soared over the tee tops, while a soldier's pleads sounded helpless. I saw my sister's face twist into a mask of pure hate. The flames in her eyes were sparking the more she kept witnessing her comrades falling to their deaths.

"Bastards! I'm going to kill them! " Isabel shouted out on to the battle field. I gasped for more air as my chest twitched for relief. I starred at the girl next to me. Her gaze, her aggression was still locked on the scene behind us.

"Isabel we need to g-go h-home." I stuttered from my sore lips. The roars of the monsters kept coming in waves. I was feeling the affects from having my breathing cut off; my head was spinning too much to comprehend what Isabel was about to do. It was a blur of movements.

But then I saw those waving pigtails flying at the creature's mouth.

Her fierce scream echoed over the storm as all her strength went spiraling through the rain. She clenched her swords tightly and swung with all her might at the monster's approaching hand. I held my breath as she sliced off his digits and made a quick swing to the right. But that wasn't enough to escape the creature's fixation. I was too late to shout the words. I wasn't brave enough to save my friend.

Instead, I just sat there in shock as the Titan latched onto her frame and proceeded to devour her. Just like Flagon, I witnessed another bloody scene and heard the horrors of cries from my guardian, my sister.

I nearly died when I heard her calling for help and more specifically for her _brother,_ Levi. I trembled as I saw her head tumble down from the drooling mouth and roll across the ground. There, she laid frozen in a trance just like Amara. Her severed neck, the bloody drips, was the only thing still moving.

The monster swallowed the remains.

Finally I found my lungs. Then I let out the worst ballistic cry my throat had ever mustered. I scrambled myself backwards across the soaking red terrain. I couldn't find my legs; I couldn't find it in myself to stand. I was a bug on the wall against a thick book. I was going to die.

"F-Farlan! Farlan!" I repeatedly hollered. My hands gripped the soggy grass and I could feel the mud squishing under my nails. Though the rain blurred the Titan's advancing jiggling body, I still knew how close it was coming.

I scooted back once more. "F-Farlan!"

Suddenly, a pair of arms gripped me in their hold. I was swung close to a soldier's chest and my hands clutched around the back of their neck. I recognized the frantic voice.

"I've got ya kiddo!" Farlan said as he carried me in a full out sprint away from the dangerous creature. I dug my face into the crook of his neck and squeezed myself as close as I could to him. I was so thankful, so relieved to have been saved.

And just as he had started running he stopped.

"The hell is everyone-?" Farlan asked in between bits of pants. I could feel him spinning around looking at the mess that lay before him. I already saw the disaster and kept my eyes shut tight.

"No one made it-" Farlan whispered in a devastated voice. I hugged him tighter as I tried to forget the horrible image of my sister. "Fucking bastards. Even, dammit even the horses ran off."

Tears poured down my cheeks.

"F-Farlan I want to go h-home."

"Shhh," Faraln was quick to quiet my words.

I peered from over the fabric of his shoulder and into the dense fog. The lingering growls of the monsters still lurked close. The pounding of their humongous feet shook the ground. Each step only caused our hearts to quiver more brutally.

A ghastly groan emerged from the air.

Farlan twisted in all directions. It was hopeless; the dense air was reluctant to give. It's cloudy mist fumed around us and danced with the devils that hid in the depths of the shadows. My guardian's breaths grew heavier. I was sure the tension in his body was going to make him snap in two. Everything kept spiraling out of control.

"Elke," Farlan mumbled into my ear. His hand stroked the back on my head. Each finger shook through my hair. He swallowed roughly, "kiddo I need you to listen to me. Please, please just this once. Can you do that?"

I hesitated but nodded slowly.

"Good, alright. I'm going to put you in a safe place, ok? You are not to leave it, not for anything, do you understand? Do you understand, Elke? I need you to remain put."

"No, no Farlan please! Please, please s-stay. Don't go! I don't want to lose you too!" I begged into his drenched clothes. Another threat moaned nearby. They were right on our heels. They could smell the fear.

"Kiddo, I promised you at the start of this that you would make it back to your bed tonight. You hear me? You're going to be fine. Levi's going to come back for you, I promise you that. But right now, I need for you to be strong for me. Can you be brave for me Elke?" Fralan asked as he hugged me closer. I trembled but gave him another nod.

"That's my girl."

Farlan pulled me back and brushed the wet bangs from my swollen red eyes. In spite of the situation he managed a slight grin. I stared at his blue eyes and he looked into mine. Only Farlan could see past the eye patch. His hand ran down the rounds of my cheeks and traced my chin. He was trying not to show the pain that was brewing inside of him.

The rain continued to pour.

"I love you," Farlan spoke in a hush like tone before kissing me on my forehead. He did several more times. He held me firmly in his arms and made me forget about everything. My heart fluttered at the sounds of his words. No one ever had cared for me so much. I had never admired anyone more. "I love you so much, Elke." He said again.

I wasn't sure if I should say it but I did anyway.

"I l-love y-you too." I whispered back. Farlan gave me a heartfelt nod and kissed the top of my head once more. He was having as hard of a time letting go as I was. I heard him clear his throat.

"Ok," Farlan said and carried me toward a more shady area. The coolness wiped around us. I still clung to him. How could I let him go?

My guardian got to his knees, "It's going to be alright." I still shook as he began to lower me to the damp ground. I happened to peer down and nearly gaged as I realized my lower half was now sitting in a pile of dismembered soldiers and the remains of their staining blood.

"F-Farlan no please-" I began to whimper but he quickly cupped my face. His thumbs rolled over my skin in such a soothing manner.

"You have to trust me, kiddo. I'm going to get you home like I promised. I swear you're going to be fine. You must have faith in me. Please, Elke trust me." Farlan pleaded. I closed my watery eyes. Then I felt warm fingers smearing a mix of substances around my face and neck. My tears flowed like a broken pipe. I couldn't stop and the smell of the rotten corpses only added to the stirring emotions within me. Another roar broke the silence between us.

"Shhh, no crying. Please Elke, you have to calm down. You're alright. You're alright, kiddo. Shhh," Farlan chanted his reminders to me as many of times as he could. I could hear his voice growing more hoarse.

"D-don't leave. Stay h-here. Farlan don't go-" I sobbed. My guardian finished plastering the mess on my face and looked at me with his worrisome eyes.

"It's my job to protect you. I made a promise to you and I intend to keep it. Now, lay down on your stomach. Shhhh," Farlan said. I choked back a few hiccups before I let him position me how he wanted. The soupy blood and mud filled around my stomach, past my clothes and to my bare flesh. I wanted to squeal or squirm away but Farlan held my back down gently.

"A-are you going to lay down too?" I asked. Farlan looked over his shoulder. He too, heard the dreaded noise of another stalking monster. His eyes faced me once more.

"Y-yeah," He said. "But I need you to close your eyes first, because I need to see you resting. Yeah, you need some rest, kiddo. Can you do that for me? Can you close your eyes?"

I blinked in confusion, "S-sleep? Out here?"

"Yes, get some sleep. Pretend we're at home, under the covers and you are listening to your favorite story."

"The one that Mister Levi tells me?" I asked. Farlan nodded as he reached at the body parts around me.

"That's the one. Close your eyes, Elke. And remember, Shhh-"

I took a deep breath and let my lids settle over my eyes. The darkness clouded the aching sight. However, it wasn't peaceful. A sudden bundle of weight was loaded around my back and shoulders. I felt trapped and the filled with panic.

"F-Farlan!" I gasped. Instantly, he covered my mouth and lowered his head to my level.

"Shhh, you have to be quiet. Close your eyes. It's alright, I'm right here," Farlan reassured me by lopping his smallest fingers with mine. "I swear, you're going to be alright. Nothing is going to hurt you, baby girl."

"P-promise?" I choked.

Farlan swallowed a lump in his throat. "I-I double swear to it." His lips kissed my fingers gently. "No matter what, no crying, no screams, no movement. Keep your eyes closed. Ok?"

"Y-yes."

A Titan's hungry groan followed. Farlan didn't waste a moment. He gave me a final look before he pulled his hands away and then lowered my eyelids down. My hands felt the warmth fade. The coldness gripped them and I shook under the heap of the dead.

I heard a few cable springs and the cries of the monsters.

"Come at me you fucking bastards!"

Without thinking my eyes shot open at that voice. My heart tore in two when I saw my guardian struggling against the monster's hold. Not again. My guts knotted as his body was headed to the drooling mouth of the devil. I kept mumbling, 'no's' and 'please' as if that would save him. As if a miracle would happen.

Why?

Why did I think I could save them?

Farlan's eyes drifted down. His instinctive nature got the best of him. He couldn't vanish from this world without checking on the person he treasured so dearly. I was about to call to him but Farlan, as usual, was quicker. His single finger went to his lips and he shook his head.

I could hear him now, "Shhh." That is what he would say.

I cried into the ground. My hands flew over my head as the waves of nausea splashed in my stomach. I heard the crunches and the roars. The spill of blood rained from the sky and dripped into the already existing puddles.

The dead bodies concealed my quivering form. I didn't dare to ever again look up. Not for anything. Not even when I heard more shouts and booming thuds that shook the earth. I didn't want to see anything else. Not even the calming of the rain or the sound of quiet cries could wake me from the 'slumber' of darkness that I encased myself in.

The moments ticked by.

Eventually a tread of tracks splashed around the area. I heard the sound of boots and distant mumbles of men conversing with themselves. From drastic chaos to the silence of the forest seemed so unsettling, so unpredictable for my feeble mind.

"E-Elke?" Someone questioned before pulling the heavy weights off my beaten body. I didn't move, I barely breathed. My hands gripped my hair harder and I continued to smash my face farther into the ground. I didn't want to look up.

"Elke! Oh my god!" The voiced shouted again. This time, I was hoisted from the ground and held in someone's hold. Fingers ran around my neck. "Sh-she's alive? She's alive! Elke, Elke wake up!"

I flinched when the tips of fingers rubbed around my eyes. Slowly, I allowed my burning irises to meet the hellish world. There, under the sun, was Hanji with a flabbergasted look smeared across her mouth.

She felt around my head. "Are you ok? Oh god, Commander! Wait, no, uh Shortie!" Hanji called out. She got to her feet and began to carry me to the others. My mind spun in a million directions searching for recognition of that name.

"Levi! Levi, I found her. Sh-she's alive! I can't believe it!" Hanji shouted against my aching head. A few more footsteps pounded in our direction. I looked up to see at least one of my guardians. But instead, all I received were stunned expressions from everyone but who I wanted. The surviving soldier's couldn't control their words as they rambled on about the disaster and how a child survived it was beyond them.

"Levi!" Hanji rang again. She stepped closer to him. His shoulder was facing us, not his concerned eyes; it was as though his mind was elsewhere. "Levi, I found her. I found Elke. She's alive, just a little stunned."

My glassy sight watched as my guardian sheathed his blades and gradually looked our direction. His thin lip somewhat spread as he looked upon us. He made his way over and I was handed to him. His arms were somewhat stiff as he pulled me to his chest. Everything seemed robotic, a forced reunion.

He let out a tired heavy sigh.

And I completely lost it.

I couldn't control any of my emotions anymore. I cried horrible into his clothes and trembled so violently even the other men thought I was having seizure.

"M-mister Levi, L-levi, I'm s-so –so sorry! I'm sorry! I-I couldn't do any-anything. I was so scared. I- I-" I cried hysterically on his shoulder. Levi lightly rubbed my back and let me get my nerves out.

"I know," He said.

"I c-couldn't do anything. F-farlan, I-Isabel, I'm- I'm so sorry." I dug my head deeper into his solid support. Splashing footsteps approached.

"It's time to go. No reason to stick around." The Commander said. I felt Levi slightly nod and proceeded to head in the direction of the others. That's when it hit me.

"W-wait! We can't j-just leave. Mister L-Levi, what about o-our friends? What about-"

"They're dead." He sternly replied. I pulled back from his shoulder.

"No. No! No we can't leave them! No, they're family! They have to come back. They have to go home! We all have to go home!" I exclaimed. Levi did as before and held me tighter as I squirmed.

"There's no room on the carts. The dead stay. It doesn't matter now. Dead is dead," Levi said. Against the pain, my anger rose.

"Put me down! I'm not going. I'm not leaving them!"

"Stop moving brat." Levi snapped. With all my weight I shoved myself from his hold and stumbled to the ground. I pushed past him and ran back to the bloody sight. "Brat!" Levi threatened but I ignored him. I stopped when I saw Isabel. Her fixed stare looked to the clouds. My eyes built with tears as my legs gave out. How could I leave them?

"I-Isabel-" I whispered. I held out my hand but I couldn't bring myself to do anything. What do you do? My guts went queasy that the sight of her lone head. Seeing her like this was far more gruesome than actually seeing their deaths. My hand shook.

"Get up. The squad is waiting." Levi commanded. The agonizing pain burned into my chest. Why, why didn't I stay home? I clutched my aching heart.

Levi firmly gripped my arm. "I said get up! Now!" He yelled. Though I was sick with despair, a new emotion was soon flaring inside of me. I gritted my teeth.

"Why did you leave? Why did you leave us?" I asked trying to told back the tears. Levi's grip loosened.

"What?"

I turned around, "Why-Why did you leave? You left us all alone. You-you promised you would come back. You promised. But-but you never did! You never came back!" I screamed.

Levi's eyes widened and his tongue was at a loss for words.

I shook my head. "You promised us you would come back. You asked us to trust you. We trusted you! You're the leader and you said everything was going to be ok! You promised!" Levi jerked me to my feet. His hands grabbed each of my shoulders.

"How the fuck was I suppose to know a group of Titans would come? Huh? Who would have fucking guessed that? Tell me brat, huh?"

"You promised-" My voice trailed.

"Enough with the fucking promises! They don't mean shit in this world! I could promise you that the sun and that's not possible is it? Use your head, not everything can be sealed with a stupid finger shake! Damn brat." Levi sneered.

I sniffed in a gut-wrenching sob. "You're the strongest. You knew we needed you. Why-why did you leave us?" I asked again. Levi barely held his temper.

"Tch, we are leaving."

I couldn't argue or fight anymore. I let Levi drag me to the other waiting soldiers. It was hard to look at them. Their grim faces reminded me too much of the reality. My guardian flung me in the saddle and sat behind me as before. An arm buckled around me. Levi's tense body did little to ease how I felt. I didn't want to fight with him. I didn't want to lose the only person I had left.

"Scouts let's go home." The Commander instructed. The horses' feet splashed in the crimson puddles as the expedition came to an end.

I didn't expect such a crowd of people to be at the entrance of the gate.

It was nerve wracking to see so many citizens. So many with the dreaded expressions on their faces, tears rolled down their cheeks, or anger pulled at the corners of their lips. It felt as though the storm cloud had followed us home.

I caught sight of Isana.

Her happy face soon vanished as she realized the outcome of the situation. I had never seen her so surprised. Why are you surprised, friend? Never thought your plan could fail? Next to her was a boy I had never seen before, with dirty blonde locks and intense green eyes. He was shorter than her but seemed to have more of his wits. He knew, before Isana, that this mission was nothing more than a slaughtering. The boy shook his head and mumbled something to Isana.

The sickness spiked inside and I turned away before more tears could seep.

We headed through the town and back to HQ. The sun had pretty much begun to set and the day's despair didn't ease any ounce. A stable hand tended to Levi's mare, while he and I headed back to the 'room'.

The emptiness filled quickly when Levi shut the door. I looked to Farlan's bunk and saw the premade sheets and the untouched pillow. I knew he was to never sleep in the comforts of home. Never were he or Isabel to come home.

I bit my quivering lip.

Levi swung his jacket off his back and threw it over a nearby chair. "Get a shower before bed and hand me your clothes when you're done." I stood in the middle of the room without making a move or a peep. I couldn't bring myself to function.

Levi twisted around. "Brat, get moving. I don't want stains in those clothes."

I didn't look at him.

"Hey did you hear me-?" Levi froze when he heard my muffled cries. I tried to hold it in, but I just couldn't. I sobbed into my hands, unable to handle all the events that slammed into my life. I wasn't ready. I wasn't prepared to lose them.

"I wasn't ready," I cried. Levi sighed before making his way over to me. Gently he led me to the bathroom and helped me on top of the sink. He was quiet and quick with finding what he needed. He grabbed a damp cloth and some soap before tending to my face.

He removed my eye patch and began to scrub the dirt and dried blood from my skin. The cloth traveled from the side of my cheek to my neck and around the back. I let him rub my hands clean and get the mud from under my nails as well. Levi was talented and managed to knead the nasty substances from my matted hair. The tangles were gone and my skin practically glowed.

After my brisk clean up, Levi left and returned with some dry nightclothes. I managed without his aid to get dressed for bed while he took a shower. I couldn't get myself to lay on the mattress alone, so I waited for Levi. I sat on the floor with the creeping shivers while my back rested against the bed frame.

Though I was finally in the safety of the room and covered in the warm blankets like Farlan said I would, it still wasn't the same…

...because Levi never opened the pages to our favorite book.

 **Finished!**

 **Wow, was that a hard chapter to write!**

 **But I had tons of fun and I hope everyone enjoyed it as well!**

 **As always, would love to hear feedback or predictions of what you think will happen. Remember, I said this was a dark plot so…I wonder how twisted it's really going to get ;)**

 **Thanks a million to my editor, WhiteTiger and my information gatherer, EchoRunner. Without them, I would have given up on this chapter ages ago! (Echo Runner's personal OC has been hinted-all of you are going to love him!)**

 **Thanks to all my readers too…you keep the story alive!**

***NOTE*** There is a reason why I made the horses "unpredictable" and "restless" it is a huge part of the story! Let's just say….they have some training to do ;)


	17. (Füllstoff)

**Hello readers your author Enked here.**

 **So, I decided to indulge in a small "filler" for this series. I couldn't resist adding some humor to give some giggles instead of tears.**

 **Now, this is more mature humor…what I mean is…think about how "dramatic" kids are, right? They blow everything out of proportion and end up making things worse by covering up mistakes.**

 **Keep in mind how goofy Isabel an Elke are and remember our stern heart throb Levi…he's humorous on his own!**

 **Again, this filler is just for laughs. It is meant to be just like an "anime funny". Just let your imagination run while and enjoy this late little weekend treat!**

 **I would really like to thank my editors WhiteTiger and EchoRunner who constantly help and support this entire story behind the scenes.**

 **Also SPECIAL thanks to Gussy Phantom for that incredible and heart melting review! I truly believe that is the longest and most amazing fanfiction reviews anyone has ever seen!**

 **From everyone's contribution the story lives on!**

*Flashback to underground when Isabel, Farlan, Levi and Elke were all together *

* * *

 _People tell me memories never truly die._

 _They tell me that we carry those moments forever in our hearts._

 _I suppose they are right._

 _Especially when it involves; pants, toilet paper and tea leafs._

Isabel let out an irritated groan, "Why do chores have to be so boring?" She exclaimed after she threw down the mop and then flopped her stomach on the couch. "Seriously, they get to have all the fun while we are stuck here like caged animals."

I looked up from the dishes I was scrubbing. My hands were starting to slightly blister from having them soaked in the water for too long. I would never admit it, but I was starting to get a little tired of the chores too.

I had been with them for several months and the expectations had yet to change. Every morning, the 'to-do' list was handed over at eight and not a single task was ever crossed off. Routine made order; and order equaled perfection. In Levi's case, perfection was having the place shining like a copper coin even though we had wooden floors.

I let out light sigh. "Yea, but you know Mister Levi. The whole world would come to an end if these things aren't done." I placed another clean plate to the side.

"Hey, let's take a break." Isabel happily piped up. I paused for a moment and looked behind me.

"What? We can't. Mister Levi wants the chores done before he gets home." I pulled my hands up and began using my fingers to count. "Besides, we still have dusting, laundry, and we have to clean under your bed. Remember? Mister Levi's been upset about the smell. What do you put under there, anyway-?" I questioned but Isabel wasn't listening. Instead, she had bounced up from the couch and was excitedly getting her sticky fingers into something.

"Oh don't be a fun sucker like Levi-bro." Isabel laughed as she messed around with the water filled pale on the floor. I frowned.

"I'm not a fun sucker, I just-" I was about to lecture the importance of discipline when Isabel shot up and reeled her arm back.

A huge smile was plastered on her face, "In coming!" She shouted and launched an unknown object at me. I squealed and ducked in time just as the item flew at my head. I heard a loud splat. I stood up and watched as a wet cloth slimed its way down the wall.

It looked like yesterday's dinner.

"I-Isabel! Are you crazy? What-?" Suddenly a wet cloth leeched onto my face. I screamed and pulled the cold rag from my skin. My red headed sister was doubled over and nearly in tears. She kept pointing at my disgusted face and giggling at my obviousness.

"I got ya good, Elke!" She laughed before collecting herself. "That's a score for the Captain!" She pointed her thumb at herself.

"Why are you Captain?" I asked as I toyed with the damp fabric. Isabel snorted in a childish manor.

"Cuz, I'm older. Leaders are always old cuz they're the wisest." Isabel explained proudly. I huffed. Then I let a smirk roll on my cheeks when an idea came to mind.

"Fine, then I'm the thug." I replied. Isabel put her hands are her hips and raised a brow.

"A thug? Why do you want to be-?" The wet rag she had launched at me was now stuck her face.

I laughed, "cuz that's what you guys are. Mister Levi is strong too, and that is what I want to be someday." Isabel peeled the rag from her head and nodded.

"Alright then, let the Captain and thug rivalry begin!" Isabel hollered as she snatched another cleaning cloth from a nearby table. She dunked it the water and got ready for the battle. I too grabbed the other cloth by the dishes, it was like holding a cannon ball and I was the cannon.

"Better run Captain! You can't beat the best street thug," I said as giddy as ever. Isabel and I hardly ever got to play. Though times were fun underground, many of days were still filled with the pressures of survival. We were lucky; sometimes our imaginations got to run wild.

"Prepare to meet your fate." Isabel grinned before throwing another cloth ball in my direction. I felt the blob hit my shoulder and I giggled with excitement. I dramatically summersaulted around a table and threw my bullet as well.

My sister roared with laughter and took the hit as I did. We managed to target each other with whatever useable objects we could find. Sponges, dust ruffles, pillows, food, and it all eventually led to buckets of water being splashed at each other. We wrestled, jumped on the furniture like monkeys, and built small fall out shelters from the knocked over tables.

We pretended to guard our kingdoms and rule our people like we had heard in books. Isabel was noble and I was like Levi, an unannounced king of alley. The 'war' lasted longer than expected. If it weren't for the hands on the clock, we would have sworn the fun was only for a few moments.

Isabel and I rolled around on the floor in fits of giggles. From our hair to our shoes we each were soaking wet. Our lungs gasped for air as we began to recover from our fun.

"I win." I panted with a smile, as I lay sprawled out on the floor next to my sister. The red head snickered.

"You cheated. You can't launch two overly ripped tomatoes at once. That blinded me, that's why you were able to steal all the ammo. If you had played fair I would have won."

I shot her another grin. "I'm a thug; ruler of the underground. It's in my blood." Isabel lightly punched my shoulder her face still filled with glee.

"I'll get ya next time," Isabel said. I nodded before pulling myself up with the aid from the tipped over table. I rested my arms over its legs and starred at the clock. My smile quickly faded.

"Oh no! I-Isabel h-have you looked at the clock?" I asked in a panicked tone. My sister sat up with a clump of bread in her mouth.

"Don't know, but I'm starved." She took a bite and gagged. "Yuck, it's stale." My eyes were wide with worry and my mouth had shrunk as though I had just sucked a sour fruit.

"It's noon!" I yelled as I stumbled to my feet. I ran into the kitchen area and frantically began throwing things in the garbage. "Isabel-Isabel hurry start sweeping the floor! I'll-I'll oh I'll start on the laundry!"

Isabel moaned as she sat up like a tired chipmunk with stuffed cheeks. "Ugh, Elke you're killin' me." I flew into each room and collected the dirty clothes; with arms full I made my way to the outside tub and threw them in the water. I scurried back inside and maneuvered around the mess and lazy Isabel.

"Ok, that's soaking. Ok-ok uh," I paused as my stomach dropped. "I forgot about Mister Levi's clothes!" I screamed and ran to his room and yanked his pants from the drawers. They were neatly folded and prepared for their weekly washing.

I zoomed back into the room and unfolded their creases. I gave up on trying to properly preparing the procedure since time was my enemy.

"They could be back any moment! Isabel how are you just standing there?" I shrieked. My sister swallowed her food and picked up another mushy fruit.

"Oh Elke don't worry. They won't notice a thing."

I peered around the room with bug-sized eyes. "You are crazy! How can-? Never mind, hand me the soap cleaner. Mister Levi only believes in personal hand washing before a separate soak. You know how he is!" I stretched the fabric out on the floor as Isabel lazily made her way to the jug behind the chair.

"Here," She said. I snatched the cleaner and quickly spilled a large amount over the back of the dark pants. I had done this routine hundreds of times and could have executed it perfectly in my sleep. I wasn't concerned with the process I just had the clock against me.

I grabbed a nearby rag, inspected it to be sure it was still clean, and proceeded to knead out the 'filth'. My hands followed what Levi had instructed. Two scrubs up and down, then another two pushes left to right, and followed by a circular motion. This was to ensure no grime lingered. Not to mention after three consecutive uses the rag needed to be rinsed in the bucket before further cleaning.

I took a moment to retrieve the pale and fill it with water. After slipping on an unseen soggy sponge, I made my way back to the pants. I knelt on floor once more and started the motions again. Suddenly my heart stopped.

"Huh?" I gasped. My eyes watched as the horrible magic unfolded before me. I rubbed my shrunken pupils as I tried to clear my vision. "This isn't happening. This can't be happening!" I shouted.

"What is it?" Isabel asked in a daze as she strolled forward.

I flung the pants up high as my adrenaline soared. "Oh no-no-no-!" Then I turned them around to face her with sicken expression crossing my face. "Do you see this?"

Isabel squinted and pursed her lips. "Yea, but I don't remember pants having a huge white spot on them."

"That's because they don't!" I cringed. Isabel titled her head then poked at the fabric.

"Hmm," She pondered. "Well, its not like he's going to notice, it's on the butt anyway. Looks like you're safe." Isabel grinned. I pulled the pants down and gave her a horrid look. Even with a blind eye, my expression was clear.

"I'm dead! Oh no! Oh gosh, he's going to kill me!" I flew the pants high in the air and pulled the skin down from under my eyes. I paced around the room. "I'm going to have to change my name, get a different eye patch and live under another staircase! I'll have to gather food at night and hide during the day! Oh my-" A lump unexpectedly clanked against my head. I looked at Isabel.

"Good grief Elke calm down." Isabel muttered as she crewed on the other half of food. The other part lay at my feet. "We'll just fix it up. No problem, Levi-bro will never find out and you can still live under our staircase."

I pinched my brows; "I live under the staircase, now? I don't get to keep my room?" I motioned to my bed. Isabel shrugged and made her to a nearby dresser, which wasn't exactly standing anymore. She pulled the wooden drawers out and fished around for something. I was still trying to decide if I lived under the stairs or not.

"Ah ha! Gotcha!" Isabel cheered. "This will fix everything," she said. I picked up Levi's ebony pants and looked at the white spot and then at my sister.

"Really?" I asked in amazement. I was relieved to hear that my skin wasn't going to be peeled off and used as a pelt.

"Sure! See this Elke?" Isabel held up a small glass jar. "This is good stuff here. Fancy ink from the best merchants and stolen from the best thugs." My sister winked.

"Oh-oh ok? But how does fancy ink help with the spot?" I asked. Isabel vibrated her lips as she came to me.

"Oh come on Elke it's so simple. We will pour the black ink on the spot and it will be covered in no time. Instant fix." Isabel said as she helped me spread the pants on the floor with the butt part facing up.

"You sure about this?"

Isabel unscrewed the cap. "Have I ever steered ya wrong?" Mentally I nodded.

Though Isabel never meant to, she and I were constantly getting into trouble. Once, she convinced me we could use Levi's books as mini ships in the tub to play. Levi about hemorrhaged. Then there was the time she decided we could make dinner ourselves and attempted to use the stove. She had never mixed ingredients for soup before or even knew how to control a flame; the end result was there was bubbling goo that flooded most of the entire floor. And not to mention, when Farlan and Levi tried to control the situation the fire roared so intensely it singed off their eyebrows.

Levi was more irritated about the floor clean up.

"Uh," Isabel choked. My thoughts snapped back to the pants. My face melted.

"I-Isabel! What did you do?" I cried. I starred at the pants and the blotchy poke-o-dot appearance that grew over the white.

"I-I just poured the ink over it! Ok-ok don't panic." Isabel frantically pulled over the cleaning jug and began to inspect the container. "Oh," Isabel said.

"What?"

"This is that stuff Levi-bro uses when he cleans the floors. You know it has that terrible smell? Why did you use Bleach, Elke?"

My skin flushed white, "Ha? Wh-what are you talking about? I didn't mean to use that! That's-that's what you handed me!" I quickly defended myself.

"Wow, you're doomed for sure." Isabel shook her head.

"Hey it's your fault too!" I wailed. "If you had read the thing right I wouldn't have used the wrong stuff! You're doomed too!"

Isabel pointed her finger at me. "Yeah but you physically poured it! Your fingerprints are all over it. Levi-bro only blames whoever touches it last!"

I paused as my eyes looked at my sister who was still holding the Bleach. Isabel gasped as she realized she was knee deep in shit too.

"Ah! Fine, we're both doomed. So we just have to work together to save our own butts." Isabel said as she placed the jug down. Her face started to show the beads of sweat as she thought hard about what to do.

I looked at the ink and suddenly an idea formed into my pea head. "Maybe we need to mix them? Maybe since the Bleach takes away the color it could take out the white and the ink will just fill in the rest?"

Isabel's face lite up. "That's brilliant Elke!" Quickly I pulled a bucket over and helped Isabel pour the two liquids together. We found a wooden spoon from under the forts and stirred until we were convinced the white and black were blended.

"1-2-3!" We said together as we watched the substance pool over the pants. The chemicals bled into the fibers.

I shrieked, "Ahhh! Why is this happening?" I pulled my hair with my sweaty hands. "The spot is getting bigger! The white is spreading like a disease!"

Isabel's teeth chattered. "Oh jeez, ok new plan! We need something uh natural. Yeah something natural not fake. The ink is fake so that's why it's not working."

"N-natural? Y-you mean like tea?" I asked with a pounding heart. The clock's hands were ticking inside my head.

"Tea? Yea, tea that's perfect! Good job, Elke!" Isabel happily slapped my back. She got to her feet and ran to the kitchen. She slipped on the wet floor as she got to the cabinet.

"But Isabel tea isn't black," I said.

"Oh yes it is!" Isabel hollered as she grabbed a tin container. She skid her knees across the floor as she met back with me.

"Look, Black Tea! B-L-A-C-K and those pants are B-L-A-C-K. We're gonna live!" Isabel hooted.

"We still have to brew it," I said. Isabel grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the kitchen. There was no stopping her once she decided to cover her behind. She was just in trouble a few days ago for clogging the toilet so her determination was running high today.

"Alright, Elke make some tea!"

I gulped then cracked a few neck bones and rolled up my sleeves. Making tea was an art. It took patience, precision, and obedience, all of which were qualities my sister never had. After a stressful half hour of heart pounding fails, I finally gave birth to perfection.

It sat steaming in a polished cup.

I was a sweaty mess and the counter looked as though a tornado had blown over it. There were dishes, tea leafs, and utensils everywhere. Not a free space in sight.

I picked up the tin can and shook it. "We used up all the leafs! Isabel-Isabel he's gonna notice! Mister Levi's going to-"

Isabel yanked my shirt and headed back to the pants. "We'll stuff it with some colored paper later. The pants are more important!"

We sat around the black jeans as if it was a sacrificial ceremony. The lighting in the room drastically darkened as though we were by a fire pit. The air thickened with tension. Isabel wore the most determined expression I had ever seen. Her hope, our hope rested with that lone cup.

"Ready?" She asked.

I swallowed a lump. "Do it." I replied while I held down the unmoving pants. This was serious. Isabel gulped and proceeded to tilt the cup over the blotchy black and white fist size spot.

The dark liquid coated the pants and Isabel and I watched with nail biting teeth. We were praying to Jesus the entire time.

Slowly the white began to darken.

Isabel and I took sigh of relief.

"That was a close one." Isabel heaved out a long held in breath. I whipped a drop of sweat from my brow.

"Yea, we would have been dead for sure. Now we just have to-"I paused as I looked at the jeans. "Ah not again!" I yelled as I violently shook my head with my hands gripping the sides of my face.

"Oh jeez," Isabel groaned with a sickened tone.

I went into a ballistic scream and ran around the room like a chicken with my head cut off. I knocked into furniture, slammed into walls, and even tumbled into the trashcan. All didn't matter, I continued to yell frantically and carried the trash bin over my head as I blew off the frustration within me.

"We're dead!" I echoed under the lid as I suddenly ran into another plastered wall. The bin that was over my upper half caused me to bounce off and roll across the floor. I decided to linger in the trash until my actual grave was to be dug.

"Common on we still have some time!" Isabel said as she pulled me from the bin. I looked at the stained pants. A mix of white, black, and now brown was all smeared together right near the crack of the pants. I just about fainted.

"Save yourself Isabel. I'll hold the fort down for you," I dramatically whispered to her. Isabel gritted her teeth and held my weak hand.

"No! I'll never leave a sister behind! As long as there is fruit, toilet paper, and a dream we will live. Now come on, don't quite on me now!" Isabel forcefully pulled my weak body to my feet and together we worked against the clock.

The surgery lasted a good hour but once it was completed all that was left was to remain "cool".

* * *

"Hey guys we're home-" Farlan halted as he stood in the doorway. He must have noticed the scene before him. Here, in the middle of the disaster lay two "battered" girls. Isabel's idea was to rub trash all over us and pretend we were knocked unconscious. All seemed logical at the time.

"What the heck happened?" Farlan asked as he came closer to inspect us. Levi stood back as he was taking in the unimaginable destruction that came to his house. Isabel nudged me as she sat wearily up. She had great acting skills.

She pitifully coughed, "Dammit, thank god you guys are here. Those-those punks from the other day c-came back and they decided to tear the place apart! We were no match, right Elke?"

Y-yeah," I groaned and tried to play my part too. I pulled myself into a sitting position and rubbed my head. "I-I tried to ask them to l-leave but they just hit me on the head and r-ran away."

Farlan leaned over and reached towards the top of my head. "They hit you with a banana peel?" He asked as he waved the flappy fruit in front of me. My eyes went wide.

"Uh-Uh-Uh," I stuttered. "They didn't want to use a real weapon cuz that would leave fingerprints and then Mister Levi would hunt them down and get them. That's why they used f-fruit uh, this time."

Farlan and Isabel just gave me a what-the-fuck-expression. When my blonde headed guardian turned around towards Levi I shrugged my shoulders and lipped, 'that's all I could think of' to Isabel. My sister just face palmed herself. My cheeks heated from embarrassment at how stupid I sounded.

A banana for a weapon, that was the best I could think of?

Levi strolled passed us without even glancing. "Well seems as though those bastards need to be taught a lesson. I''ll need to change to get the job done." I frantically glanced at Isabel whose face looked stoned with fear. Again, I lost my marbles and latched onto Levi's pant leg. I felt my stomach being dragged over the slimy floor.

"W-wait Mister Levi! You can't! They're too dangerous! You'll get hurt!" Levi clicked his tongue.

"Tch, I'm so sure."

"Don't you want to clean up the mess? It's filthy in here!" I exclaimed desperately as Levi continued to drag me to his room.

"You know where the tools are. Get to it," Levi said as he moved a piece of furniture out of the way.

"But-But maybe it wasn't them! Maybe it was someone else! Then you'll just be beating up the wrong people. And that's not very nice!" I protested. Levi placed his hands on his room's door way and looked over his shoulder and at me.

"You saying it wasn't them? Then who was it, brat?" Levi coldly asked but more like stated. His eyes were piercing through me as though he was 100% sure of the answer. The jitters grew inside of me. I couldn't tell the truth. I didn't want to live under another staircase and eat bugs for dinner.

I let go of his pant leg and sulked back. "Yeah it was them and make sure to take away the bananas." I rubbed the back of my neck.

Levi raised a brow before slamming his door shut.

Oh god.

The minutes passed and Isabel and I were busy tending to the mess. Farlan was counting the money from the 'haul' and was overseeing us as well. I picked up another mushy peel and threw it in the trash. The place was going to take forever to clean. Levi was going to work us until we scrubbed ourselves into the ground.

Suddenly Levi's door opened and our leader made his way to the front. He began to grab a few items from the floor and that's when Farlan peered up from his activity. Isabel and I froze as we saw Farlan's eyes grow and his mouth drop.

"Uh, L-Levi-?" Farlan began to say as he stood from the couch but Isabel and I were quicker and instantly pounced on him. All three of us tumbled to the ground. Isabel clamped her hand over his mouth and I wrapped myself over his lower half.

Levi turned his head around and his brow twitched at the sight. "You guys are idiots." He groaned. His hands went to adjusting his belt. Farlan wrestled under us and kept trying to tell Levi exactly what he saw. Not to say what he was witnessing was far from exaggeration it was indeed a startling sight.

After the tea stain, Isabel made a latch ditch effort to mend the problem herself. Neither of us knew how to sew so the next best thing was 'glue'. She used rotten fruit as the sticky goo to stick the toilet paper to the white spot. She dabbed more ink over the bathroom tissue and decided it worked well enough to cover the obvious. What Isabel and I didn't predict was once the 'glue' dried, after being shoved in the dresser, that the toilet paper wasn't going to exactly hold up.

Levi cinched another notch on his belt and adjusted a pocket in his shirt. He then reached for the door handle.

"You have something you want to say Isabel?" Levi asked in a cool manor. I could hear my sister chew her lip.

"Nah, Levi-bro, just uh, good luck!" Levi looked at me.

"What about you brat? You look as though you haven't shit in weeks." I nervously gulped and shook my head.

"I went this morning, Sir. " I whispered robotically as my palms sweated. I couldn't stop staring at the butt of his pants. Oh sweet Jesus it was horrible, just horrible. It was worse than when his eyebrows were missing.

The toilet paper was peeling away from the crack of the pants and was clinging by just by some tiny strains of rotten fruit home made goo. And underneath the brown tea stain was clearly showing through. It took just like…

"Shit," Levi huffed. "This is a fucking pain." And with that he slammed the front door and was on his way to the outside world. The three of us sat their as stiff as corpses. Isabel didn't move her hand, I didn't un cling myself, and Faraln just lay there in dead silence.

We just let Levi, _the Levi,_ leave the house with toilet paper and stains all over the butt of his pants.

"Think he'll notice?" I asked Isabel.

* * *

Let's just say, he more than noticed.

He decided not "to turn the other cheek" instead he got his revenge. Even though we had apologized numerous times it made no difference to Levi.

The following weeks, when we least expected it, Isabel and I woke up with no eyebrows and all of our clothes had been bleached and shrunk about three sizes too small.

We looked like bald stuffed pigs.

Moving was difficult everything pinched and squeaked when we walked. Not to mention our pants rode up our butts. Sitting down wasn't enjoyable either since we collected every spec of dust around and it was visible from a distance.

"Why don't we have eyebrows anymore, Mister Levi?" I asked as I tried to make my skin move where my furry friends use to be. Levi sat at his table cleaning one of his blades.

"Because you guys wasted all my favorite tea leafs. That's a crime not to go unpunished." Levi replied. Farlan shook his head and held back a chuckle while he leaned against a wall.

I tried to move my stuck arms but nothing worked. My shirt was so tight it barely covered my stomach. "So, when did you notice?" I asked. Levi laid his blade down and looked at me.

"The second I pulled them from the dresser. I knew they hadn't been washed."

"Then how come you put them on?"

Levi leaned back in his chair. "I was testing you. I wanted to see if you two idiots would confess. When you didn't I stepped outside the door then rounded around back and went back to the room and changed. As predicted you failed and thus had to be punished."

I frowned knowing he wasn't humiliated not once. As usual Levi was too clever.

"Elke!" Isabel hollered. I turned around to see her waddling into the room. Her pants were not even touching her knees. She came towards me and quickly slathered two swipes over my eyes.

I flinched, "What was that for?"

"There, now ya got some brows! I found some charcoal under my bed; you know where I got the rotten fruit? We just paint this black dust on our faces and no one will notice a thing!"

I blinked and looked at my other guardians.

Farlan's cheeks were puffing so badly as he tried to hold his laughter. Levi simply crossed his arms and the amusement was just hidden under that steal mask of his.

"Well, that's good to hear. I've wanted my Black Tea Leafs to be refilled anyways," Levi said. Isabel and I groaned knowing all to well what that implied. She and I didn't even try to argue. We grabbed the money and squeaked our waddling butts to the door.

Levi cleared his throat, "Better hurry back though, the laundry needs washing."

* * *

 **Hahaha! XD**

 **Oh, I enjoyed myself too much in making this little "filler"! I seriously couldn't stop laughing!**

 **I'm hoping to make some more little fillers in the future. Those who are interested in sharing ideas…P'M me and I might select yours to write about next!**

 **It can be a funny moment or a serious touching one doesn't matter. They are nice break from the story's tension** **J**

 **I'm currently working on the next chapter and it's coming along beautifully. It will not be published until I am done with finals so hang in there with me.**

 **Again, can't thank everyone for all the love and support. Seriously you guys rock! All the reviews just send my heart leaping with joy. P.S Elke thanks you too!**

 ***To everyone who has messaged/reviewed I have not forgotten about you just have been busy! Will catch up with everyone after finals! ***

 **Thanks!**


	18. (Füllstoff 2)

**Hey readers,**

 **So I couldn't resist adding this small "filler" in between my finals (because we all know how much fun studying is…not)**

 **This is not for "humor" this is a serious side chapter to show some major points that will be happening soon.**

 **Some parts are "dark"… but as I mentioned its part of the story.**

 **Special thanks to EchoRunner who inspired a new plot!**

 *****Note did not edit at all, sorry no time*****

 **Enjoy!**

* * *

The thunder cracked across the dark sky.

Instantly, my eyes shot open and my chest heaved with anxiety. Three days, it's _been_ three days since expedition and still I couldn't catch my breath. I lay on the mattress with clothes completely soaked as though I had just plunged into a lake of water. Even my hair was damp to the very ends.

Another wave of thunder boomed from outside.

My stomached twisted. The nerves inside me crawled as my memory began to flash to that horrible day only so many hours ago. The pain between my ribcage was unbearable. I was barely getting anything to eat and sleep was nothing but torture.

I hated nighttime…it only brought the monsters.

I shyly turned my head to the side only to see an empty spot with untouched sheets. The tears began to swell in the corners of my eyes. I was alone. This hollow feeling was my worst fear; it plagued me since I could remember. Being abandoned, being forgotten was every kid's hell. I just wanted warmth and any ounce of comfort I could swallow.

Though I had stayed with Levi on the first night, it was requested that I return to the girl's dorm as soon as possible. It was considered 'unethical' to have a girl staying with a group of male soldiers and thus led to my banishment to the old room where Isabel and I stayed. Yesterday was bad enough, but the added storm of tonight was sending my entire body into a fit of uncontrollable jitters.

I was sick and scared beyond my fits. Laying helplessly on my back and confined to a room with creeping shadows had me leaping out of bed at the next flash of lighting. I didn't bother with a coat or even shoes for that matter; all I did was fling the door open and race down the hall.

No light for guidance, I blindly ran the building until I found the nearest exit. I shoved open the door, not caring about any noise, and bolted across the courtyard. My tired feet hit each cobblestone hard enough to ring the bones inside. I stumbled a few times, earned a few scrapes in the rain, but still I ventured on. My heart pounded like a hammer against my scrawny chest as I found the doorknob to the male's dormitory.

I didn't even hesitate; I ran inside up the flight of stairs and down the familiar hall to where I knew my guardian was. I was fighting every ach in my body. Though I felt ill to the core and fatigued, I wasn't going to stop until I knew I could be safe. And all I knew was security meant being with Levi.

As I flew down the hall and headed closer to my caretaker's room, my ear caught a voice that slightly washed some relief into me. I slowed down, when I came to the door. There was nothing unusual about this particular entrance, it was as plain as the others, but a glow a light was hinted in the cracks. I held in my panting breaths as I listened carefully.

"So you think this will do, once you receive your promotion? Personally, I find it quite suiting for a man of your taste." A deep voice spoke.

"It's better than the shitty place I currently have." Levi muttered.

"Levi, I know this all must still be hard on you. However, the past is beyond us and you must look forward to what humanity can possibly accomplish in the near future. We are close, so very close-"

I heard a stomp of a footstep. "I'm not here to discuss that. I'm aware of choices I made and I'm _fully_ capable of seeing my discussions through."

The other man sounded as though he cleared his throat. I held my breath more as I leaned closer and allowed my good eye to peer into the crack of the door. I saw Levi's back and Commander Erwin resting against a desk with his brows set sternly over his blue eyes.

"Is that so?" The commander questioned.

"Tch, don't harass me," Levi snapped. The blonde solider paused for a brief moment, which allowed his eyes to drift before sharply glancing right back at Levi.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't believe you calculated _her_ into the equation. Seems as though your plan didn't quite add up to the outcome you had hoped," Ewrin said.

" _She_ has nothing to do with any of this. It would be the same regardless-" Levi was abruptly interrupted. The commander straightened his back his tone deepened.

"Perhaps you're mistaken. Maybe this evolves _her_ entirely."

I stood there confused. Who were they talking about? Why were they talking in the night so secretively? I listened a bit more, my curiously once again getting the better of me.

"You're out of your damn mind. _She_ happened out there by accident, nothing more. So quite rambling your nonsense. It's making me sick," Levi growled before he was about to turn to leave when the Commander caught his attention.

"Was it an accident? As the Commander it is my duty to question the unimaginable. Living in a world full of monstrous beasts and humans having the ability to fly across towers has made me second-guess many unrealistic thoughts. That day is no exception."

Levi slowly turned back around, his body ridged. "What exactly are you getting at?"

"I'm proposing a theory here Levi. I'm stating that I do not believe _they_ , along with many others, died upon a series of unfortunate events. Titan's strike randomly yes, but that many and without the slightest of warnings seems too unlikely. There was probably something that drew them in like bees to the sweetness of honey." Erwin faced Levi with a serious expression chiseled on face. The storm roared behind them.

My guardian was silent for a moment before he aggressively spoke back. "You're accusing _her_ for their deaths? You sick-"

"A disappearance followed by a strange injury seems to be the missing links you are simply denying to yourself. That was no ordinary cut nor did it stop bleeding for quite some time. Interesting is it not, to think something like a crimson sweetness could lure the beasts in from the forest so many yards away? The puzzle all fits Levi."

My guardian was silent for a good while. I was still lost, both in the conversation and internally as well. My head didn't seem to make connections anymore because my heart was constantly screaming. I was just as miserably as the day before I met my caretakers. I was beaten down, on the verge of toxic numbness and chilled to the core, only now the pain was worse. Much worse. I had memories this time, flashbacks of where the agony came from.

Farlan…

Isabel…

The wind hollowed and the thunder let out another boom that shook the walls. The fear inside me soared. I didn't hold back the pitiful tears as I tore into the room. I didn't bother to excuse myself, manners were forgotten, and my arms grabbed onto the only support I knew.

"E-Elke? What are you doing-?" Levi tried to ask but I buried my head as deep as I could into his clothes. I trembled as I pleaded.

"M-Mister Levi, please don't leave me alone. Please, please I don't want to be left. You promised, you promised you would stay! I need you, please…." My words trailed off as the sobs from my raspy throat intensified. I could barely keep from choking.

Levi pulled me back and I stared up at him begging for him to comply. Those grey eyes just looked me over.

"Look at you, you're a mess. No shoes, no coat, no…"

I moved into body once more as the storm continued to echo. I was so terrified that I didn't care if I was to be punished tomorrow so long as I didn't have to be alone tonight. Yes, I just wanted to be held for the remaining hours of the long night.

"L-Levi I want to go h-home," I whispered as I cried. My guardian stiffened at my words. His eyes widened immensely. I heard the commander making his way to the exit. Except he halted and turned unexpectedly towards me, and I had forgotten the most import rule of all.

I heard him slightly gasp and I pitifully looked at him like an idiot. The commander looked intensely at me. "So, that's what's been hiding under that patch all along." I gulped a wad of saliva down my sore throat. Levi quickly slapped a hand over my eye and pulled my head back into his clothes.

"This doesn't concern you or anyone else for that matter. She's the same kid regardless of what you have witnessed," Levi snapped. I hid in his arms, ashamed, afraid of not only myself but of world now too. The commander let out a slight huff.

"We will discuss this later," he said. "Besides it seems as though you have other obligations to attend to for the evening." I didn't catch Erwin's coolness towards me, but Levi must have because once the blonde solider left Levi let out a deep tired breathe of his own.

My guardian then placed a hand on my head and smoothed out the damp threads. "Come on."

I followed Levi out the room and back to the place where he retired for the nights. It was much warmer than where Isabel and I stayed. Levi's room rested right above the furnace and instant warmth greeted anyone who came in. My caretaker led me to the small wooden table and made me wait there. I still slightly shook as the water dripped from my skin. A puddle began to form as Levi returned.

"Alright, you'll have to make due with some other clothes for tonight," Levi said as he held out a dry shirt. Though it was dark in the room, with only a hint of candlelight, I could still make out what he was holding.

"Is-Is that F-Farlan's?" I asked. Levi didn't say a word but moved quickly to remove my wet nightclothes. He also had grabbed a towel and managed to have me dry and in that over sized shirt in a matter of seconds. I peered down to barely seeing my toes. The top was roomy, so much so it fit more like a long dress than an actual shirt. The warmth was still there and the delightful scent too.

I clutched the long sleeves and snuggled my cheek into the fabric.

I missed them so much; I just wanted them to hold me again. I wanted to be promised, with two fingers and a double swear that everything would forever be alight. But that all seemed to be an impossible dream.

Before I realized it, I was lifted from the ground and into the cradling hold I hadn't felt in what seemed like ages. I linked my arms around Levi's neck and nestled my wet eyes into his skin. A hand ran down and up my back to sooth my crippled soul.

"I don't want you to be afraid of storms," Levi said. I sniffled a few times through my congested nose.

"It's just like that day…" I replied. The memories were beginning to boil to the surface.

"There are many more days like this to come. You can't be shaken by every little noise or flash of light. It's going to paralyze you forever otherwise."

My lip began to quiver. "Then why can't we go home? Can't we go back to where there is no sun? Storms n-never happened there."

"There is nothing for us there," Levi replied. I shook my head doubting his words.

"We had everything there. I loved it there. Can't we go back? I just want to be in our room with that story. I want the old blankets and the squeaky bed. It was always safe there. There was no monsters," I confessed.

"There were monsters there too," Levi replied. His hand rested on my shoulder blades. "You just never saw them…" For a moment I was speechless. That little home was the only place, I felt I could close my eyes and drift away to my happiest of dreams, and I never feared anything. Monsters didn't torment our house because they were always there. Farlan, Isabel, and Levi, someone was always _there_ to fight the demons.

I quietly spoke in a shallow voice, "Did you fight them off, Mister Levi? Is that way we were always safe?" Levi carried me to lower mattress of the bunk bed. The sheets were as crisp as ever and smooth to the touch. In one fluid motion, Levi sat down and pulled me into his arms. We both sat up, Levi rested against the bed's frame and I leaned into Levi's chest. The storm continued to grow more agitated as the night trailed on.

"Yeah brat, that's what I did. I tried to shield you from the evil that lurks in the world, but I seemed to have failed you this time. _We all failed._ We were such fucking idiots to think it was possible, " Levi said and I looked up to see him gazing far beyond our room. To what, I wasn't sure.

I rolled my chin up towards him to get a better view. His face was hard and eyes set with an unhealthy amount of hate burned into his irises.

"A-are you mad at me?" I asked sheepishly. Levi broke his stare and slowly looked down.

"No," Levi sighed.

"Do you hate me?" Levi moved my wet bangs around my forehead. His lips tight until words finally came.

"Of course not. Life is just being difficult right now. You will understand once you're older. It's not easy always caring for others. You never know what's the better choice to make."

My head was a bit jumbled. I was referring to not wearing my eye patch but Levi seemed to be hinting towards something else. Something that I wasn't fully grasping at the time was tension that was bearing down on my caretaker. The responsibility that had been piled on his shoulders had to be such an enormous load. No, I couldn't imagine playing solider then having to parent. He never had asked for the duty and yet, he was pushed right into the position over night. It took many years later for me to finally see where everything went wrong.

Levi laid the back of his hand to my cheeks. "Shit, you are burning up. Have another nasty fever. You have the worst immune system, brat," he said while he began to slip off his unformed jacket. He wrapped the stiff leather over my shoulders.

I leaned my head to his body once more. That's when I heard that wonderful fluttering of his heart like the sound of humming wings. It was gentle yet so strong in its rhythm. For some reason, in that moment, a thought came to mind. Something sparked an old greyish memory to come back to life.

"Mister Levi," I began.

"Hm?"

"What are your parents like?" I asked. An uncomfortable silence filled the room as I waited for a reply. Part of me began to grow nervous, had I said something too risky for conversation? Then another side of me was too curious not to know. Levi, was so grand, surely he was raised by proper parents in a proper home…

"I never knew my father," Levi finally said.

I was stunned.

"My mother, well she…" Levi again was at a loss for words. I touched his hand that was placed on my head.

"What is she like?"

Levi swallowed before he began to stroke my hair once more. "She was a good women, always attentive and very nurturing."

"Would I like her?"

I felt my guardian lightly nod his head. "Yeah, very much so."

"W-would she like me?" I asked as I now looked up at him.

"Yea, she had a thing for brown eye brats."

I somewhat smiled enjoying the small intimate conversation between us. Talking about Levi's mother made me feel closer to the past that I couldn't seem to remember. I would have certain memories but they seemed to disappear before I could verbalize what I saw.

"Can we see her some time?"

Levi's eyes drifted. "She's no longer alive. She died when I was young, about your age," My guardian confessed.

"O-Oh," I muttered not realizing the sore spot I had just created.

"Yea, even I was forced to be alone for sometime. I remember being afraid, too scared to leave my mother's side. I still remember the hunger pains and the dirt and the grim that covered me. I sat there waiting for her to wake. But she never did." Levi said matter-of-factly as though it was just an ordinary conversation.

"But you're strong so that's why you made it. You're the leader that's why you always win," I explained. Levi listened to my childish reasoning while the storm still rumbled outside.

"I wasn't always like this. Everyone is a scrawny brat once in their life. Everyone suffers and eventually everyone grows." My caretaker pulled the jacket more over my shoulders. I snuggled as deep as I could muster while Levi continued. "Some just don't take advantage of it. Mentally you have to wise, physically you have to able, otherwise you'll get nowhere in this world. You will remain that scrawny kid and that only leads to death. Weakness is a death sentence. "

My eyes slightly watered. "Is that why Isabel and Farlan died? They were weak?"  
Levi tried to reassure me but I pulled away from him with my heart racing and lip quivering.

"Am I going to die too? I'm weak so I'm going to die just like them? Just like them, I'm going to be eaten by those-those-"

"Don't be such an idiot," Levi said as he reeled me back to him. "They weren't weak, they were strong. They died…they died saving someone they cared about. And that, that's the greatest courage of all," Levi said to the best of his ability.

Comforting words never came naturally; it was an act he learned over time. However, I was completely grateful for Farlan's coaching. Levi's thumb rubbed the apple of my cheek while the other was nestled close to him. The moments of my friend's deaths spun around my head even though I was right with Levi. I thought his presence would shake the terrors, but like a disease it was hard to fight them off.

"You won't be a re-reluctant hero will you?" I asked through a round of sniffles. I felt Levi's fingers hesitate.

He took a deep breath, as much as his lungs would hold. "Elke-"

"Don't be brave Mister Levi. Don't ever be…"I whispered back. "You are all I have now."

"Sometimes…sacrifices have to be made." Levi mumbled. My throat burned at the sound of his words. Why, why was that so familiar?

The wind howled and stirred the wooden carts outside. Some of the horses nickered as the lighting flashed and thunder clapped. The rain bounced off the roofs while a group of soldiers could be heard running across the courtyard. Internally, a growing distress was brewing inside. An old feeling was starting to claw its way to the surface. A horror that couldn't even be described was sitting right under an old injury just waiting to strike at the perfect moment.

The clamor of yelling soldiers echoed louder, the storm roared more intensely, my thoughts began to flicker wildly like a deprived flame. The blood within me rushed through my veins, the sweat lightly tricked from my head. The fever in me rose as past began to unfold.

Levi's fingers trailed along the side of my head and neared closer to a sensitive mark.  
 **Flash.**

 _"Don't squirm anymore, be still Elke we don't want to miss this time. Just be a good girl for us." A male's voice spoke in the depths of the shadows. I felt my wrists and ankles bound harshly by thick straps. The smell of burning chemicals and rancid bodies intoxicated the area. The glistening of blinding metals came into focus._

 _The fine tip of a needle angled toward my neck._

 **Flash.**

 _"No-no-no please…" I choked as a lump of sticky spit was clogged in my throat. My muscles tightened as the venom sunk in. My body seized, every organ pulsing, every muscle twitching, my lungs dying as I begged for air. It was the horrible pain I felt time and time again as I was thrown relentlessly onto the metal table._

 **Flash.**

 _I looked over to see another body covered in a white sheet. A few figures shook their heads as they checked off notes on their clipboards. Across the way, was Amara fighting the restraints, another kid was gagging in the corner. My head spun. I watched as the empty needles were dropped into a waste bin._

 _"That's the third this week," A tall figure said._

 _"A change in this mixture should have a different result. I have high hopes for the new subjects, so far only outward side effects. No internal damage." Another spoke._

 _"What about the seizing?"_

 _"All temporary. The bodies are simply getting use to the new balance that is entering their bloodstream. It is most likely due to the large amount of blood being forced quickly around in their circulation system." A women's charming voice suggested. She reminded me of someone._

 **Flash.**

 _My lungs, why are they being suffocated so bad? My neck throbbing my head clouded, what's happening?_

 _"Elke behind you!" A friend called in a muffled tone. A husky breath breathed down my back from behind. The presence of a dark figure emerged from the shadows. I looked at my shaking hands; they were stained to a scarlet color, the floor the same._

 _I squinted my eyes as I looked at the hazy person in front of me. Her blotchy face looked as though it was screaming at me. Her finger pointed over my shoulder, as she lay on the floor unable to do much more._

 _I watched her mouth move the same way, the words could be read on her lips. But the sound, why was their no sound? Suddenly, a heavy load collided with the back of my skull and nothing expect the spreading of misery engulfed my senses._

 **Flash.**

 _Fingers trailed across my head. The pain was etched deep._  
 _The cold table rested under my chin again. The ties buckled me down. The sizzling of a scorching iron can closer to my ear._

 _"Sometimes sacrifices are necessary…" A man whispered._

"No!" I screamed frantically as I stumbled out of the bed, my body completely shaken and clammy to the touch. I gasped relentlessly as I stood limped in the center of the room. "No-no-no-no…" I mumbled robotically to myself. My hands clutched my arms for comfort as my eyes stared in a fixed trance.

Levi was over in an instant. I didn't see his expression since I couldn't take my eyes away from the floor. I was still caught in the hysterical memory. Levi reached towards me and I violently flinched when his hand made contact with my cheek.

"It's me brat; calm down," My guardian stated. My chest rapidly collected air before I peered into his steady eyes. Eventually, my adrenaline slowed and my mind came back to the present.

Levi was knelt in front of me, level with my line of sight. His hand barely rested on my face. It took a moment before I realized the feeling of it. My fevered cheeks steamed under his skin.

My eyes swelled with tears when I realized everything I just saw. The haunting past came knocking at the wrong time. I trembled, still out of control of my nerves, as I tried to find my voice.

"I-I-"

Levi moved his hand towards my right eye. The sight gone but the feeling not entirely numb. My salty tears poured from both, my nose stuffy from the sobbing minutes. My caretaker's thumb rubbed under my eye socket. His eyes locked on the blemish.

I swallowed, "I-I'm not a m-monster."

I cried well into the stormy night with Levi holding me just so, careful not to touch that dreaded sore that lingered on the back of my skull. The unsettling jitters from before tickled under my flesh. My eyes were swollen and my throat raw from distress, the pain still unforgettable.

My guardian now filled with concern.

Levi cradled me delicately as we rested on the bed. Neither of us were willing to give into our tired bodies. Sleep seemed to be an enemy that night. I tossed and turned even with Levi's jacket draped over my shoulders and Farlan's old shirt near too. Nothing could stop my mind from wondering.

Nothing could stop what had happened.

And nothing was going to stop what was to come.

"What are you?" I heard Levi question, his voice emotionless and his touch now hesitant.

* * *

 **Oh, wow didn't expect that did you?**

 **Getting fun and twisted here!**

 **Will post a full chapter once finals are over.**

 **Thanks everyone! :)**


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